Peter Pan

I wanted to break up the tension there, because it should feel more like two friends having a good time. But I get what you mean, it sticks a little bit out, because their movement and position in the room doesn’t match that well with the rest of the scene. A bit like Anakin teleporting through the garage during his confession to Padmé.

I think we shouldn’t cut after Qui-Gon’s death, this plotline is problematic because it has two consecutive low points, but if we go from Qui-Gon’s death directly to Obi-Wan falling in the pit, we end up with one big low point that we can pair up with Anakin stranding inside the control ship and Padmé being captured.
It also adds a bit of dramatic effect, because had Qui-Gon lasted only for a few seconds longer, Obi-Wan would have joined him against Maul. With this order we can also place Obi-Wan bisecting Maul before the destruction of the control ship and Gunray’s capture, thus placing the moment of triumph last, followed by Obi-Wan attending to Qui-Gon.

However we would lose Anakin restoring hope through his destruction of the control ship, in its place we would gain a cool cut connecting the scenes stylistically, if we go from Obi-Wan killing Maul with a green saber to the green lights in Anakin’s cockpit replacing the red.

All in all it should play out like this:

1.-10. the same as Eddie proposed, that works really nicely, I think
11. Continue the Lightsaber fight into the force field room (maybe the most jarring cut, because the fight essentially jumps from one level to another with only a short establishing shot between them)
12. Anakin joins the space battle (same as Eddies point 11)
13. Lightsaber fight continues, Qui-Gon is killed, Obi-Wan screams and just as Maul turns around to face him, the force field opens. Obi-Wan fights aggressively, but is thrown down into the pit by Maul.
14. Padmé and her team are captured and brought before Gunray (I think we would need another shot bridging the two scenes)
15. Anakin enters the droid control ship but is stranded
16. Maul taunts Obi-Wan, the later grabs Qui-Gon’s saber through the force, jumps out of the pit and bisects his opponent
17. Anakin restarts his ship and destroys the control ship
18. The Gungans are freed and we see how the droid army collapses.
19. Add a shot or two of collapsing droids to the throneroom scene, the Naboo pick up their weapons and the Viceroy is captured. Our heroes were victorious,
20. but Qui-Gon fell in the struggle, Obi-Wan knees besides his dying Master and promises to train Anakin.

I don’t like how Obi-Wan is a total dirtback in this scene. First he loses, then he lectures Anakin, claiming that his need for victory is blinded him, only to fight on until he is victorious. If anyone is blinded by a need for victory in this scene it is him and not his apprentice, who fought more aggressively, but fair and unlike his master, showed some decent sportsmanship after the fight.

So I recut the scene to fix this. I also trimmed down Anakin’s aggression, so that their duel feels more like a friendly game. Apart from that I tried to stabilize some shots and match the colors to AOTC. I also stretched the footage vertically to make Anakin’s face look a little slimmer and slightly adjusted Anakin’s voice in the beginning.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1ZTKua5rx4h2pdeotFPaJ_bA5Isa50bLl/view?usp=share_link

To me, only the first one feels like a self contained movie and only because we have the Tatooine stuff to bind the narrative together.

The Hologram is there to throw a bad light on Padmé and Dooku is there to show that he has nothing to do with Jango’s actions.

Peter Pan said:

Good idea, it actually references “the mistake of Naboo”. I think the whole scene will take a while for me to complete, but the audio is mostly finished. The only thing still missing is Dooku introducing himself, but I could upload what I have so far.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Mqt9MeF9mr08sP-wQAHjMqGHJSuidcuf/view?usp=sharing

Finally got around to finish the scene. I must say I am disappointed in how it turned out, granted some of the masking is a little off, but the bigger problem remains and that is the quality of the original footage.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1OMsP2KD0VSQV9rX3FQLquF_wAg55q8Ve/view?usp=share_link

The idea with this scene was to lay the ground for an edit that pushes the Kaminoans and the droid founders into a more active role. They hire Fett to disturb Padmé’s work (not kill her, explaining the stupid bugs). He also purposefully sets Obi-Wan on his tail, which will be emphasized by adding a shot of him preparing the toxic dart after meeting with Zam. Dooku and the separatist will play a more reactive role, they will only acquire the droid army as a reaction to the rising tension with the republic, much like padmé predicts during her meeting with he queen.

Moulin Rouge!
Lawrence of Arabia
Dr. Zhivago
We Are No Angels
In Bruges
Princess Mononoke
Knives Out
Murder on the Orient Express (not the new one)
Dr. Strangelove
Hot Fuzz
Life of Brian
Schindler’s List
Rocket Man
Shape of Water
Dead Poets Society
Amsterdam
The Life Aquatic
Fantastic Mr. Fox
Last Duel
LOTR

Anakin Starkiller said:

Oh right, there’s another one already. I forgot cuz it didn’t stick around on the first page long.

Anyway, what about non-SW focus threads? Would those be viable?

I agree with G&G-Fan, it would have to go into the “fan edits and projects for other properties” section. Thematically I would like to see a thread on LOTR edits that try to match the books more closely.

I’d vote for Episode II. I think, that out of the three prequels it has the biggest potential for improvement.

EDIT: However there are ulterior motives, I reckon. I am currently working on an alternate version of Padmé’s speech and I conjecture that the amount of feedback I will get is proportional to the attention AOTC gets 😄

Moin Moin

I had lost my wallet and yesterday I got a letter from the lost and found office. I went there today to pick it up and not a single coin was missing.

Great job.
Regarding the actors change in appearance, I feel like Anakin’s face is a bit wider and his shoulders are too. It makes him look older, more like in ROTS. Maybe you could mitigate the effect by slightly distorting the image.

My Christmas sweater has bloody LEDs that flash when I move, how can it get any better than that?!

Honestly the bigger “problem” with Luke and Leia being twins in Episode 3 is that Padmé and Anakin are always talking about THE baby, singular. How on earth does she not know that she is carrying twins?

The title says it all, I’m trying to gather as much footage of Jango as possible and I don’t want to miss any potential source.

Can you point to any bits that stood out in particular?
I always struggle to judge the quality of the audio, when it is a heavily reconstructed dialogue like this one. The problem is, that you are hearing it 200 times over the course of assembling it and by that time you understand every word it says, no matter the small shifts in volume, color and pronunciation.
Quite similar in fact, to how you learn to understand a particular accent and then it is hard to judge how comprehensive your new bit of dialogue really is.

Good idea, it actually references “the mistake of Naboo”. I think the whole scene will take a while for me to complete, but the audio is mostly finished. The only thing still missing is Dooku introducing himself, but I could upload what I have so far.

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Mqt9MeF9mr08sP-wQAHjMqGHJSuidcuf/view?usp=sharing

Now I was hitting this thread, because I wanted to ask a question. I spliced together a short holo-message of Dooku giving a speech about the republics downfall and the failure of the Jedi. The idea was to give the separatist more of an identity and to give Dooku a proper introduction.

The sound file is about 30 seconds long and it sounds a lot better with reverb to it, so I was thinking about adding a big hologram of Dooku to the deleted senate scene after the first attempt on Padmé.

However I fear that my footage might not be enough and therefore I was thinking about adding a shot of a bar or club, similar to place Zam is hiding, where the speech would run on a screen. This would also allow for a reaction shot or two of bystanders hearing the speech and that leads me to the question I wanted to ask:

Does anybody know a scene from another (sci-fy) movie that could serve as a template for this?

Nice work paja, I am intrigued what your version of the second race would look like, given what you have cut.

Rotoscoping hair is hell

SparkySywer said:

I’d like to have the Jedi themselves gradually become authoritarian over the course of the PT. At the beginning of Episode 1, they’re more like academics, diplomats, and thought leaders with no formal power in the galaxy, having given it up at the beginning of the long peace they live in. But this long peace is coming to an end, and the Jedi, reminiscing their past as defenders of peace and justice in the galaxy, illegally intervene in this war. This should be portrayed as a good thing, if they hadn’t, the bad guys would’ve just chewed up whatever planet they invaded and moved on to the next, and the Republic was incapable of stopping them without the Jedi.

The enemy responds by escalating the war to deal with the Jedi, to the point where the Jedi can no longer handle the war on their own. The Republic is at risk of being conquered, and the Jedi save the Republic by seizing more power and mobilizing a large, centralized army capable of fighting a galactic-scale war. Since the Jedi have been the boots on the ground, this army is answerable to the Jedi, not necessarily the Senate, giving the Jedi essentially more power than the Republic. After Episode 2, the galaxy may as well already be in the same political state as it is under the Empire, the only major difference being that the Jedi, who are trying to do the right thing, are in charge. The Senate won’t be dissolved until Episode 4, but in Episode 3 they’re just rubber stamping what the Jedi want to do anyway. Again, this should be something the audience is on board with. If they didn’t do this, the Republic would have been destroyed and someone far worse would have been ruling the galaxy.

The Senate would be more like the Roman Senate than the American Senate, where all the Senators have important bureaucratic jobs outside of legislating. Palpatine is the Jedi’s representative in the Senate, a very prestigious role before the PT but not powerful until the war happened. But now, Palpatine is essentially the commander-in-chief of an army which is more powerful than the Republic, and all he has to do to seize complete control of the galaxy for himself is to get the Jedi out of the picture. He does that, and that’s it. He sells this seizure of power easily, because ostensibly the only difference between the Jedi’s regime and his is that his regime is more effective and not self-sabotaging with allegiance to, like, ideals and morality. Now that Palpatine’s in power, the “Republic” easily wins the war they always should have been able to.

I wouldn’t want the audience realizing the Jedi were doing anything wrong until it’s in retrospect at the end of the trilogy. The Republic is cripplingly stalled by corruption and enough Senators are in the pockets of the enemy that the Jedi are the only ones capable of fighting a truly evil enemy, but they have the strategy of white blood cells and put the galaxy in a worse position because of it. If Palpatine’s behind the enemy here too, this could be his real plan, counting on the Jedi Code’s complete intolerance of the dark side to get them to seize power for him.

That would have been great.

5*41

paja said:

My try at executing Pan’s idea.

https://streamable.com/rnkglg

Cool, maybe we could add some interference or audio quirks to hide some of the off sentences.

Other than that I was reading through Neverar’s post and it got me thinking again. If the Kaminoans were trying to get Amidala out of the picture to cut out a deal with the republic, then we would need some indication, at least, that they are following a concrete plan, which doesn’t rely purely on coincidence.

The big question here is, how can this be accomplished within the framework of the existing movie.
So, albeit for a different reason and plot, Neverar was proposing a conversation between Gunray and Zam and pointed to the fact that there are two assassins.

This is important because the dart killing Zam is Jango’s way of leading the Jedi on to his trail. However the way it plays out originally feels random, thus breaking any illusion of a pre existing plan.

Though that could easily be changed by simply adding a closeup of Jango playing with the toxic dart in his hand, set to an ominous music cue at the end of his meeting with Zam.

Then I would simply remove the “missing data” point from the plot, there is no way to resolve it satisfyingly.

Obi visits Dex and goes to Kamino, there he learns of the army and questions Jango. This would be the tricky bit. We would need Jango to name drop Geonosis, maybe we could substitute it in for the “moons of Bogdan”.

And if it’s possible we should remove Sifo Dyas from the story, his is just another unresolved mystery distracting from the plot.

Now Obi contacts the council, reporting his suspicion, but he isn’t urged to capture Fett. Afterwards we could use the analysis droid deleted scene and change the droids line.
He analyses the dart and points out that the poison stems from a certain species of centipedes living on Geonosis. To drive the point home that these are indeed the bugs from the assassination attempt we could add a small graphic to the screen infront of Obi.

After that Obi charges to catch Jango and fights him on the landing platform, but the bounty hunter escapes without Obi-Wan placing a homing beacon on the ship.

After that the Jedi visits Geonosis and lands without facing any complications. (sadly there is no space for the Dolby surround sound bombs)

He spies on the separatist, no mention of any assassinations here, then contacts coruscant revealing both armies and gets arrested before accusing any party of the attempted murder.
One of the senators then blames the separatist and proceeds to call upon the chancellor to build an army. Yoda and Mace share a short glance at each other, but remain silent.

Meanwhile Dooku visits Obi-Wan in his cell. The Jedi claims to be looking for Fett, but he doesn’t insist on his presence on Geonosis. Jango only arrives after this scene, during the night, before Anakin and Padmé try to rescue Obi-Wan.

From this point on it should be smooth sailing.
Maybe cut Sidious’ final scene with Dooku, but there isn’t anything bigger in need of change.

I was approached by my professor about writing my bachelor thesis at her department. And in general this semester is going great, everything involving algebra and number theory is fascinating. The only course that I struggle to enjoy is elementary differential geometry, there is simply too much arithmetic involved. The greatest thing about leaving school mathematics behind was not needing to memorize that many formulas any more. Well, this course turned out to be just like that all over again.

NeverarGreat said:

“Do you think these cloners are involved in the plot to assassinate Senator Amidala?”
“No Master, there appears to be no motive.”

thereifixedit

If we’re at it, we should turn Mace‘s question into a suspicion: “You think these cloners are …” Answer: “Yes, Master” (taken from the end of the transmission)

I mean Obi-Wan just gave them the motive, he told them that these people want to sell an army. It makes no sense for Mace to ask an open question like that.