Hello, everyone! This is my first post on OT.com, but you may have seen me on fanedit as Infamous TC. I'm a fanfiction author, best known in the Harry Potter fandom. I was actually drawn into the world of fanediting by ADigitalMan's Extended Editions of the HP movies. I feel I have a very strong grasp of storytelling, and the story is my chief complaint about the Prequel trilogy. I have seen the Red Letter Media reviews and was very grateful to finally have so much of what bothered me condensed to 60 minutes.
This thread is a very long slough, but I made it through all 239 pages. There's a lot of great ideas. Someone buy Angel a copy of Vegas so he can learn to fanedit. I would suggest (respectfully) that there are not enough truly radical and yet practical ideas. I would like to state for the record that the following idea was conceived before I read through this entire thread, though certain refinements have been made based on discussion here.
The problem with Ep1 is that there are too many interconnected plots. They need to be separated. I suggest cutting out all of the Naboo plot entirely and make the story the discovery of Anakin.
Qui-Gon senses a vergence in the Force. He heads off to Tattooine (either with the blessing of the Council, without the blessing of the Council, or without their knowledge at all) with his apprentice Obi-Wan.
At the same time, the Sith have also detected the vergence, and Sidious sends Maul to investigate.
Qui-Gon discovers Anakin, but he is unable to persuade Watto to sell the boy. Setup for the podrace and have the stakes be Anakin's freedom. This could also be one of the other ideas I've seen here where Qui-Gon sees the human boy podracing and figures out this is who he came to find.
Podrace. Anakin wins, and thus earns his own freedom.
Deleted probe droid sequence. Duel between Qui-Gon and Maul.
Return to Coruscant. Anakin before the Jedi Council. He will not be trained.
Maul returns to Coruscant and tries to steal Anakin, setting up the Duel of the Fates. It will not longer be incongruous to fight in this setting, as it will be on Coruscant now.
Maul kills Qui-Gon, Obi-Wan kills Maul, and nobody knows what's going on with the Sith.
Obi-Wan promoted to Jedi Knight, and he takes Anakin as his apprentice. I actually really like the idea I saw in the thread of this being without the approval of the council, thus making his fall more of Obi-Wan's fault.
Roll credits.
The problem with Ep2 is that the whole assassination plot is just plain dumb. I won't rehash why. My Muse has suggested the following:
(begin crawl)
The Galactic Republic is Crumbling. Former Jedi Count Dooku rails against the corruption, and more star systems join his Separatist movement every day. Both sides are beating the drums of war.
Queen Padme Amidala is a staunch supporter of the Republic, but her home planet of Naboo lies close to rebellious systems. The Trayd Federation has just severed all diplomatic ties, and their ships are on the move.
The Jedi Council is overwhelmed with trying to keep peace in the Republic. A mysterious message from the past contains coordinates that do not match any known system. Jedi Knight Obi-Wan Kenobi has been assigned to investigate.
(end crawl)
Open with the ships of the Trayd Federation invading Naboo.
Communications disruption. Invasion.
Gungun battle.
Queen Amidala escapes. Use the palace scenes from the end to simulate getting to the ship. I can use "We've got to get to that hangar!" from Episode II here to non-stupid effect. Blast off and run the blockade.
Obi-Wan is instructed to get to the bottom of the message, which is from Master Sifa-Dias and contains the coordinates of Kamino. He determines that there's no such system, but he trusts in the Force and goes off anyway. No stupid kids with stupid lightsabers!
Obi-Wan lands on Kamino and discovers the army and reports back. Jango Fett plays no part in the plot now, so I will cut him entirely.
Coruscant. Palpatine's office. Dooku is a political idealist. Imply that he is behind the invasion of Naboo rather than the assassination attempt.
Amidala addresses the Senate and reports the fall of Naboo. I can use a mix of her address in Episodes I and II here. She calls for a vote of no confidence.
Anakin is ordered to guard Queen Amidala. Vacation!
Obi-Wan investigates the Separatists and discovers the droid army.
Anakin and Padme fall in love. Most of the dialogue will need to go, but some lines are okay. It is meant to seem quick, a passionate mistake. No more rejection, and no more whininess to deserve rejection.
Palpatine elected. Senator Jar-Jar Binks proposes Emergency Powers.
Obi-Wan reports. I was planning on cutting the visit to Tatooine entirely, but I sorta like the idea of just cutting the slaughter of the Sand People. A&P go to Geonosis to help Obi-Wan. No factory scene. Imply that they arrive at the same time as the Republic.
Clones attack, using heavily trimmed bits of the latter droid/clone battle, then some of the arena battle. Cut directly to the hangar bay and Dooku trying to escape.
Dooku duels Obi-Wan and Anakin and escapes. No Yoda-saber-flipping.
Anakin and Padme married in secret.
Anakin promoted to Jedi Knight.
I don't have specific ideas for Ep3 yet, but I would definitely have Dooku as a rogue Jedi. I would also keep Padme's pregnancy secret even from Anakin. I would cut the birth of Vader, the birth of the twins, the Yoda-Palpatine duel, and the Death Star fanservice.
Thoughts?