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oscars 2018 — Page 5

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I’ve heard it discussed before. For the record, it’s 17 and 24, which is definitely on the sketchy line but not egregious by any means. But I will say I knew a few people in high school who were dating people in their twenties and their parents didn’t seem to care. In many places the age of consent is 16.

Ultimately the movie isn’t really about that. The exact ages aren’t important so much as it is about a young man having a relationship with a slightly older young man. I think the audience is primarily people who like quality films. Weird that you think it’s targeting pedophiles or whatever.

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Yikes. Is Uncle Roy the common term for a creepy friend/relative? I’ve been watching season four of Saturday Night Live and got to the infamous Uncle Roy sketch, where Buck Henry’s character is the middle aged babysitter playing increasingly creepy games with his young charges while the parents are out for the evening. (And taking lots of Polaroids.) Not sure SNL could get away with that today.

originaltrilogy.com Moderator

Where were you in '77?

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If Armie Hammer looked 24, it’d be fine, but he’s, what, 10 years older than that?

The Drink in Question

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SilverWook said:

Yikes. Is Uncle Roy the common term for a creepy friend/relative? I’ve been watching season four of Saturday Night Live and got to the infamous Uncle Roy sketch, where Buck Henry’s character is the middle aged babysitter playing increasingly creepy games with his young charges while the parents are out for the evening. (And taking lots of Polaroids.) Not sure SNL could get away with that today.

He’s not creepy though, that’s the thing. He’s just a student of the lead’s dad.

suspiciouscoffee said:

If Armie Hammer looked 24, it’d be fine, but he’s, what, 10 years older than that?

  1. Timothee Chalamet is 22. You sorta have to roll with it.
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Actors playing characters much younger than themselves is nothing new in Hollywood. MST3k frequently calls out movies with teens who look like they’re pushing 40.

originaltrilogy.com Moderator

Where were you in '77?

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Oh hai Luke!

Don’t do drugs, unless you’re with me.

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17 and 24 isn’t a big deal. I don’t see how that would appeal to pedophiles since pedophiles are known to prey on children, not young men that are legally adults in most states and countries.

EDIT: I agree though that the parental response that you described is extremely unrealistic if that’s how it was portrayed. I haven’t seen the movie and never will.

The Person in Question

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moviefreakedmind said:

17 and 24 isn’t a big deal. I don’t see how that would appeal to pedophiles since pedophiles are known to prey on children, not young men that are legally adults in most states and countries.

In the novel they are 17 and 24. I don’t remember that being mentioned in the film, where they look 14 and 40.

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Puggo - Jar Jar’s Yoda said:

moviefreakedmind said:

17 and 24 isn’t a big deal. I don’t see how that would appeal to pedophiles since pedophiles are known to prey on children, not young men that are legally adults in most states and countries.

In the novel they are 17 and 24. I don’t remember that being mentioned in the film, where they look 14 and 40.

Oh, okay. That’s potentially different then. Again, I haven’t seen the movie. It is strange that such a thing would get positive attention now given Hollywood’s problem with power dynamics and sexual relationships, harassment aside.

The Person in Question

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moviefreakedmind said:

EDIT: I agree though that the parental response that you described is extremely unrealistic if that’s how it was portrayed. I haven’t seen the movie and never will.

It makes sense in context. The two are good friends well before it gets sexual. The dad knows and likes the older guy well enough to invite him to their house for the summer so it’s not like he’s some rando old dude. And there’s no “preying,” it’s entirely consensual.

Puggo - Jar Jar’s Yoda said:

moviefreakedmind said:

17 and 24 isn’t a big deal. I don’t see how that would appeal to pedophiles since pedophiles are known to prey on children, not young men that are legally adults in most states and countries.

In the novel they are 17 and 24. I don’t remember that being mentioned in the film, where they look 14 and 40.

It’s not mentioned but there’s no reason to doubt it. Elio is almost out of high school. Oliver is in college. It’s not supposed to be weird. Like I said Hammer is 31 and Chalamet is 22. You can criticize the casting but the movie isn’t about pedophilia.

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Puggo - Jar Jar’s Yoda said:

Throughout the movie I thought that Oliver was a visiting scholar. He was extremely worldly and often corrected the father.

No, Oliver is a student of his. There’s one scene where he corrects the father, but the father made the mistake on purpose to test him. His wife mentions that he does that for every student of his that visits.

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DominicCobb said:

moviefreakedmind said:

EDIT: I agree though that the parental response that you described is extremely unrealistic if that’s how it was portrayed. I haven’t seen the movie and never will.

It makes sense in context. The two are good friends well before it gets sexual. The dad knows and likes the older guy well enough to invite him to their house for the summer so it’s not like he’s some rando old dude. And there’s no “preying,” it’s entirely consensual.

Aren’t sexual predators often trusted family members or friends? And aren’t we taught that minors cannot give consent?

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Puggo - Jar Jar’s Yoda said:

DominicCobb said:

moviefreakedmind said:

EDIT: I agree though that the parental response that you described is extremely unrealistic if that’s how it was portrayed. I haven’t seen the movie and never will.

It makes sense in context. The two are good friends well before it gets sexual. The dad knows and likes the older guy well enough to invite him to their house for the summer so it’s not like he’s some rando old dude. And there’s no “preying,” it’s entirely consensual.

Aren’t sexual predators often trusted family members or friends? And aren’t we taught that minors cannot give consent?

Of course that’s true, but there’s nothing in the film to suggest he’s a “predator.” And as I said before, in many places he is within the age of consent.

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Puggo - Jar Jar’s Yoda said:

Depends on one’s definition of “predator”. Perhaps a better term is “sexual offender”.
BTW, I never said pedophile… statutory rape is not the same thing as pedophilia.

You basically implied that the people who saw the movie with you were pedophiles.

And I looked it up, age of consent in Italy is 14, so sex offender isn’t exactly accurate.

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DominicCobb said:

Puggo - Jar Jar’s Yoda said:

Depends on one’s definition of “predator”. Perhaps a better term is “sexual offender”.
BTW, I never said pedophile… statutory rape is not the same thing as pedophilia.

You basically implied that the people who saw the movie with you were pedophiles.

It did appear to me that quite a percentage of the people in the audience fit that stereotype, whether true or not. But I don’t think I ever said that the movie was about pedophilia.

And I looked it up, age of consent in Italy is 14, so sex offender isn’t exactly accurate.

The same behavior here would be considered an offense. Although one could certainly argue that our laws, parenting, and mores therein should be changed. The father role in the film obviously believed that it was a valuable experience.

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Puggo - Jar Jar’s Yoda said:

DominicCobb said:

Puggo - Jar Jar’s Yoda said:

Depends on one’s definition of “predator”. Perhaps a better term is “sexual offender”.
BTW, I never said pedophile… statutory rape is not the same thing as pedophilia.

You basically implied that the people who saw the movie with you were pedophiles.

It did appear to me that quite a percentage of the people in the audience fit that stereotype, whether true or not. But I don’t think I ever said that the movie was about pedophilia.

Still a weird thing to say though.

And I looked it up, age of consent in Italy is 14, so sex offender isn’t exactly accurate.

The same behavior here would be considered an offense. Although one could certainly argue that our laws, parenting, and mores therein should be changed. The father role in the film obviously believed that it was a valuable experience.

I’m not saying I think we should be like Italy in this regard (in fact I think that’s definitely kinda gross). But a quick look tells me that age of consent in the US is the the large majority of the states either 16 or 17 (which is far more reasonable than in Italy).

Ultimately the numbers isn’t what’s important. It’s a coming of age film where a man who’s coming of age falls in love with a man who is a few years old than him. The dad didn’t say anything about being glad his son fell in love with a statutory rapist or whatever. It was about the transformative experience he had and the connection they shared.

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It is pedophilia plain and simple. If it had been a real life situation, of which lately there are plenty examples to choose from, between a teacher and a high school student, it would be treated like a crime, because it is a crime unless the minor in question is emancipated. I found it extremely ironic that in a year filled with sexual abuse revelations of all kinds coming to light, this movie in particular was so highly touted.

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one69chev said:

It is pedophilia plain and simple.

The term you’re looking for ephebophilia. Pedophilia is attraction to prepubescent children.

Arrivederci.

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one69chev said:

It is pedophilia plain and simple.

Technically, no, not at all.

If it had been a real life situation, of which lately there are plenty examples to choose from, between a teacher and a high school student, it would be treated like a crime, because it is a crime unless the minor in question is emancipated.

Except it’s not a teacher and a student, and it’s not a crime as I’ve stated numerous times.

I found it extremely ironic that in a year filled with sexual abuse revelations of all kinds coming to light, this movie in particular was so highly touted.

It’s almost like the movie has nothing to do with sexual abuse. Funny.

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Whether this is “abuse” is debatable – there are those who think that any sex between an adult and a minor is abuse, whether consensual or not, and regardless of who was the pursuer. There are those who think it is a grey area (probably most think that, including me). And, there are those who think the law should be a lot more permissive.

However, I found the movie’s dealing with this issue to be manipulative (to the viewer). By making the characters seem SO different in age, and by making the parents SO approving and hands off - while being portrayed as highly educated and enlightened, it made me wonder exactly what the movie’s message was supposed to be. The guy was a guest in the parents’ home, and was pretty rude and aggressive. And he was doing their son. It is very, very strange that they didn’t even question whether it was “ok”, or whether their son was even ok with it. Is the message that this is how parents should be? Is that really good?

Other similarly-themed stories include the parents being livid - or at the very least worrying, regardless of whether or not the story sympathizes with the protagonists.

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