("We are the Champions" plays)
Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. MPEG Streamclip was the program I needed. I used Streamclip to export to Quicktime PhotoJPEG (it was even able to lower the color saturation slightly, which was something I wanted to try) - and then take it into Cinema Tools to IVTC it.
I'll just repeat this for the whole movie. It'll take a while, but result in gorgeous 24p.