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The Rise of Skywalker: Ascendant (Released) — Page 520

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Like what you did Sherlock! Only thing that doesn’t sound quite right to me is the background fire and such. The dialogue is great though.

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That’s very well done sherlockpotter! 😃
One little addition that I think might be worth looking into would be to include some deep, low rumbles here and there to imply small explosions or blasts happening in the distance. Seems like that would be the case in any actual Star Wars gunfight. 😉

My homeworld is Australia so be wary of timezones!

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Burbin said:

Hate to be the sourpuss over so many of these proposed changes, I just think the original scene/dialogue is fine as is.

Changing Zorii’s line to “I don’t believe that (the war is over)” suggests she has a stake/opinion on the ongoing war. Along with the rest of the dialogue changes it makes it seem like she’s basically admiting to Poe that she’s part of the Kijimi rebellion, right after saying she’s planning to abandon it all and flee, alining with Poe’s sentiments that everyone’s giving up. It’s just an odd contrast. I feel the Kijimi rebellion stuff should be kept as subtle background since we’re so limited on what can actually be shown, bringing it to the forefront just exposes the limitations of being a fanedit.

That’s fair, I get where you’re coming from. To me, “I don’t believe you believe that” just sounds very clunky and unnatural, which is why I wanted to change it. Ideally, she’d say “You don’t believe that,” but as MR pointed out the other day, that’s a surprisingly tricky splice to make.

My intention was to convey that Zorii is telling Poe, “I don’t believe that people are giving up. Listen, you idiot; you can hear them fighting for your cause.” Personally, I don’t take that to mean she’s also fighting for the Republic. Just that other people are. In this new version we’re working on, she’d be surrounded by Republic supporters, whether or not she herself is one. And also, whether “she doesn’t believe that,” or “she doesn’t believe that he believes that,” she still tells him in the next line that “You’re not alone,” so she’s already telegraphing sympathy for his cause…It’s just a tricky semantics situation all around.

Jar Jar Bricks said:

Burbin said:

Hate to be the sourpuss over so many of these proposed changes, I just think the original scene/dialogue is fine as is.

Changing Zorii’s line to “I don’t believe that (the war is over)” suggests she has a stake/opinion on the ongoing war. Along with the rest of the dialogue changes it makes it seem like she’s basically admiting to Poe that she’s part of the Kijimi rebellion, right after saying she’s planning to abandon it all and flee, alining with Poe’s sentiments that everyone’s giving up. It’s just an odd contrast. I feel the Kijimi rebellion stuff should be kept as subtle background since we’re so limited on what can actually be shown, bringing it to the forefront just exposes the limitations of being a fanedit.

Mostly agree with this. Beforehand she goes on about how she “can’t stand the cries anymore” and wants to go on her own adventures, so those ideas are partially conflicting. That’s why it’s supposed to be a surprise when she shows up on Exegol later on.

Oh god…Christ, I forgot about this line. Screw this movie, haha. That’s a good catch, Jar Jar; thank you. That’s another line that doesn’t quite jive with the “Kijimi in rebellion” angle, so we’ll have to fix that. Could we cut that line entirely? “First Order took most of the kids a long time ago… I’ve saved up enough to get out. I’m going to the colonies.” That should effectively explain that she’s done with this planet, right? Or would we have to change it to something like “This isn’t my fight. I’ve saved up enough to get out”?

But yeah, since “the cries” are now the calls to rebellion, she comes across as an old geezer wanting the neighborhood kids to get off her yard. “You youngsters! Back in my day, when an evil regime oppressed us, we stood there and took it! Bah.”

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I really appreciate all of the kind words, everyone! Thank you! To address a few of the comments all at once:

The background/fighting audio is definitely not finished yet. I’m planning on adding more texture to it, more reverb, some explosions (good idea, Chase!), etc. And I definitely need to figure out how to make everything sound more distant. krausfadr and Nev, I’ll try out those suggestions, thanks! I may try to play with the EQ a bit too; it’s my first time doing an effect like this, so I’m all ears for other tips!

I can try to get “You don’t believe that” to work. Like I said above though, it’s been a surprisingly difficult edit to make, so we’ll see what happens.

Cap, if you (or others) are willing to record some distant shouts for us, I’m sure that would be useful! We should talk to axlanian too about what exactly those would be - that could be really helpful for some of the audio mixing he was working on as well.

Finally, regarding the use of “For Skywalker” before the ending… Personally, I like the idea that this is the rallying cry behind which the galaxy has united (Star Wars’ version of “Remember the Alamo”); so in that respect, I like peppering it in every once and a while. It feels like a natural way of building the world, as well as foreshadowing/building to the ending of the story. That said, if people would prefer to make the line kind of a surprise for the finale, that’s valid too. We’d probably need a new line to replace it here though.


Less important, but it really is weird how depressed and prone to giving up Poe is in this movie, considering his story in TLJ was about being too bold and reckless. I don’t know if it’s possible/worth it to change it in any reasonable capacity, but still…weird. Like I said, it’s not a character arc - it’s a character cosine.

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I think just trimming the bit about “the cries” works best for Kijimi In Revolt regardless.

I’d like to try and record some stuff once we know exactly what we need, but I’m not sure if I have a space near me where I could really go and yell battle dialogue a hundred metres from a recorder lol.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

The Rise of Skywalker Expanded Edition by Rae Carson: The Faraday Edit, The Last Jedi: Stoic Edition, Revenge of the Sith: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Godzilla Vs Megalon, The Light Rises, Faraday Junior’s Star Wars

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Inspired by Sherlock’s clip, I decided to put some time aside to actually contribute something for the first time in ages.

Here’s my take on Kijimi in chaos and a new idea on how to set up the conversation Poe has with Zorii.

https://streamable.com/dw0x39

My homeworld is Australia so be wary of timezones!

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^ Nice! I think something other than what in the real world would be deeply disturbing nearby huge fireball explosions with something more distant and matching their casual conversational tone.

Well done. I will disengage self-destruct initiative.

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Chase Adams said:

Inspired by Sherlock’s clip, I decided to put some time aside to actually contribute something for the first time in ages.

Here’s my take on Kijimi in chaos and a new idea on how to set up the conversation Poe has with Zorii.

https://streamable.com/dw0x39

I don’t really remember this scene in the theatrical cut and I can’t tell what’s been altered here. So, that’s surely a good sign that the edit has been done well!

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

The Rise of Skywalker Expanded Edition by Rae Carson: The Faraday Edit, The Last Jedi: Stoic Edition, Revenge of the Sith: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Godzilla Vs Megalon, The Light Rises, Faraday Junior’s Star Wars

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Movies Remastered said:

Loving these little additions. It really gives Kijimi more depth and drama. It does highlight why the next scene would be a bunch of people chilling in a bar though?

Bar scene happened earlier, when they first met Babu.

My homeworld is Australia so be wary of timezones!

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I’m loving how those little additions are building up to the final battle, making the DOFT dna pop out a bit more, of course in TROS own way. “They’re just people” is now far more well deserved.

the dark side of the force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural

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One idea I’ve seen on Reddit (don’t remember who it’s from, though) is putting in Duel of the Fates during Ben’s fight with the Knights of Ren. I think it’s a great idea; in TPM as Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan were fighting Maul for the Chosen One’s future, here in TRoS Ben is fighting his way through for Rey’s fate. Thoughts?

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Hal already included a portion of duel of the fates in Rey and Kylo’s actual duel. I personally don’t think that’s the right moment for it, Testing.

The only other place I’d be interested in seeing it would be when the Sith cultists are chanting (I think someone made a concept of that already?)

And Chase, where exactly in the film does that footage come from? I seem to remember footage of First Order troopers on Kijimi from the documentary that could be used so we wouldn’t be removing a transition from somewhere else. Other than that, I definitely like it.

Tragedy of Vader - A Novelization of The Rise of Skywalker

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Jar Jar Bricks said:

And Chase, where exactly in the film does that footage come from? I seem to remember footage of First Order troopers on Kijimi from the documentary that could be used so we wouldn’t be removing a transition from somewhere else. Other than that, I definitely like it.

That footage is repurposed from later in the film. It’s originally placed when Kylo lands on Kijimi and says one line or two to the Knights of Ren.

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Chase Adams said:

Movies Remastered said:

Loving these little additions. It really gives Kijimi more depth and drama. It does highlight why the next scene would be a bunch of people chilling in a bar though?

Bar scene happened earlier, when they first met Babu.

I think this is a great idea. Having the sounds gradually increase as the invasion or night raids begin. Could you share your sources once you’re happy with them?

Check out - http://www.youtube.com/moviesremastered

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Chase Adams said:

Inspired by Sherlock’s clip, I decided to put some time aside to actually contribute something for the first time in ages.

Here’s my take on Kijimi in chaos and a new idea on how to set up the conversation Poe has with Zorii.

https://streamable.com/dw0x39

That works really well, Chase; and I love the audio work too! Beautiful job!

Jar Jar Bricks said:

I seem to remember footage of First Order troopers on Kijimi from the documentary that could be used so we wouldn’t be removing a transition from somewhere else. Other than that, I definitely like it.

I don’t remember that footage. Would we be able to add it in later? My one worry with this would be replacing the footage in the original spot later on; so this might be a workaround.

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You guys are taking non interesting moments and pumping them full of meaning. I love it

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ThisIsCreation said:

You guys are taking non interesting moments and pumping them full of meaning. I love it

I agree, just checked stuff out and I’m liking these ideas, fantastic

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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Is the VFX shot of Darth Nihilus as a background statue behind Kylo Ren being used in this edit?

The name’s Lawson. Noah Lawson.

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Regarding the Kijimi rebellion stuff. I think the graffiti shouldn’t be there. Not that I’m against the Kijimi rebellion idea, but I think it should be a surprise for Poe and us during his conversation with Zorii — we’d feel hopeless with Poe, and when Zorii convinces him otherwise… we’d begin to feel hopeful alongside Poe.

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Master Lawdog said:

Is the VFX shot of Darth Nihilus as a background statue behind Kylo Ren being used in this edit?

I was thinking about this today actually, I loved that edit that was posted here awhile ago.

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Master Lawdog said:

Is the VFX shot of Darth Nihilus as a background statue behind Kylo Ren being used in this edit?

If someone can send it to me it will be.

And I agree, Test: If Kijimi is to he shown rioting, we shouldn’t really see it until that moment.

I’m still not totally sold on using the idea overall. It’s great, and could totally have been done well while making the movie. I’m just still a little skeptical of doing it via fan editing in a way that would’ve worked completely if projected in theaters for real.

Well done. I will disengage self-destruct initiative.