Broadbeck7

Hey Acbagel, I received the link to your edit last night and just wanted to share my thoughts on the first two episodes thus far. I do have some feedback, if you’re interested, but I don’t mean it in any negative way. These were just things that I noticed and I think could be easy fixes.

Your first film was excellent. Other than a few audio transitions here and there, I have no notes. I loved your incorporation of Episode 6 “The Prisoner” into earlier in the story; that episode was always my least favorite from Season 1, because I just didn’t understand its purpose in the narrative until it was retroactively made important in Season 2. Having it take place in between Mando dropping Grogu off to the Client and rescuing Grogu was an excellent decision, as it benefitted the story in many ways, showing Mando’s growing disillusion with the Bounty Hunter’s guild, his disdain for droids, and his good heart when trying to rescue the New Republic officer, all elements we saw in previous episodes of the show, which made Episode 6 feel a little pointless in the normal viewing order. Also loved the overall trimming to some of the episodes, like shortening Episode 1’s prologue and saving Din’s flashbacks until the very end. The finale where the escape from Nevarro was intercut with the flashbacks of Din being rescued was genuinely impressive.

Unfortunately, I had a few problems with Movie 2 that I think held the film back a bit. There was a lot I loved, like the concurrent storylines of Boba and Mando on Tatooine or the reordering of Episode 7 and Episode 8’s finale to make Kuill’s death and Gideon’s proposal make more sense, or the trimming of Boba’s time with the Tuskens to make him more badass.

Here’s the issues I had though:

• I really appreciated your decision to cut out the raider’s storyline on Sorgan, as I am sick to death of the “training the town to defend themselves” storylines that have been so overplayed in media, even in Star Wars itself. Keeping the focus on Mando’s “exile” on the planet was a great decision, but I think it causes problems for the character of Cara Dune. Without the raider’s subplot, Cara’s introduction and friendship with Mando feels a little abrupt and rushed, seeing as how these characters haven’t really done anything to warrant a friendship, except tussle with one another. This is really just a minor nitpick, as I ultimately prefer the raider storyline being removed.

• Continuing off of the Sorgan storyline, a downside to moving Episode 6 to your first film is that after leaving Sorgan, Mando has a quick little side adventure on Tatooine, before returning to Sorgan to recruit Cara for his mission on Nevarro. I feel like maybe these events should be switched: Start Mando’s story on Tatooine, shortly after escaping Nevarro, showing the immediate consequences of him turning on the Guild by Fennec and Toro recognizing his betrayal, then have Mando go into hiding on Sorgan, the bounty hunter shows up, Mando recruits Cara, and then we return to Nevarro. Of course, this all depends on how you edit around these scenes to make them link up seamlessly, but I think this order would benefit the narrative so that rather than Mando jumping back and forth from Sorgan, you can just have him stay on the planet before his departure to Nevarro.

• I understand the need to trim down scenes, as Movie 2 is already two and a half hours long, however, I did feel like this film was a little too trimmed in my opinion, specifically for the scenes involving Toro and Fennec. Though a lot of people don’t like Episode 5, my favorite scene from that episode was the conversation between Fennec and Toro, as you think Fennec is going to manipulate this rookie into letting her go, only for Toro to turn the tables on her and shoot her. I understand what you were going for, giving Toro more agency, but it came off as confusing that Toro would go through all of this trouble with Fennec if Mando was his end goal, and due to the dark lighting of the episode during this scene, it was hard to tell who was even slumped over on the ground, until Mando is confronted by Toro at the shuttle bay. Adding this scene back in would develop both characters imo, and make Toro’s betrayal and Fennec’s injury more tangible. Continuing off that, I felt like too much was cut down between Boba and Fennec’s interactions, especially their infiltration of Jabba’s palace. It seemed a little too easy to reach the hangar, and I personally really liked the recon droid scouting out the palace.

• Finally, little nitpick, but I think the scene where IG-11 takes off Mando’s helmet should have stayed in. I understand the desire to keep Din’s identity more of a secret throughout the show, but I think having Din show vulnerability to a droid by letting his helmet get taken off provides stronger development to their arc, and explains a little bit more of Mando’s hesitance to let IG die. By removing the scene, it seems like Mando just shrugs off his injury no big deal, which undermines how serious the situation seemed to be beforehand, with Mando wanting to be left behind.

Overall, my final conclusion is that I think Movie 2 would work better if it was segmented like a Game of Thrones episode, such as “Battle of the Bastards”, with an A and B plot changing up every 10-15 minutes, rather than the frequent intercutting. I would start with Boba’s flashbacks up to his adoption in the Tusken tribe, switch over to Mando stopping at Tatooine and show the concurrency of the two plots. Then have Mando go to Sorgan, after receiving Greef’s message, while Boba and Fennec infiltrate the palace and search for Boba’s armor. Then conclude the film with Mando forming his team and returning to Nevarro for the big finish.

Sorry for the long post, I just had a lot of thoughts, but I’m excited to start Movie 3! I noticed you’ve gone through a lot of revisions with these films, so I’m sorry if my feedback is giving you even more second thoughts. Regardless, I’ve had a great time thus far watching these.