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The Last Jedi: A ST One-Film Edit — Page 3

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idir_hh said:

If you’re to use visions during the helmet scene, I would go for visions of Luke, Ben, Leia and Rey showing Ben compassion, it demonstrates that deep down all he wants is to be loved, setting up his convo with Han.
As for the Deathstar scene I think the establishing shots are fine, the shots are a little stuttery though but as you said it’s a rough mockup. I would however shy away from using anything from the Vader Fan-film as it brakes the flow and tone of the scene, I’d cut from the inner establishing shots to Ben standing on the edge right before the Han convo.

I really love those ideas for the vision. I think the tough part is that it’s set up just a few minutes before this (at Crait) that Luke would haunt him. So I do feel like there needs to be some of that in there. That being said, though, I do like the idea of adding those moments of kindness. I’ll see what I can muster up.

I hear you on FOD. If it’s not working, then it’s the first thing to go. I have tried the transition from inner establishing shots to Ben on the edge, but it felt pretty abrupt. I’ll give it another look though.

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Lifeincontext said:

Ending V2

https://vimeo.com/419869547
PW: fanedit

See above post for a play-by-play.

Also, parts of it are still very rough. Apologies.

I’m watching this as someone who knows nothing about editing, but it feels a bit odd, right the end, for the Falcon to appear to go into hyperspace in the Tatooine shot with the twin suns, and then appear to do so again when broom boy is looking up. Have we jumped slightly back in time at the beginning of broom boy’s last scene? Or is the Falcon jumping twice for some reason? Like I say, I’m just a viewer not a creator, but it feels a little odd for me.

I really appreciate you doing this though! It’s a fantastic idea!

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 (Edited)

Spottyfriend said:

Lifeincontext said:

Ending V2

https://vimeo.com/419869547
PW: fanedit

See above post for a play-by-play.

Also, parts of it are still very rough. Apologies.

I’m watching this as someone who knows nothing about editing, but it feels a bit odd, right the end, for the Falcon to appear to go into hyperspace in the Tatooine shot with the twin suns, and then appear to do so again when broom boy is looking up. Have we jumped slightly back in time at the beginning of broom boy’s last scene? Or is the Falcon jumping twice for some reason? Like I say, I’m just a viewer not a creator, but it feels a little odd for me.

I really appreciate you doing this though! It’s a fantastic idea!

That’s definitely something I realized too lol. The end uses the great work of popasketti and snooker for the Falcon stuff, so I just used the shot as is. However… if anyone wants to try a normal Falcon shot with no hyperspace at the end, I’d love to see it.

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Watching the latest version of the end again, I really think it’s an excellent way to end the sequel(s) (and I feel myself tearing up a little with the Rey Skywalker/Broom Boy sequence, which is great because I felt nothing watching the former as part of tRoS). Another bit of feedback, which again apologies for not suggesting an actual solution to this, is that it feels a bit jarring leaving Broom Boy at 5:26 and having a full two minutes (and within that a short flashback) to spend with Rey, only returning to him at 7:30. It feels a little too long to be able to come back and simply continue on with the Broom Boy scene as smoothly as a viewer might like.

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 (Edited)

Here’s a new version of the ending. Based on some feedback, I tried to find an effective new arrangement of the Tatooine/Broom Boy clips. I found a moment I thought was interesting. Let me know what you guys think!

https://vimeo.com/418754884
PW: fanedit

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 (Edited)

That was surprisingly moving! Even though the Falcon liftoff to hyperspace over Canto Bight doesn’t make too much logical sense, it definitely feels compelling and might not even need to make sense.

In this version, is Canto Bight on Tatooine? Because if that were set up earlier, it would potentially be really cool. Of course, it would require changing the time of day in the Broom Boy scene.

What a grand and intoxicating innocence. How could you be so naive? There is no escape. Come, lay down your weapons. It is not too late for my mercy.
Episode 9 Rewrite THE SHATTERED SWORD (Complete!)
The Force Awakens Restructured (V3 Released!) and The Starlight Project (WORKPRINT RELEASED!)

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 (Edited)

NeverarGreat said:

That was surprisingly moving! Even though the Falcon liftoff to hyperspace over Canto Bight doesn’t make too much logical sense, it definitely feels compelling. In this version, is Canto Bight on Tatooine? Because if that were set up earlier, it would potentially be really cool. Of course, it would require changing the time of day in the Broom Boy scene.

Haha well we don’t see Canto Bight earlier. In my mind, this happens on the dark side of Tatooine lol.

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Lifeincontext said:

Here’s a new version of the ending. Based on some feedback, I tried to find an effective new arrangement of the Tatooine/Broom Boy clips. I found a moment I thought was interesting. Let me know what you guys think!

https://vimeo.com/418754884
PW: fanedit

👏

Peace is a lie
There is only passion…

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Lifeincontext said:

Here’s a new version of the ending. Based on some feedback, I tried to find an effective new arrangement of the Tatooine/Broom Boy clips. I found a moment I thought was interesting. Let me know what you guys think!

https://vimeo.com/418754884
PW: fanedit

Holy shit that made me actually feel things

reylo?

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idir_hh said:

I really like the Falcon/Broom boy combo at the end. Could it be implied that Kylo has taken a kind of pilgrimage to the ruins of the Deathstar, where his grandfather was redeemed? I think some slow wide shots of the ruins (could use some wide shots from the Rey climbing sequence) would help fix the abruptness and better establish the setting.

So I decided to redo this sequence a bit and go the other direction, like you’re pointing to. When all else fails, simple is usually better lol. So I’ve basically eliminated all visions, including Leia calling to him.

It now cuts directly from Rey cutting Kylo off to the Death Star. After the establishing shots, we get one vision of Han falling, and then he says, “Hey, kid.”

I really tried to add the compassion moments, but there really isn’t enough to make it convincing without looking choppy, in my opinion.

Is this transition too abrupt? Do we need to see the reason Kylo decides to go to the Death Star?

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 (Edited)

For the compassion thing, maybe he hears voices like these, “There’s still light in him I know it” “come home, we miss you” “Ben, my nephew, no one’s ever really gone”…

Pacing wise it might be better to have the death star scene after Luke’s death.

Peace is a lie
There is only passion…

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Lifeincontext said:

Here’s a new version of the ending. Based on some feedback, I tried to find an effective new arrangement of the Tatooine/Broom Boy clips. I found a moment I thought was interesting. Let me know what you guys think!

https://vimeo.com/418754884
PW: fanedit

This is great!

Really sorry to be THAT guy (!), but I’m still not entirely sure the initial Broom Boy scene placement fully works pacing-wise. It’s definitely a very cool idea: while Rey pauses, considering her place in the galaxy and Luke’s legacy, this is then mirrored by seeing Luke’s legacy in action, inspiring hope; we cut back to Rey taking the Skywalker name and effectively concluding her and Luke’s arc - great stuff! However, I feel like cutting away to Broom Boy stuff for 30 seconds effectively in the middle of a conversation (“who are you?” / “Rey Skywalker”), doesn’t quite work and feels a bit choppy. We’re expecting an answer from Rey, and instead we cut away to a totally different scene which we’ve never seen before (unlike in your previous version, where we are introduced to the Broom Boy scene in much more of a natural break).

Again, sorry for the lack of solutions!

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Spottyfriend said:

Lifeincontext said:

Here’s a new version of the ending. Based on some feedback, I tried to find an effective new arrangement of the Tatooine/Broom Boy clips. I found a moment I thought was interesting. Let me know what you guys think!

https://vimeo.com/418754884
PW: fanedit

This is great!

Really sorry to be THAT guy (!), but I’m still not entirely sure the initial Broom Boy scene placement fully works pacing-wise. It’s definitely a very cool idea: while Rey pauses, considering her place in the galaxy and Luke’s legacy, this is then mirrored by seeing Luke’s legacy in action, inspiring hope; we cut back to Rey taking the Skywalker name and effectively concluding her and Luke’s arc - great stuff! However, I feel like cutting away to Broom Boy stuff for 30 seconds effectively in the middle of a conversation (“who are you?” / “Rey Skywalker”), doesn’t quite work and feels a bit choppy. We’re expecting an answer from Rey, and instead we cut away to a totally different scene which we’ve never seen before (unlike in your previous version, where we are introduced to the Broom Boy scene in much more of a natural break).

Again, sorry for the lack of solutions!

Haha! Well I will say that I tried several other places For the broom boy stuff to go, but there really wasn’t a more natural fit that met both of your criteria lol. But I’ll take another look. 😃

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Lifeincontext said:

Spottyfriend said:

Lifeincontext said:

Here’s a new version of the ending. Based on some feedback, I tried to find an effective new arrangement of the Tatooine/Broom Boy clips. I found a moment I thought was interesting. Let me know what you guys think!

https://vimeo.com/418754884
PW: fanedit

This is great!

Really sorry to be THAT guy (!), but I’m still not entirely sure the initial Broom Boy scene placement fully works pacing-wise. It’s definitely a very cool idea: while Rey pauses, considering her place in the galaxy and Luke’s legacy, this is then mirrored by seeing Luke’s legacy in action, inspiring hope; we cut back to Rey taking the Skywalker name and effectively concluding her and Luke’s arc - great stuff! However, I feel like cutting away to Broom Boy stuff for 30 seconds effectively in the middle of a conversation (“who are you?” / “Rey Skywalker”), doesn’t quite work and feels a bit choppy. We’re expecting an answer from Rey, and instead we cut away to a totally different scene which we’ve never seen before (unlike in your previous version, where we are introduced to the Broom Boy scene in much more of a natural break).

Again, sorry for the lack of solutions!

Haha! Well I will say that I tried several other places For the broom boy stuff to go, but there really wasn’t a more natural fit that met both of your criteria lol. But I’ll take another look. 😃

Between the two options already presented, which feels better as a viewer?

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Lifeincontext said:

Lifeincontext said:

Spottyfriend said:

Lifeincontext said:

Here’s a new version of the ending. Based on some feedback, I tried to find an effective new arrangement of the Tatooine/Broom Boy clips. I found a moment I thought was interesting. Let me know what you guys think!

https://vimeo.com/418754884
PW: fanedit

This is great!

Really sorry to be THAT guy (!), but I’m still not entirely sure the initial Broom Boy scene placement fully works pacing-wise. It’s definitely a very cool idea: while Rey pauses, considering her place in the galaxy and Luke’s legacy, this is then mirrored by seeing Luke’s legacy in action, inspiring hope; we cut back to Rey taking the Skywalker name and effectively concluding her and Luke’s arc - great stuff! However, I feel like cutting away to Broom Boy stuff for 30 seconds effectively in the middle of a conversation (“who are you?” / “Rey Skywalker”), doesn’t quite work and feels a bit choppy. We’re expecting an answer from Rey, and instead we cut away to a totally different scene which we’ve never seen before (unlike in your previous version, where we are introduced to the Broom Boy scene in much more of a natural break).

Again, sorry for the lack of solutions!

Haha! Well I will say that I tried several other places For the broom boy stuff to go, but there really wasn’t a more natural fit that met both of your criteria lol. But I’ll take another look. 😃

Between the two options already presented, which feels better as a viewer?

Perhaps I’m in the minority? But I actually prefer the first version in terms of Broom Boy/Rey scene placement. I think it succeeds in telling the viewer at near the beginning - ‘we’re gonna be cutting between two scenes in this sequence’ - by showing both relatively early. It’s more natural than the second version, although there’s still the problem of the length of time between the introduction and conclusion of the Broom Boy section.

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Any updates? I’d love to see the latest version