Why we hate the prequels at OT forum. — Page 2

I don't hate TPM.  It sort of has a cohesive story (albeit a very thin one), Qui-Gon is a fantastic character played perfectly by Liam Neeson, Darth Maul was a good villain, and the climactic lightsaber duel was pretty freakin' sweet.  It feels the most complete of all three.

But Jar Jar, Anakin as a nine-year-old, Yoda looking like crap and serving no purpose in the story, large sections of the movie being unnecessary (Otoh Gunga, anyone?), and a huge portion of a Star Wars film being devoted to a race sour it quite a bit.  Add to that the fact that the only function it serves in the overall Star Wars narrative is that Obi-Wan and Anakin meet, and Obi-Wan kinda-sorta-but-not-really decides to train him.  It didn't feel important enough.

AOTC I definitely hate.  It's a murder mystery that goes nowhere.  There are hints at a more compelling larger story that never pay off.  Boba Fett's character is completely ruined.  Anakin is a annoying, whiny bastard.  Yoda uses a lightsaber (and hops around like a frog), and "Count Dooku" (aka biggest missed opportunity in the prequels) uses Force lightning ... twice.  The Clone Wars start but it doesn't really make much sense.  It looked less like a movie and more like a video game.

AOTC serves two purposes: Anakin and Padme fall in love (boring, and takes up most of the movie), and the Clone Wars begin (at the end of the movie).

It's the worst of the three.

ROTS, I don't hate.  I generally dislike it, but can't hate it because there are great moments, such as the whole Order 66 sequence, and the birth of Darth Vader sequence (not talking about Anakin's turn, here).

But it's biggest problem is that most of the "bullet points" the PT needed to hit are crammed into this one film.

Let's see.  Anakin turns evil?  Check.  Anakin gets injured and put in the Vader suit?  Check.  The Empire takes over?  Check.  All the Jedi get killed?  Check.  Yoda goes into hiding?  Check.  Luke and Leia are born?  Check.  Obi-Wan goes to Tatooine with Luke?  Check.  Obi-Wan changes his name to Ben?  Check.  Leia goes to Alderaan?  Check.  The Clone Wars end?  Check.  The Rebellion is born?  I could say "check," as those scenes were filmed, but I can't because they were cut.  The freakin' Death Star begins construction?  Check.

Did I miss anything?  Probably.  There's just too much stuff happening in this film.  On top of the stuff the PT needed to cover (most of which could have been spread out across all three films), there's stuff it didn't need to cover, as well.  It makes the movie feel fragmented, not like it has its own story.  It relies on the overall saga even more than Empire does.

And on top of that, all but, what, 2 scenes in the film are almost entirely CG with the exception of what live actors are present?

It's funny, because while I don't hate ROTS, it's the one that disheartened me the most.  Because in it, I saw all the potential the whole goddamn trilogy had, yet it was all squandered in favor of two films where almost nothing important happened.  That's why I haven't been able to finish it since I saw it in theaters (the only one I saw once in theaters, too).

So there you have it.  Those are my primary problems with the prequels, mixed in with some things I like about them.  I have a lot more problems, but I'll spare you the multi-page list.

The Phantom Menace - I remember repeating to my self "What the fuck is this" the whole time I've been in the movie theatre. I couldn't understand what's going on. Simply a lot of things happened and none of them left any emotional impact on me.

In other words, I didn't care about the characters. The only things I DID care about were - how will Amidala look when she gets bigger tits, when will Anakin and Jar Jar die, why does Liam Neeson look like a crappy actor, why is Yoda in the movie ?

I still don't understand that movie. Too many things are happening for no apparent reason. This movie needs a complete re-edit. Add a scene how did the Jedi get to Naboo, drop the Gungan city, add the waterfall sequence, drop the podrace, etc etc etc.

Attack Of The Clones - the only movie from the prequels which I REALLY like. It has many illogical parts, many plot holes, and the love story was way too long, but it was a fun action movie just like the original trilogy. I still like it.

The third one (I can't remember the title right now) - I would call it "colourful shit". I remember it was "red". The only SW movie I didn't buy on DVD. I remember only how I hated absolutely everything about this movie. Terrible script, terrible acting, terrible editing (where the f* are the rebellion scenes ?), terrible CGI ... and especially terribly written scene where Anakin turns into Darth Vader

pittrek said:

In other words, I didn't care about the characters. The only things I DID care about were - how will Amidala look when she gets bigger tits...

Sheesh.

TV's Frink said:

pittrek said:

In other words, I didn't care about the characters. The only things I DID care about were - how will Amidala look when she gets bigger tits...

Sheesh.

Well I was 17 :-)

Jacobss said:

But still she didn't get much bigger tits in the next two movies. Natalie Portman has no tits, sadly.

Sheesh again.  Are you 17 now?

Tits are gay.

Ladies feel comfortable with them but not if they are too big and scary.

Many men are attracted to them but are pressured into denial.

They are all over the media, they are often seen barely contained by tight Lycra.

In special bars they will spin around festooned with tassels and sequins.

Uptight religious groups openly oppose them coming out in public.

Your honour...I rest my case.

TIE BOMBER!!! CHECK IT OUT!!!! TIE BOMBER!!!!

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In AOTC, as ObiWan is investigating the attempted assassination of Queen Kabuki, he discovers that a long-dead Republic official has ordered an army of clones [made by a whole RACE of "cloners"--yes, races are so stereotyped they uniformly enter into the identical technical trade!].

When asked by the Council whether the cloners might have anything to do with the attempt, he replies, "No, there's no motive."

Uuuuh, but what about the $8O GAGILLION ARMY SALE DEAL you JUST DISCOVERED that might have been scuttled by the Senator-Queen's public "No" vote on building an "Army of the Republic"?

Oh, yeah, and her expected vote was why he had been detailed as her security in the first place.  Yeah.  But the army itself?  No motive there!

So this is revealed as a back-story point, but it's blatant relevance to the actual PLOT is simply unappreciated by the character.

It shows a profound and baffling lack of the writer's (ostensibly Lucas's) ability to inhabit the world he's created on its own terms.

While the audience was asleep presumably.

Doesn't he change his name aboard the Tantive IV while talking to Bail and Yoda?

Don't forget, I haven't gotten that far into the movie since I saw it in theaters 5 years ago.

I remember the speculation that Obi-Wan was a first generation clone of the original Ben Kenobi (original batch one -OB1 ya dig?).

Erikstormtrooper said:

ChainsawAsh said:

Obi-Wan changes his name to Ben?  Check.  Leia goes to Alderaan?  Check.

When did this happen in the movie?

Yes, Leia goes to Alderaan at the end of ROTS.  But I can guarantee no reference is ever made to "Ben Kenobi" in the PT, and I should know.

I stand corrected.  Maybe I'll do a marathon of all 3 PT films this weekend, just to torture myself (and come up with more reasons why I don't like them).

Hey, I loved Jedi Power Battles!  I actually still have it, and played with a friend a couple weeks ago.  It's harder than I remember.