Paul the apostle

CHRomer said:

Your ideas are quite interesting. I’ll take a look at the script and give you feedback once I’ve read it. As you said, this is a first draft, so if you don’t mind, I’ll give you some recommendations that I consider important:

• Describe the characters more physically. For example, in this episode, I don’t know what Obi-Wan looks like physically. I don’t know if he has short or long hair, if he has a beard, or even what he’s wearing.
  Basically, the idea is to describe them better, but you can also use references to describe them. For example, when introducing Anakin, instead of saying he has medium-length hair, you can say he has a hairstyle similar to Luke’s in Episode V. Or, for example, with clothing, when you introduce Obi-Wan, say that Obi-Wan is dressed in a Jedi uniform like Luke’s in Episode VI, but instead of being black, it’s brown.

• Indicate the age of the important characters. Here the idea is very similar to the previous one. I don’t know how old the characters are in this episode. I don’t know if Obi-Wan is 30, 35. An example of how to do it would be something like this: Obi-Wan Kenobi (30 or 30 y.o.) or Obi-Wan Kenobi, he is 30 years old. And, obviously, do it in every episode, since, at least for now, we don’t know how many years pass from Ep.I to Ep.II or from Ep.II to Ep.III.

I also want to clarify that I’m not saying you should do this with everyone, just with the important characters. But at the very least, do it with Anakin, Obi-Wan, Mother Skywalker, etc.

I should also add, as I mentioned before, that I haven’t read the script yet, only skimming it. I’d add that it would be nice if you gave Anakin’s father a name and not just referred to him as “FATHER.” I don’t know if his name is revealed later, but it would be nice if he had one.

If you’re interested, I can tell you where to find some prequel rewrites that I think are quite interesting, in case you want to see how they did it and maybe get some ideas.

Thanks, looking forward to what you say.
For the age and appearance of the characters I have made some notes and concepts, but didn’t put it in the script because I read that a screenplay should not contain this information. I think it makes sense because the purpose of the screenplay is to help the director and actors to create the scenes. The actual background information and design is done seperately, I just have not figured out an effective way to share it. I thought maybe a discord server could help.
Reading some other rewrites would definitely be interesting. I know a few already and some where really good.

Hello. It has been done before, but here is my take on a rewrite for the Star Wars Prequel Trilogy [PT]. I started this some years ago, but only recently managed to get some first drafts of scripts done. But let´s start with a short introduction.

The Premise

The year is 1983 and all of the original movies have been released. Now it is time to collect what these movies reveal about a prequel story and fill in the gaps with some logical and exciting plot. The Title says based on the Original Trilogy [OT] only, but there is some inspiration from the actual prequels and other sources anyways. This is inevitable to some degree and what is meant is rather, that this is supposed to be an new story for the movies that fits in perfectly with the OT regarding the themes and feel.

A concept

Main Character
The protagonist of the OT is Luke Skywalker. He is the hero of the story and it has a happy end. For the PT, assuming you want to tell the story of Anakin´s fall to the dark side, there is no happy end. Anakin Skywalker is a tragic character in nature. This begs the question, who might be the main character in the PT? The answer is Obi-Wan. Not only is he in a good position to tell the story of the prequels from a political and personal viewpoint because he is a witness to most events, but it also compliments Anakin´s Character and the Story as a whole. In the PT he turns from good to evil with the main character causing his fall and in the OT it is reversed with Luke helping him to return to the light side.
Obi-Wan´s character will develop from a young, arrogant and proud know-it-all to the humble and wise man we see in the OT. This explains why he “took it upon [himself] to train [Anakin] as a Jedi”. It is also the reason why he fails and because of that and other experiences he starts to grow.

Setting
The galaxy in the OT is ruled by the empire. It´s presence and power fluctuates from place to place, but it is implied that the Empire is the hegemonic power in the galaxy. When Obi-Wan tells Luke about the Clone Wars though, he calls it an “idealistic crusade”. Because we know that the Jedi were the “guardians of peace and justice in the old Republic” and we also know that Anakin and Obi-Wan were Jedi who went on this so called crusade, we can conclude that during the PT the Republic waged some kind of war against star systems in the galaxy that were not part of the Republic. The Republik, which then later turned to, or was replaced by the empire (which I will talk about later), was therefore only a regional power in the Galaxy and through or after an expansion turned into the hegemonic Empire.

The Jedi and the Force
The Jedi in the OT are a mystery, a relic of old times. At several points it is implied, that they were once plenty of Jedi, which were then hunted by Darth Vader and the Emperor. This begs some questions. What is the Force? Who were the Jedi? How were they organised? What was their status in the Galaxy? Why were they hunted? Why is the Emperor ok with Vader living and why is he the only Jedi in his service?
From Yoda´s teachings it seems logical to assume, that the Force is the de facto “deity” in the Star Wars Universe. It is the spiritual origin of the material world. Interacting with it and having a strong connection to it allows the user to access the raw and immense power of the universe, which is only limited by the extend of ones believe. This means the Jedi are a religion. The theological debate however is not about weather the force actually exists or not, but what side you should follow. Since the Force is accessible for everyone though, it´s easy to imagine people in the galaxy using it to gain power and thus establishing their own small “empires” and perhaps clans or dynasties while immediately eliminating potential threats by other force users. Being called guardians of peace and justice, it seems logical that the Jedi see themselves as servants and do not abuse their power for their own sake, but to protect others. This is consistent with Yoda´s and Obi-Wan´s teachings and Luke´s actions. In the realm of their influence it was possible for the Republic to form. During the Clone Wars the Jedi pushed the Republic Senate to advance into the rest of the Galaxy to bring an end to those tyrants.
Amidst this chaos, which the Jedi partially caused, it should be easy for the Emperor to establish a new, true religion as an alternative to the Jedi doctrine. He could then claim that this new religion would correct the old errors of the Jedi and bring an end to the war, therefor the Jedi should join his new Sith Order. Some Jedi convert, the rest are marked as traitors, also because it has long been speculated and there is more and more evidence that it is force users, a.k.a Jedi who are necessary to keep the clones alive. What follows is Jedi killing Jedi, misguided by Palpatine. Only the strongest of them, Darth Vader, survives. The Emperor decides to keep him as an elite soldier to do his dirty work.

The Clone Wars
As the name implies, there were some clones involved. In episode 5 we learn the following from Yoda about the Force: “Life creates it, makes it grow.” This could be interpreted in a way, that the will of the Force is required to create life. The act of cloning in this story requires a force user to manipulate the force to prevent the clones from dying. The creators of those clones now have an immense power over them, because their life is tied to the will of their maker. Warlords outside of the Republic might use it to create armies and by doing so caused the Republic and the Jedi to intervene.

The rewritten PT

Episode I - Revenge of the Clone Army

Note that this is a first draft only and is still being worked on. There are still some parts that need polishing to come full circle. I am posting this to get some feedback and improve it. The goal is to create a really good version of the prequels and eventually turn it into an animation film, or rather a trilogy.
Here is a discord link for easier communication. Maybe i will post some concept art there: https://discord.gg/tEMpuDrZvq

https://www.celtx.com/auth/public/resource/p4auhsvj

The first movie introduces the key characters of the PT.
-Obi-Wan Kenobi, a Jedi-Knight and captain in the starfleet of Alderaan
-Anakin Skywalker, a Pilot who had to leave his homeworld Alderaan in the first clone war. he is torn between leaving his girlfriend Idun and helping his father and sister
-Brendan Organa, Admiral of Alderaan and son of a gouverneur of the Republik
-Yistong, the former King of Alderaan and a powerfull force user who was exiled by a coup of conspirators surrounding Brendans father
-Idun, the daughter of Yistong who was trained by him, but despised him and his ways. before Anakin moved away, she trained him in the force
-Palpatine, a cunning and charismatic Senator who convinces the Senate to grant him temporary access to power over republic forces. during studies outside of the republic he was trained in the force and therefore has no moral compass unlike a Jedi

The movie starts with Yistong leading a clone army against the Republic to gain back the power he lost.

Episode II - The Shadow of the Sith Order

The second installment will dive deeper in to the conflict of good vs evil, light vs dark or Jedi vs Sith. Note, that Vader is called “dark lord of the Sith” as early as episode 4. The word itself is never mentioned in any of the original movies though. It will need to be properly explained who the Sith are and why only Vader is left. The Emperor himself is not a Sith in this version, because it is not publicly known that he uses the Force. He founds the Sith Order to use the Jedi as elite warriors to his advantage.

Episode III - Fall of the Republik

In the grand finally the Emperor makes his move on the capital city and the senate of the Republik. We see him establish the Empire with the help of the senators that did not flee. His opponents arrive with a massive fleet to stop him, but they are massacred and flee. The survivors are pardoned, but in secret they form the rebel alliance.