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The Last Jedi: Stoic Edition (WIP)

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 (Edited)

Currently being worked on:

  • Investigate giving Rose’s new line to Finn, depending on dialogue options available.
  • Film new background plate to match DJ’s jacket for the plomme bloom insert shot.
  • Fix the frame skipping in the opening crawl.
  • Update my document of dialogue changes, since it no longer accurately matches the changes in the edit.

Intention

The Last Jedi is a film with great ideas and themes that it doesn’t communicate clearly. This is such an issue that its critics tend to think it’s saying the opposite of what it’s actually saying - for instance, the film actually says Luke is wrong to want the Jedi to end, Kylo is wrong to say the past should die, and that Luke is only right when he embraces the cool epic hero version of himself. It’s a movie which celebrates Luke facing down the entire First Order armed with a laser sword, not a movie that derides it. So why do so many people receive the opposite message?

This confusion arises because the dialogue is so over-written. Characters state the themes and even over-explain them, but because they say so much other unnecessary dialogue at the same time, it all gets lost in the shuffle. It’s so overwhelming that it even obfuscates the strong visual storytelling that would otherwise make these things clear.

There are also a few times where the pacing lags, making some moments feel slightly weird and making certain parts of the film feel like they’re much longer than they actually are. I’ve trimmed these moments to fix the pacing, making moments land the way they’re meant to and keeping the film moving.

The Stoic Edition is my attempt to rip out all of the unnecessary dialogue and over-explanation that plagues the film, resulting in a sharply written movie with a lot of great visual storytelling, that could believably have been released in cinemas by Disney in 2017. My goal is not to alter what the film is saying, but to polish how it says it. If you hate The Last Jedi, this edit will hopefully illuminate what the people who love it are seeing.

Guiding Philosophy

This edit is focused on strengthening the core themes of each of the movie’s subplots, which I see as the following:

  • Failure is part of life; we can either learn from it, or let it destroy us. (Luke and the Jedi Order; Finn and Rose.)
  • Loving fictional stories is valid and can inspire us to take real action. (Luke and Rey.)
  • Caring about things and being earnest is good; apathy and being cynical is bad. (Finn and DJ.)
  • The cause is greater than any individual; you can believe in the cause even if you don’t get along with every individual who supports it. (Poe and Holdo.)
  • People aren’t always who you expect; their actions, not their words, determine who they are. (Poe and Holdo, Rey and Kylo, Finn and Rose and DJ.)
  • The meta-theme that runs through the whole movie is that the old Star Wars movies (which if you’re a character in Star Wars, are your past history) are good and that Star Wars fans (ie, Rey and the Resistance) are correct to love Star Wars and to want Classic Luke back. Meanwhile, cynical Kylo Ren wants to leave the past behind (aka, he’s the kind of person who thinks Star Wars is lame and complains about fans for earnestly liking things) and he’s ultimately left by himself screaming in rage to nobody while the Star Wars fans fly off to do more Star Wars together. The Last Jedi is the biggest love letter to Star Wars fans for being Star Wars fans, but it’s so stifled in its execution that a lot of Star Wars fans think it’s criticising them for liking Star Wars.

Editing details:

  • I initially started working with the theatrical cut, but then I realised I wanted to make almost all of the same cuts as Hal 9000’s Legendary Edition, so I switched to Legendary as my primary source (especially helpful for editing because it has 5.1 surround sound). I reinstated parts by patching over areas with the theatrical cut.
  • I’ve written a changelog below, but I haven’t included any of the extensive dialogue cuts and edits. Instead, here’s a link to a dialogue transcript with the cuts highlighted in red.
  • I’ve edited in 720p DVD quality, because that’s what my computer can handle rendering. I’ve also used a 1080p BluRay source for select shots I wanted to reframe.
  • The amount of technical trickery that went into the dialogue cuts was unexpectedly huge. The Last Jedi has an extremely busy soundscape, with almost literally constant music, a sound effect for every onscreen movement, and unique atmos tracks for every location change, no matter how minor (ie. a spaceship corridor and the next room in the same spaceship). Dialogue often covers multiple audio channels, frequently all of them. (It’s a work of art in its own right, just as beautiful as the cinematography people like to praise; despite being so busy, it never gets intrusive, and often isn’t even noticeable - and it’s all there to contextualise the few moments of silence sprinkled through the movie, and make them all the more powerful. It’s great, but it makes it a pain to edit.) As a result, I had to reconstruct some atmos tracks from minuscule beats between other sounds, and a few times, I had to scrap all of the audio and record new atmos and sound effects myself.

Major changes:

  • Dialogue has been extensively trimmed, as explained.
  • WIP: DJ was the Master Codebreaker Maz sent them to find. It supports the theme that sometimes you’ll have to work with people you don’t like, as well as the theme that people aren’t always who you expect. In a practical sense, it also streamlines Finn’s subplot and makes it easier to follow.
  • If I was to do a V2: Redubbing Holdo’s dialogue with a new actor, solely for the purpose of writing new dialogue for a few lines when her face is off-camera. (There’s a bunch of shots of very obvious ADR in the theatrical cut, so I figure if Rian can do it, then so can I.) Poe and Holdo’s subplot was the hardest one to work with; I’ll talk about it more in the comments if people are interested, to avoid turning this dot point into an essay.

Changelog:

  • Extensively trimmed, pruned, removed, and reorganised dialogue throughout the entire movie. See this document for a full list of changes to the dialogue. I haven’t explained my reasoning behind every alteration or the document would be a dozen pages long, but they’re all in service to the clarification of the themes I outlined above.
  • Since my vocal cameo has been removed (I was going to voice the Abednego), I gave myself a visual cameo instead, somewhere in the movie. See if you can spot me.
  • New opening crawl, slightly altering the first and last paragraph, courtesy of SparkySywer.
  • Minimised Tali’s presence and removed all introductions to the bombing fleet personnel - it’s more important to focus on Paige in this sequence.
  • Removed the Resistance bomber blowing up its friend with debris when it explodes; it makes the ships look like they’re made of paper and Acme TNT plungers.
  • Replaced the cut to black when Paige falls with a brief flash to white and an ear-ringing sound. Cutting to black implies a time skip and ruins the momentum of the scene.
  • Trimmed Paige grabbing the detonator.
  • Used poppasketti’s audio to change Luke tossing the lightsaber (Hal).
  • Removed random insert shots of stuff in Luke’s hut; the scene cuts directly to his robes being folded.
  • Reinstated the deleted scene where Finn gets his jacket from Poe, with scene transition by poppasketti and pleasehello (Hal).
  • Removed distracting insert shot of contemporary-looking water bottle.
  • Removed Leia slapping Poe. That’s not how a good leader would act, not to mention it’s a double-standard; imagine if Han slapped Rey for something in TFA.
  • Reinstated the “Luke Has A Moment” deleted scene (Hal).
  • Removed sea creature’s weird snort at Rey. It makes it feel like it’s sapient, which is narrowly on the wrong side of how off-putting the milk drinking scene is meant to be.
  • Added wide shot from Biomes to imply passage of time on Ahch-To while Rey is following Luke.
  • Cut Kylo trying spinning because it’s a good trick.
  • Made the explosion hitting the bridge more rapid and intense, so Leia doesn’t stand there awkwardly for a second in the explosion.
  • Made the shot of Smiling Luke recognising R2 into a closeup. It’s not much, but we need to see that this Luke is still in there somewhere, so we can anticipate him re-emerging later.
  • Added a new line for C-3PO, reacting to news of Admiral Ackbar’s demise, courtesy of DMC.
  • Added new Abednego subtitle in response to Poe’s confusion about Holdo, to try and recontextualise some of Holdo’s more abrasive attributes and actions, using new audio courtesy of ThisIsCreation.
  • Tightened the timing on Rose drawing her stun taser.
  • Tightened the timing on Rose stunning Finn, and the oddly long pause before the scene transition.
  • Force Skype conversations: dialogue extensively trimmed. Only one line is spoken in the first one, which breaks the connection; in the second they manage to hold a short conversation; by the third, they can communicate freely; in the fourth, they touch hands.
  • Cut the Caretakers using a VFX shot by snooker (Hal). The nifty symbolism of Luke literally living in the crumbling ruins of an ancient ideal is destroyed by having fish nuns still doing upkeep around the place (as much as I personally like their design and think they’re funny).
  • Cut the Robot Chicken style joke where Luke tickles Rey’s hand.
  • Removed reference to Luke cutting himself off from the Force. This is such a massive idea that the KOTOR games were completely centred on exploring it, and here it’s tossed out as a throwaway explanation for something that doesn’t even need one. Having the Force was never like having a GPS tracker on you in the OT, so why would we suddenly need a reason that Leia and Snoke haven’t been able to find Luke with the Force?
  • WIP: The trio are running back out of the casino because BB-8 has told them the shuttle’s being towed. The man at the craps table is simply a wealthy background character with no introductory music, whose indifference to them being electrocuted and dragged off serves to highlight the idea that none of the rich one-percenters even give a second’s thought about what happens to the lower classes.
  • WIP: DJ has a red plomme bloom on his lapel in an insert shot; Rose and Finn notice it and exclaim “The Master Codebreaker!” after watching him casually slice his way out of the cell.
  • Canto Bight extensively trimmed down. No fathier escape; we go straight from the cell to the stolen ship (Hal).
  • Luke’s second lesson has been pruned to focus on his opinion that the Jedi’s legacy is failure, and so is his own.
  • Rashomon flashbacks: As these are unreliably-narrated subjective memories rather than flashbacks to the actual events, a smash to black and fade in has been added to help differentiate them out from the rest of the movie.
  • No shirtless Kylo japes. He just happens to not be wearing a shirt now.
  • Truncated the Cave sequence, so now Rey just snaps her fingers once to test it out - no unnecessary hand waving and multiple clicking. I also removed all dialogue from the sequence.
  • WIP: Luke deactivates his lightsaber immediately in the third flashback; he doesn’t realise Kylo is awake and hears it. VFX shot courtesy of SparkySywer.
  • Removed Rey’s clunky twirl in her fight with Luke.
  • Removed iron/spaceship gag, using a deleted scene restored by poppasketti (Hal).
  • Trimmed comedy about BB-8 being put under a trash can (Hal).
  • Punched in on elevator wide shot to clarify the geography of where the two sets of characters are in frame.
  • DJ doesn’t return the Hasian Smelt. Why would he? The whole point of his character is that he only looks out for himself.
  • Restructured scenes to combine the the throne room scene into one singular scene. This facilitates a greater buildup of tension, as well as a less melodramatic and more sinister version of Snoke’s mind-probe (inspired by Peregrine’s “The End of the Jedi” edit).
  • Used poppasketti’s editing of the buildup to Snoke’s death using musical score from The Force Awakens (Hal).
  • Tightened the pacing on the Throne Fight where possible.
  • Removed Finn’s fight scene with Phasma, using VFX shots by poppasketti (Hal).
  • Reinstated deleted scene of Finn and Rose leaving in the shuttle, using VFX by poppasketti (Hal).
  • Moved Yoda’s scene to immediately before the Battle of Crait, using audio and video by Darthrush (Hal).
  • Removed references to Leia being a rallying point for people. The whole point is that the galaxy doesn’t have such a thing, and Luke arrives on Crait and gives them one.
  • Truncated the Battle of Crait, keeping the battle short and focused on the main trio. The theatrical version asks for too much audience investment in establishing the battle, and this much new set-up feels out of place during what is now moving into the denouement of the story. The audience needs to save that level of investment for the Luke and Kylo fight.
  • Extremely truncated the Falcon flying underground. Now it just loses the TIEs and smashes back out.
  • Removed the awkward kiss between Finn and Rose. There aren’t any romantic undertones in their story arc so it comes out of nowhere, and Finn doesn’t actually look particularly pleased about it.
  • The crate Luke sits on on Crait (what a sentence) now remains motionless, thanks to VFX by poppasketti (Hal).
  • Using audio I trimmed from earlier in the film, C-3PO now utters a small exclamation which Luke winks at, implying 3PO can see that Luke isn’t really there without giving the twist away to a first-time viewer. Then he responds with “Master Luke…” in that great combination of admiration and mild admonition that Anthony Daniels delivered it with.
  • Replaced Hux’s silly comedy scream when Kylo throws him inside the shuttle with a less distracting yell.
  • Trimmed the unnecessarily long shot of Kylo’s shuttle landing in front of Luke.
  • Restructured scenes to combine the Luke vs Kylo duel into one scene. The theatrical cut makes it feel like they say one line each and then stand there for a few minutes, doing and saying nothing, while the Resistance escape.
  • Removed weird slow-motion insert shots and screams from the otherwise tight-paced, Kurosawa-feeling Luke vs Kylo duel.
  • Punched in on Luke on Ahch-To, to make it more immediately clear what we’re looking at.
  • Cut the Broom Boy scene from the ending, instead irising out on the small spark of the Resistance that the whole film has been about saving as they bond in the Falcon.

Samples:

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars

Author
Time

The Last Jedi is a film with great ideas and themes that it doesn’t communicate clearly.

They don’t explicitly communicate them to avoid needless spoonfeeding. Imagine if J.J. explicitly had Kylo go up to the camera and spoonfeed us that he was injured and bleeding and that was why he lost to Rey.

Removed Tali and all introductions to the bombing fleet personnel - it’s more important to focus on Paige in this sequence.

It’s there to add weight to when Tallie and the others — some of Poe’s friends — are killed in the ambush.

Removed random insert shots of stuff in Luke’s hut; the scene cuts directly to his robes being folded.

It’s an establishing shot telling us that we’re inside “some kind of building”.

Reinstated the deleted scene where Finn gets his jacket from Poe, with scene transition by poppasketti and pleasehello (Hal).

It’s redundant. We don’t need to push it down our throats that Finn has to fight for the cause.

Removed Leia slapping Poe. That’s not how a good leader would act, not to mention it’s a double-standard; imagine if Han slapped Rey for something in TFA.

The difference is that Poe caused mass genocide.

Reinstated the “Luke Has A Moment” deleted scene (Hal).

I also think it’s redundant. It can be already be inferred he’s mourning Han in the Falcon scene.

Force Skype conversations: dialogue extensively trimmed. Only one line is spoken in the first one, which breaks the connection; in the second they manage to hold a short conversation; by the third, they can communicate freely; in the fourth, they touch hands.

Scene 1 re-establishes Rey saw Han as a father figure, foreshadows Luke’s death and (re-)establishes Kylo’s relationship with Luke. Don’t remember too much about Scene 2.

Cut the Robot Chicken style joke where Luke tickles Rey’s hand.

It’s to show that Rey is naive, especially when it comes to the Force.

Removed reference to Luke cutting himself off from the Force. This is such a massive idea that the KOTOR games were completely centred on exploring it, and here it’s tossed out as a throwaway explanation for something that doesn’t even need one. Having the Force was never like having a GPS tracker on you in the OT, so why would we suddenly need a reason that Leia and Snoke haven’t been able to find Luke with the Force?

Luke doesn’t want to use the Force anymore. He thinks he, himself, will make things worse. It also explains how he didn’t sense Han’s death and the NR’s destruction.

Luke’s first lesson has been pruned to focus on his opinion that the Jedi’s legacy is failure, and so is his own.

If you’re referring to the lesson about the light, that was to show that the light would still exist, even if the Jedi die off. Luke believes the galaxy doesn’t NEED the Jedi.

No shirtless Kylo japes. He just happens to not be wearing a shirt now.

It’s to show that Rey is actually seeing Kylo and not just sensing him.

Luke deactivates his lightsaber immediately in the third flashback; he doesn’t realise Kylo is awake and hears it, . VFX shot courtesy of SparkySywer.

He keeps it on because he was ashamed of what he was doing. It’s like in ROTJ when he sees his hand after catching himself harming Vader.

Removed iron/spaceship gag, using a deleted scene restored by poppasketti (Hal).

Then how are you going to explain how or where they got FO uniforms?

Used poppasketti’s editing of the buildup to Snoke’s death using musical score from The Force Awakens (Hal).

Snoke’s hubris blinds him from realizing Kylo was gonna kill him.

Removed the awkward kiss between Finn and Rose. There aren’t any romantic undertones in their story arc so it comes out of nowhere, and Finn doesn’t actually look particularly pleased about it.

That’s the point. Finn is so caught up in Rey he doesn’t realize Rose loves him, and even he rejects her because she sexually harassed him, which also reinforces that he’s still into Rey, even WITH caring for the cause.

Cut the Broom Boy scene from the ending, instead irising out on the small spark of the Resistance that the whole film has been about saving as they bond in the Falcon.

This removes the point of the movie - Luke’s sacrifice inspires hope in times of hopelessness. This also removes foreshadowing for the galaxy rallying on Exegol.

Author
Time

All of the changes and trims you’re making make perfect sense to me; I’m excited to see how it turns out! I can see how the proposed edits will help to assist the movie in conveying the themes effectively, without having to spell it out for the viewer.

In terms of the things you need help with, I’m not super skilled with editing, but I’ll be happy to help where I can!

I am no Jedi

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NeverarGreat said:

Impressive write-up! This might help separate music from dialogue if you’re interested.

I believe this film really wants to be a meditation on the Force, and it looks like you’re allowing it to get out of its own way. I’m very interested in where this goes.

Thank you! I’ve done all the editing I can at the moment; it’s just these last few things that exceed my ability to do alone.

I tried Spleeter for this, but unfortunately it couldn’t tell the music from the dialogue. I suspect the issue is that the music is almost exclusively violin at that moment, and in the same sort of audio range as speech. My current solution is to integrate the music into the scene, but the result is a bit obvious.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars

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Time

sonofabinadi said:

All of the changes and trims you’re making make perfect sense to me; I’m excited to see how it turns out! I can see how the proposed edits will help to assist the movie in conveying the themes effectively, without having to spell it out for the viewer.

In terms of the things you need help with, I’m not super skilled with editing, but I’ll be happy to help where I can!

Thank you, I appreciate it! The big non-technical frustration is getting a copy of the audiobook; I haven’t been able to source it through any of my normal avenues.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars

Author
Time
 (Edited)

I’ve always enjoyed how much more talky TLJ is than the other two so I’m not sure the dialogue trimming is for me, but some of your more structural and visual changes seem very neat - the movie’s tendency to do a Marvel and put unnecessary humour in otherwise sincere moments is somewhat irritating - so I’d really appreciate a link when it’s done.

If Maz sent them to find DJ and then DJ betrays them, doesn’t that reflect somewhat poorly on Maz? Not that it matters in this film.

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This is really cool, Faraday! I’d like to check this out sometime.

I’m trying to think of how you could get the red plom bloom thing to work…

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TestingOutTheTest said:

The Last Jedi is a film with great ideas and themes that it doesn’t communicate clearly.

They don’t explicitly communicate them to avoid needless spoonfeeding. Imagine if J.J. explicitly had Kylo go up to the camera and spoonfeed us that he was injured and bleeding and that was why he lost to Rey.

Removed Tali and all introductions to the bombing fleet personnel - it’s more important to focus on Paige in this sequence.

It’s there to add weight to when Tallie and the others — some of Poe’s friends — are killed in the ambush.

Removed random insert shots of stuff in Luke’s hut; the scene cuts directly to his robes being folded.

It’s an establishing shot telling us that we’re inside “some kind of building”.

Reinstated the deleted scene where Finn gets his jacket from Poe, with scene transition by poppasketti and pleasehello (Hal).

It’s redundant. We don’t need to push it down our throats that Finn has to fight for the cause.

Removed Leia slapping Poe. That’s not how a good leader would act, not to mention it’s a double-standard; imagine if Han slapped Rey for something in TFA.

The difference is that Poe caused mass genocide.

Reinstated the “Luke Has A Moment” deleted scene (Hal).

I also think it’s redundant. It can be already be inferred he’s mourning Han in the Falcon scene.

Force Skype conversations: dialogue extensively trimmed. Only one line is spoken in the first one, which breaks the connection; in the second they manage to hold a short conversation; by the third, they can communicate freely; in the fourth, they touch hands.

Scene 1 re-establishes Rey saw Han as a father figure, foreshadows Luke’s death and (re-)establishes Kylo’s relationship with Luke. Don’t remember too much about Scene 2.

Cut the Robot Chicken style joke where Luke tickles Rey’s hand.

It’s to show that Rey is naive, especially when it comes to the Force.

Removed reference to Luke cutting himself off from the Force. This is such a massive idea that the KOTOR games were completely centred on exploring it, and here it’s tossed out as a throwaway explanation for something that doesn’t even need one. Having the Force was never like having a GPS tracker on you in the OT, so why would we suddenly need a reason that Leia and Snoke haven’t been able to find Luke with the Force?

Luke doesn’t want to use the Force anymore. He thinks he, himself, will make things worse. It also explains how he didn’t sense Han’s death and the NR’s destruction.

Luke’s first lesson has been pruned to focus on his opinion that the Jedi’s legacy is failure, and so is his own.

If you’re referring to the lesson about the light, that was to show that the light would still exist, even if the Jedi die off. Luke believes the galaxy doesn’t NEED the Jedi.

No shirtless Kylo japes. He just happens to not be wearing a shirt now.

It’s to show that Rey is actually seeing Kylo and not just sensing him.

Luke deactivates his lightsaber immediately in the third flashback; he doesn’t realise Kylo is awake and hears it, . VFX shot courtesy of SparkySywer.

He keeps it on because he was ashamed of what he was doing. It’s like in ROTJ when he sees his hand after catching himself harming Vader.

Removed iron/spaceship gag, using a deleted scene restored by poppasketti (Hal).

Then how are you going to explain how or where they got FO uniforms?

Used poppasketti’s editing of the buildup to Snoke’s death using musical score from The Force Awakens (Hal).

Snoke’s hubris blinds him from realizing Kylo was gonna kill him.

Removed the awkward kiss between Finn and Rose. There aren’t any romantic undertones in their story arc so it comes out of nowhere, and Finn doesn’t actually look particularly pleased about it.

That’s the point. Finn is so caught up in Rey he doesn’t realize Rose loves him, and even he rejects her because she sexually harassed him, which also reinforces that he’s still into Rey, even WITH caring for the cause.

Cut the Broom Boy scene from the ending, instead irising out on the small spark of the Resistance that the whole film has been about saving as they bond in the Falcon.

This removes the point of the movie - Luke’s sacrifice inspires hope in times of hopelessness. This also removes foreshadowing for the galaxy rallying on Exegol.

Man, I thought you’d gotten over needlessly arguing with people’s own creative projects. If you aren’t on board with someone’s ideas, move on.

This looks like a very promising fanedit, Faraday. I really like the direction you want to take the Last Jedi.

Reading R + L ≠ J theories

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Time
 (Edited)

sade1212 said:

I’ve always enjoyed how much more talky TLJ is than the other two so I’m not sure the dialogue trimming is for me, but some of your more structural and visual changes seem very neat - the movie’s tendency to do a Marvel and put unnecessary humour in otherwise sincere moments is somewhat irritating - so I’d really appreciate a link when it’s done.

If Maz sent them to find DJ and then DJ betrays them, doesn’t that reflect somewhat poorly on Maz? Not that it matters in this film.

I think some of the structural aspects would translate to other edits quite easily - things like DJ being the Master Codebreaker, for instance.

Maz’s Castle had a mixed and dubious clientèle; the fact that she was connected with somewhat shady people in TFA was what stopped her feeling like Yoda 2.0 to me. So the fact that she’s apologetically sending them to the only person she knows who could do it, and that person is an amoral criminal, makes a lot of sense to me.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars

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Time

RogueLeader said:

This is really cool, Faraday! I’d like to check this out sometime.

I’m trying to think of how you could get the red plom bloom thing to work…

I think it’s easier than it sounds - I’ll export an example when I can, but I’ve added the insert closeup shot of the plomme bloom when DJ is crossing the cell (mirrored to match the action). It reads like Rose and Finn look at it as he walks in front of them on his way to the door.

The trick is just to get it to look like it’s pinned to DJ’s filthy jacket in the semi-darkness, instead of the well-lit pristine coat of the Master Codebreaker. I wonder if EBSynth could do it.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars

Author
Time

SparkySywer said:

TestingOutTheTest said:

The Last Jedi is a film with great ideas and themes that it doesn’t communicate clearly.

They don’t explicitly communicate them to avoid needless spoonfeeding. Imagine if J.J. explicitly had Kylo go up to the camera and spoonfeed us that he was injured and bleeding and that was why he lost to Rey.

Removed Tali and all introductions to the bombing fleet personnel - it’s more important to focus on Paige in this sequence.

It’s there to add weight to when Tallie and the others — some of Poe’s friends — are killed in the ambush.

Removed random insert shots of stuff in Luke’s hut; the scene cuts directly to his robes being folded.

It’s an establishing shot telling us that we’re inside “some kind of building”.

Reinstated the deleted scene where Finn gets his jacket from Poe, with scene transition by poppasketti and pleasehello (Hal).

It’s redundant. We don’t need to push it down our throats that Finn has to fight for the cause.

Removed Leia slapping Poe. That’s not how a good leader would act, not to mention it’s a double-standard; imagine if Han slapped Rey for something in TFA.

The difference is that Poe caused mass genocide.

Reinstated the “Luke Has A Moment” deleted scene (Hal).

I also think it’s redundant. It can be already be inferred he’s mourning Han in the Falcon scene.

Force Skype conversations: dialogue extensively trimmed. Only one line is spoken in the first one, which breaks the connection; in the second they manage to hold a short conversation; by the third, they can communicate freely; in the fourth, they touch hands.

Scene 1 re-establishes Rey saw Han as a father figure, foreshadows Luke’s death and (re-)establishes Kylo’s relationship with Luke. Don’t remember too much about Scene 2.

Cut the Robot Chicken style joke where Luke tickles Rey’s hand.

It’s to show that Rey is naive, especially when it comes to the Force.

Removed reference to Luke cutting himself off from the Force. This is such a massive idea that the KOTOR games were completely centred on exploring it, and here it’s tossed out as a throwaway explanation for something that doesn’t even need one. Having the Force was never like having a GPS tracker on you in the OT, so why would we suddenly need a reason that Leia and Snoke haven’t been able to find Luke with the Force?

Luke doesn’t want to use the Force anymore. He thinks he, himself, will make things worse. It also explains how he didn’t sense Han’s death and the NR’s destruction.

Luke’s first lesson has been pruned to focus on his opinion that the Jedi’s legacy is failure, and so is his own.

If you’re referring to the lesson about the light, that was to show that the light would still exist, even if the Jedi die off. Luke believes the galaxy doesn’t NEED the Jedi.

No shirtless Kylo japes. He just happens to not be wearing a shirt now.

It’s to show that Rey is actually seeing Kylo and not just sensing him.

Luke deactivates his lightsaber immediately in the third flashback; he doesn’t realise Kylo is awake and hears it, . VFX shot courtesy of SparkySywer.

He keeps it on because he was ashamed of what he was doing. It’s like in ROTJ when he sees his hand after catching himself harming Vader.

Removed iron/spaceship gag, using a deleted scene restored by poppasketti (Hal).

Then how are you going to explain how or where they got FO uniforms?

Used poppasketti’s editing of the buildup to Snoke’s death using musical score from The Force Awakens (Hal).

Snoke’s hubris blinds him from realizing Kylo was gonna kill him.

Removed the awkward kiss between Finn and Rose. There aren’t any romantic undertones in their story arc so it comes out of nowhere, and Finn doesn’t actually look particularly pleased about it.

That’s the point. Finn is so caught up in Rey he doesn’t realize Rose loves him, and even he rejects her because she sexually harassed him, which also reinforces that he’s still into Rey, even WITH caring for the cause.

Cut the Broom Boy scene from the ending, instead irising out on the small spark of the Resistance that the whole film has been about saving as they bond in the Falcon.

This removes the point of the movie - Luke’s sacrifice inspires hope in times of hopelessness. This also removes foreshadowing for the galaxy rallying on Exegol.

Man, I thought you’d gotten over needlessly arguing with people’s own creative projects. If you aren’t on board with someone’s ideas, move on.

This looks like a very promising fanedit, Faraday. I really like the direction you want to take the Last Jedi.

Thank you!

Testing, there’s a TLJ edit by Bob Ducsay that I think you might like.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars

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@Cap Where can I find that?

@Sparky Ah, yes, suggestions for helping achieve OP’s intention while also making sure he knows what he’s already changing is inherently wrong.

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TestingOutTheTest said:

@Sparky Ah, yes, suggestions for helping achieve OP’s intention while also making sure he knows what he’s already changing is inherently wrong.

You’re arguing against the fundamental ideas of OP’s fanedit. 9 times out of 10, or probably more, you just disagree with the fanedit on a conceptual level. That’s fine. The fanedit is just not for you. OP understands what he’s changing fine. You often act like you have the supreme understanding of the ST, but you’re just one person with one particular subjective interpretation of these movies.

The best thing that could possibly happen (from your perspective) is you end up hijacking their creative project. In all likelihood, you’re just gonna end up arguing for the sake of arguing.

If you truly want to give suggestions for helping OP achieve their intention, give constructive criticism on the execution of their ideas. You often give destructive criticism of their creative purpose.

I’m probably contributing to the problem by feeding it and adding more off-topic comments to this post, though.

CaptainFaraday said:

HELP NEEDED:
Here’s where I need some help - mostly technical, but a few issues with finding access to source material I need.

  • Rendering new opening crawl.
  • Getting access to “Cobalt Squadron” audiobook narrated by KMT, to create new Rose Tico line of dialogue (“The shuttle’s being towed!”).
  • Removing music from dialogue. (“Red plomme bloom!” “The Master Codebreaker!”)
  • Colour correct shot of red plomme bloom so that it’s on DJ’s jacket.
  • Remove lightsaber audio from dialogue in third flashback.
  • Add 4K source shot to punch in for Snoke closeup.
  • Extend final group shot on the Falcon by a few seconds.

I can definitely help with the opening crawl. What were you thinking of for the text? Unless I’m dead blind and can’t find it.

I can also probably help with the plomme bloom but I’m not sure specifically what you were thinking that would entail. Speaking of which, not really sure what you mean by removing lightsaber audio from dialogue in the third flashback.

Reading R + L ≠ J theories

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SparkySywer said:

TestingOutTheTest said:

@Sparky Ah, yes, suggestions for helping achieve OP’s intention while also making sure he knows what he’s already changing is inherently wrong.

You’re arguing against the fundamental ideas of OP’s fanedit. 9 times out of 10, or probably more, you just disagree with the fanedit on a conceptual level. That’s fine. The fanedit is just not for you. OP understands what he’s changing fine. You often act like you have the supreme understanding of the ST, but you’re just one person with one particular subjective interpretation of these movies.

The best thing that could possibly happen (from your perspective) is you end up hijacking their creative project. In all likelihood, you’re just gonna end up arguing for the sake of arguing.

If you truly want to give suggestions for helping OP achieve their intention, give constructive criticism on the execution of their ideas. You often give destructive criticism of their creative purpose.

I’m probably contributing to the problem by feeding it and adding more off-topic comments to this post, though.

  1. That’s the point! You guys defend the ST all the time. Why can’t I?

  2. The edits I addressed remove some of the best things about TLJ, make them less meaningful, take away oomph and pointlessly add stuff that was cut out for a reason.

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SparkySywer said:

CaptainFaraday said:

HELP NEEDED:
Here’s where I need some help - mostly technical, but a few issues with finding access to source material I need.

  • Rendering new opening crawl.
  • Getting access to “Cobalt Squadron” audiobook narrated by KMT, to create new Rose Tico line of dialogue (“The shuttle’s being towed!”).
  • Removing music from dialogue. (“Red plomme bloom!” “The Master Codebreaker!”)
  • Colour correct shot of red plomme bloom so that it’s on DJ’s jacket.
  • Remove lightsaber audio from dialogue in third flashback.
  • Add 4K source shot to punch in for Snoke closeup.
  • Extend final group shot on the Falcon by a few seconds.

I can definitely help with the opening crawl. What were you thinking of for the text? Unless I’m dead blind and can’t find it.

I put it in the screenplay on Drive but nowhere else, so it is a bit buried. I’ve only changed the first paragraph; I originally planned to add something in the third paragraph to indicate it’s been a few months since the events of TFA, but it felt clunky and ultimately not worth the effort of changing the whole thing around it.

And thanks! I know there’s the fantastic Blender plugin for opening crawls, but my laptop won’t run Blender properly.

I can also probably help with the plomme bloom but I’m not sure specifically what you were thinking that would entail. Speaking of which, not really sure what you mean by removing lightsaber audio from dialogue in the third flashback.

I’ll export the current workprint of the plomme bloom bit and it’ll become clearer what I’m angling at. With the third flashback, I realised when I was listening with headphones that you can still hear the lightsaber humming while Luke narrates - except in this version, he’s just turned the lightsaber off.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars

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I looked up “Bob Ducsay tlj edit” and realized Cap was talking about the theatrical version of TLJ. No, I don’t think TLJ is super-duper universal god-tier. Do you notice how I didn’t point out the flaws of the edits I didn’t address (aside from that, I disagree with trimming the Fathier chase)? Even then, I do have change ideas for TLJ (and TROS), but those can only be accomplished by rewrites.

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TestingOutTheTest said:

SparkySywer said:

TestingOutTheTest said:

@Sparky Ah, yes, suggestions for helping achieve OP’s intention while also making sure he knows what he’s already changing is inherently wrong.

You’re arguing against the fundamental ideas of OP’s fanedit. 9 times out of 10, or probably more, you just disagree with the fanedit on a conceptual level. That’s fine. The fanedit is just not for you. OP understands what he’s changing fine. You often act like you have the supreme understanding of the ST, but you’re just one person with one particular subjective interpretation of these movies.

The best thing that could possibly happen (from your perspective) is you end up hijacking their creative project. In all likelihood, you’re just gonna end up arguing for the sake of arguing.

If you truly want to give suggestions for helping OP achieve their intention, give constructive criticism on the execution of their ideas. You often give destructive criticism of their creative purpose.

I’m probably contributing to the problem by feeding it and adding more off-topic comments to this post, though.

  1. That’s the point! You guys defend the ST all the time. Why can’t I?

  2. The edits I addressed remove some of the best things about TLJ, make them less meaningful, take away oomph and pointlessly add stuff that was cut out for a reason.

About half the time I see a new fanedit pop up on the forum, I read the changelog and think “What? That’s stupid. They’ve completely missed the point of the film.” - the trick is to then resist the urge to tell them that and set the world to rights. I admit occasionally I’ll write a paragraph on reddit or whatever to convey my ideas about something, but it doesn’t really matter; no one is going to massively change their opinions on a movie because someone on the internet told them their interpretation was wrong. I’ve long accepted that I’m more sympathetic to the sequels than 75% of the internet, and it seems to me like you’re probably more sympathetic to them than 99% of the internet. I imagine opinions will shift more positive in the next two decades, like they did with the prequels.

I suppose it’s possibly easier for me to say this because I don’t rely entirely on others to produce fanedits for me, so I know I can just crib ideas I like from other people for my own versions while not using those which don’t appeal to me, but I think it’s still probably best to just shake your head and move on when you see someone suggest something you think is daft. Most faneditors are looking primarily for feedback/advice/help with executing their ideas, and not so much to just be told that all the changes they want to make are invalid.

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Cool project Faraday! Funnily enough, I actually went away from the film with the exact opposite impression: it didn’t explain enough. Luke has a good point that the Jedi are pretty bad (as demonstrated by the prequels) but doesn’t delve into that enough.

But at the same time, you’re right that doing a more detailed approach might make people think the film is actually advocating those ideas instead of the badass Jedi Luke at the end. As such, this project certainly has its place. Not sure what Testing is on about.

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Jar Jar Bricks said:

Cool project Faraday! Funnily enough, I actually went away from the film with the exact opposite impression: it didn’t explain enough. Luke has a good point that the Jedi are pretty bad (as demonstrated by the prequels) but doesn’t delve into that enough.

But at the same time, you’re right that doing a more detailed approach might make people think the film is actually advocating those ideas instead of the badass Jedi Luke at the end. As such, this project certainly has its place. Not sure what Testing is on about.

I actually agree with you - one of its pitfalls is that it goes into great depth on Grumpy Luke’s opinions, then doesn’t spend nearly as much time and detail rebutting them when it rejects them at the end. Cutting down the amount of the former hopefully helps to alleviate that disparity.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars

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one of its pitfalls is that it goes into great depth on Grumpy Luke’s opinions, then doesn’t spend nearly as much time and detail rebutting them when it rejects them at the end.

That’s the point. Despite the flaws of the Jedi, Luke now believes they’re something worth fighting for.

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Any reason why you’re keeping Finn’s botched Kamikaze run?

“The Dark Side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural.”
-Sheev Palpatine, Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith (2005)

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Finn would’ve died for nothing. He wouldn’t have destroyed the cannon. Rose kept him alive and reminded him that there’s something else worth fighting for.

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This is a very interesting idea for an edit and am curious how it’ll turn out!

“Because you are a PalpaWalker?”

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CamSMurph said:

Any reason why you’re keeping Finn’s botched Kamikaze run?

I don’t see any real issue with it. Finn’s arc is about learning to care about the Resistance, it’s just a practical way to demonstrate that.

I think it’s ways going to feel a bit weird because Finn’s arc is already functionally complete before then - when he leaves for “home” with Rose in the shuttle. The entirety of Crait is structurally in the denouement of the story, and ends up functioning like a second third act, which isn’t ideal, but there’s nothing to do about it.

“It’s like rhymetry. They poem.” - Leorge Gucas

TROS Novelisation: The Faraday Edit, TLJ: Stoic Edition, ROTS: The Faraday Nudge, ROTS Ultracut: Order 66, Kenobi: Faraday Cut, Godzilla Vs Megalon, Godzilla Vs Gigan, Godzilla: Final Wars, The Light Rises, Faraday Jr.'s Star Wars