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The Rise of Skywalker: Ascendant (Released) — Page 528

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 (Edited)

What if a line was added?

Palpatine: “The Jedi are dead! I am all the Sith! A scavenger girl is no match for the power in me, you are nothing.”

Rey: “No… I’m a Jedi.”

Or:

Palpatine: “Laughing… I am all the Sith! A scavenger girl is no match for the power in me, you are nothing.”

Rey: “No… I’m a Jedi.”

The Skywalker Saga:
I / II / III / IV / V / VI / VII / VIII / IX
This is the way.

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sherlockpotter said:

Cap is still helping me track down some more instances of Rey saying “I am” to help smooth over that transition (thank you, Cap!!); but in the meantime, I wanted to get back into the scene after stepping away from it for a bit. If it’s not 100% yet, that’s fine - hopefully we’ll be able to use some of the new clips - but for now, I have it with Sade’s Palpy dialogue rearrangement, the added Rey pant as before, and a new cut of “am a Jedi.” The big thing I’m curious about for this test: I also tweaked the video somewhat to see if I could fudge the lip sync at all, so I’d love feedback on that!

https://streamable.com/l4ugyw

I think it looks and sounds great!

I feel the pacing, the delivery and the ideas flow the best with this rearrangement of the dialogue. Basically he first tells her “You are nothing, I am everything”. Then to rub it in he calls her a scavenger.

If Palps last line was “I am all the Sith” then the only appropiate response for Rey would be “I’m all the Jedi”, basically countering “I have the power of all the Sith inside me” with “I have the power of all the Jedi who stand behind me”. But switching the last line to calling her a scavenger is brilliant because now it’s personal, it speaks to her own self-doubt, and now the appropiate response for Rey is to take the courage to call herself a Jedi.

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 (Edited)

I don’t think “scavenger” being the last line works as well as a back-and-forth, though.

If Palpatine’s last line is “I am all the Sith” and Rey says “and I am all the Jedi,” then she’s following up his boast with her own (corny as it may be), and if his last line is “You are nothing” and she says “no, I am a Jedi,” then she’s refuting him and asserting herself. But if Palpatine says “a scavenger girl is not match for me” and Rey’s direct response is “and I am a Jedi,” it sounds odd, almost like they’re having two different conversations.

That’s why I think trying to get “nothing” in as the last line would be worth more investigation, because it also has that personal touch for Rey, arguably moreso. She’s always known she’s a scavenger (and she doesn’t get emotional when Poe brings it up in the same movie), but being called “nothing” by a dark sider specifically touches on her emotional low-point from the last movie and her core insecurity.

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I don’t think the delivery of “You are nothing” works as Palp’s final line. And I think “scavenger” is just as personal, even more so since Palps could tell anyone “You are nothing”, but he’s specifically telling her she’s still just a scavenger, not worthy of calling herself a Jedi, but she’s refutes him and asserts herself just as you said.

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Burbin said:

sherlockpotter said:

Cap is still helping me track down some more instances of Rey saying “I am” to help smooth over that transition (thank you, Cap!!); but in the meantime, I wanted to get back into the scene after stepping away from it for a bit. If it’s not 100% yet, that’s fine - hopefully we’ll be able to use some of the new clips - but for now, I have it with Sade’s Palpy dialogue rearrangement, the added Rey pant as before, and a new cut of “am a Jedi.” The big thing I’m curious about for this test: I also tweaked the video somewhat to see if I could fudge the lip sync at all, so I’d love feedback on that!

https://streamable.com/l4ugyw

I think it looks and sounds great!

I feel the pacing, the delivery and the ideas flow the best with this rearrangement of the dialogue. Basically he first tells her “You are nothing, I am everything”. Then to rub it in he calls her a scavenger.

If Palps last line was “I am all the Sith” then the only appropiate response for Rey would be “I’m all the Jedi”, basically countering “I have the power of all the Sith inside me” with “I have the power of all the Jedi who stand behind me”. But switching the last line to calling her a scavenger is brilliant because now it’s personal, it speaks to her own self-doubt, and now the appropiate response for Rey is to take the courage to call herself a Jedi.

Thanks, man!

If memory serves, Sade did put together a version that ended with the “You are nothing” line; but exactly as Burbin said, we felt that the pacing and flow of the dialogue was best with this version. Structurally, sure, “You are nothing.” “I am a Jedi.” It makes sense; but it just didn’t flow as well for whatever reason. And I also agree with Burbin that it’s kind of fun, looking at the whole trilogy, to say “You’re just a scavenger.” “Not anymore, bitch. Now I’m a Jedi!” It basically sums up Rey’s whole journey in two lines.


I’d be down for trying “No…I am a Jedi,” but we’d have to find a good instance of her saying the word. This scene has proven to be surprisingly difficult for getting Daisy’s tone to sound correct.

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I think making palpy’s last line “you are nothing, a scavenger girl …” Would be the best option, but putting the I am all the sith line at the front doesn’t really feel right as it does feel like it belongs at the end, but that might just be because I’ve heard the original so many times. What if you just removed the I am all the sith line, or at least moved it to a different scene to keep the evil spirit thing intact? I guess it would take a little away from that final scene but it might sound better. If not then I agree that ending with you are nothing makes more sense for Rey’s response.

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 (Edited)

sherlockpotter said:

If memory serves, Sade did put together a version that ended with the “You are nothing” line; but exactly as Burbin said, we felt that the pacing and flow of the dialogue was best with this version.

To be fair, Sade also said in that same conversation that “I am a Jedi” wouldn’t feel climactic and that it probably couldn’t work believably. And the main criticism people had of his mock-up of “nothing” was that it didn’t work well in the specific shot he moved the line, which I agree with and am not necessarily proposing, and that there was too much dead air at the beginning of the scene without its original placement (which might be fixable, but maybe not).

sherlockpotter said:

And I also agree with Burbin that it’s kind of fun, looking at the whole trilogy, to say “You’re just a scavenger.” “Not anymore, bitch. Now I’m a Jedi!”

If he were actually saying “you’re just a scavenger” I’d agree, but the way he says it is “a scavenger girl is no match for the power in me.” That statement is more of a declaration rather than directly addressing Rey in conversation, and Rey’s response doesn’t address him directly either (as “Not anymore, bitch” would, lol). I just think that if I saw that ordering in the theater, I would think they accidentally cut a sentence out of the middle of the conversation.

As for her saying “No…,” I think following up “scavenger” or “nothing” with Rey saying “And…” doesn’t really make sense, because it means she’s not actually rejecting either of those things. If the final Palpatine line isn’t “sith,” something needs to be done about “And…,” whether it’s “No…” or something else.

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Hmmm, I get both sides of it and will say, this is already an improvement than what the original movie did. I don’t necessarily disagree with Neerb’s take that Palps last line to her isn’t a straight up “personally speaking” by saying it broadly as “a scavenger girl …” as opposed to him saying it like “your just a scavenger girl …”

Although not sure if it is possible or doable to do a lip sync or whatever to change her first sound to “no” (The first kinda grunty “I’m”) which then goes to her “I’m a jedi.” So that way it is more of a response to Palps labeling her as “just a scavenger girl” then just a statement that isn’t 100% connected with the exchange.

Again, it is already much better than what’s there, but I can see if it is possible to do that, it could help it? Maybe?

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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Neerb said:

sherlockpotter said:

And I also agree with Burbin that it’s kind of fun, looking at the whole trilogy, to say “You’re just a scavenger.” “Not anymore, bitch. Now I’m a Jedi!”

If he were actually saying “you’re just a scavenger” I’d agree, but the way he says it is “a scavenger girl is no match for the power in me.” That statement is more of a declaration rather than directly addressing Rey in conversation, and Rey’s response doesn’t address him directly either (as “Not anymore, bitch” would, lol). I just think that if I saw that ordering in the theater, I would think they accidentally cut a sentence out of the middle of the conversation.

It is less in-your-face than most of this script, I grant you. (MAZ: “Hey audience: Leia’s about to kill herself, in case you can’t pick up on context clues!”) But to me, it still works. It’s almost like Palpatine doesn’t care about her enough to give her much thought. “You’re just a scavenger. Look at how powerful I am. Focus on meeee!!” And Rey’s all like, “Excuse me (bitch), I am a Jedi. Maybe you’ll notice me when I LIGHTNING YOUR FACE!” It’s a bit more subtextual, but I don’t think that’s a bad thing.

As for her saying “No…,” I think following up “scavenger” or “nothing” with Rey saying “And…” doesn’t really make sense, because it means she’s not actually rejecting either of those things. If the final Palpatine line isn’t “sith,” something needs to be done about “And…,” whether it’s “No…” or something else.

I tried to address the “and” in my edit.

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I agree that Rey responding to Palpatine either calling her nothing or a scavenger by stating she is a Jedi is the best thing, thematically. It’s the literal culmination of her character arcs - in TFA she hates being a lowly scavenger, in TLJ she hates that she’s a nobody in her own story. By the end of TROS, she has dealt with those things and become (in Joseph Campbell’s terms) the Master of Both Worlds, which in the SW universe has always meant being a Jedi.

Meanwhile, Palpatine being all the Sith is kind of irrelevant to anything meaningful across the trilogy.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

The Rise of Skywalker Expanded Edition by Rae Carson: The Faraday Edit, The Last Jedi: Stoic Edition, Revenge of the Sith: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Godzilla Vs Megalon, The Light Rises, Faraday Junior’s Star Wars

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The issue is what is possible with the footage as we have it.

Well done. I will disengage self-destruct initiative.

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 (Edited)

Yeah, as HAL says, the issue is the footage. There’s no close-up footage of Palpatine saying “You’re nothing” like there is for the other two lines, which makes it very difficult to put last, because in order to cut to Rey for the end of the dialogue sequence we need to be cutting from somewhere else, and that somewhere else essentially has to be a closeup of Palpatine’s face. That’s why when I tried it in my mockup, I had to put the “you are nothing” line over the top of that footage of Rey - you can’t put it over the other Palpatine closeups, because the lipsync would be severely wrong, and you can’t use the wide shot it was originally over because that doesn’t lead into Rey recoiling from lightning correctly, etc.

Music can also be an issue: making the sequence significantly shorter means hiding a trim to the music somewhere (not super straightforward with the iconic Emperor motif), and even rearranging shots means harming how well that music syncs up to the action - assuming you can even manage to separate the music out from the sound effects in the first place (though this isn’t a total deal breaker if you’re willing to really go deep with reconstructing the sound mix and rescoring).

I think this thread has something of tendency to focus too much on the written text of a scene without checking the movie for whether it’s feasible. I’ve seen people (and not just Testing) repeatedly suggest materialising fairly complex new lines entirely out of thin air, even. You don’t need to actually be able to edit to ‘test’ your idea, you can just load up the movie, take stock of what shot coverage you’ve got and see in your mind if you could theoretically put it together or not. Many a good fanediting idea dies at the stage of realising you just haven’t got the right footage to pull it off.

Neerb said:

To be fair, Sade also said in that same conversation that “I am a Jedi” wouldn’t feel climactic and that it probably couldn’t work believably.

To clarify, I was splitting the hairs between the somewhat trepidatiously-delivered “I’m… I’m a Jedi.” (which is what my mockups had) and the theoretical grand, defiant “I am a Jedi!” which I got the impression a lot of people were imagining. Achieving the latter line delivery would require a total replacement of the line using clips from elsewhere, as far as I can see. I do very much think “I’m a Jedi”, either my implementation of it or Sherlock’s, does work far better than “I am all the Jedi” ever did.

I was never 100% happy with my execution of that audio edit, but we’re all very critical of ourselves, especially when we’ve listened to the same audio clip hundreds of times. I mean, I still intend to use my version of that change in my own TROS fanedit; I didn’t mean to suggest it was unusable or anything.

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Well put. While we’ve transcended certain traditional constraints, we’re still tethered to reality.

Well done. I will disengage self-destruct initiative.

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sherlockpotter said:

I tried to address the “and” in my edit.

Ah, I thought I was still hearing a full “And I,” but listening again I guess I’m hearing more of a “nI” now. Is it possible to cut the start of her audio a bit closer to the I, or is it basically as cut as it can be for now without alternate sources for the “I” sound? Or is the “n” at the start needed as a sort of grunt to match her lips in the moment?

Or maybe it’s just my ears playing tricks on me at this point. I’m sure we’ve all rewatched TROS more times than a person ever should.

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Did a little more smoothing out on “I” and “am a.” Is it any better?

Also, maybe I’ve watched this clip too many times, but what if Palps says, “I am all the Sith. You are nothing. A scavenger girl is no match for the power in me.” Sade, you’re the expert - did we try it that way already? Would it make any significant difference to the scene?

Hell if I know.

https://streamable.com/81qs12

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sherlockpotter said:

Did a little more smoothing out on “I” and “am a.” Is it any better?

Also, maybe I’ve watched this clip too many times, but what if Palps says, “I am all the Sith. You are nothing. A scavenger girl is no match for the power in me.” Sade, you’re the expert - did we try it that way already? Would it make any significant difference to the scene?

Hell if I know.

https://streamable.com/81qs12

Didn’t heard it in a while, but i think it is close to fluid. I would think it’s a natural swallowing of the „i“ before „am a jedi“ (i’m no english native speaker).

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sherlockpotter said:

Did a little more smoothing out on “I” and “am a.” Is it any better?

Also, maybe I’ve watched this clip too many times, but what if Palps says, “I am all the Sith. You are nothing. A scavenger girl is no match for the power in me.” Sade, you’re the expert - did we try it that way already? Would it make any significant difference to the scene?

Hell if I know.

https://streamable.com/81qs12

lol i dont know why, but i thought it was funny at the end of the clip it zoomed in on palp’s face. but in all seriousness, I’m not sure if it truly matters if switching the “i am all the sith, u are nothing, a scavenger girl is no match for the power in me”. The “I am a jedi” line seems fluid. Though is there any way to stretch out the “am a jedi” part? funny because taking out the word “all” makes the line feel shorter and the nuance diminishes slightly imo.

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Bro it looks/sounds good to me Sherlock. Dang.

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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It’s sound genuinly good, anything past that would be just perfecting and improving what’s already good.
If the “a” in the “I’m a” could be a little more clear it be better, but if it’s not possibly, it already works very well.

the dark side of the force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural

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Jar Jar Bricks said:

With the latest Bad Batch episode (light spoiler) it seems like it’s canon that those experimental cloning tubes are filled with green liquid. Are we going to stick with the red or is green a possibility? I seem to remember Poppa making two different versions.

I believe this is the version

The Skywalker Saga:
I / II / III / IV / V / VI / VII / VIII / IX
This is the way.

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 (Edited)

Speaking of Palpatine clones, I suggest changing them so they all look different from each other but in their own unique, mutilated ways, although one closely resembles Snoke but with some of Palpatine’s facial features — adds to the inference that Palpatine is horrible at manufacturing lifeforms, hence why his body is decaying and deteriorating, and why he can’t just make an entire army of Snokes.

EDIT: Also, make the clones in question dead, implying that Palps’ clone vessel and Snoke himself were barely successes.

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Omg can we not do spoilers. Literally waiting to get home to watch show and things are being spoiled/revealed on a non bad batch spoiler thread?

I don’t have many pet peeves, but this is one.

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”