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The Force Awakens: The Starlight Project - WORKPRINT RELEASED — Page 8

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I do use that keyframing method as a rule, but I often find that even 4 frames without a keyframe is enough to break the tracking. Also, this shot had a bit of camera bounce at times, which required such attention.

I was having a lot of jittery tracking on the X-wing approach to the Starkiller, and after investigation I realized that it was due to not knowing exactly where the replacement matte should be. This can be mitigated by tracking using an unaltered still (the piece that you want to replace) allowing for precise matching of its location through the shot. After getting an exact lock you can alter the still and it will retain the movement.

What a grand and intoxicating innocence. How could you be so naive? There is no escape. Come, lay down your weapons. It is not too late for my mercy.
Episode 9 Rewrite THE SHATTERED SWORD (Complete!)
The Force Awakens Restructured (V3 Released!) and The Starlight Project (WORKPRINT RELEASED!)

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 (Edited)

I’ve long had some larger plans for the Starlight Project, but I’ve kept them close to the vest for a while as I’ve debated about how I want it to play out. However, since The Last Jedi leans heavily into the mental connection between Kylo and Rey, I’m much more confident that these ideas will work in the broader context of this trilogy.

These biggest change is a greatly restructured Starkiller section with an expanded Interrogation scene, where the viewer is taken into the minds of Rey and Kylo. Here’s how I imagine the sequence of events:

  • Scenes at the Resistance Base (including Leia’s deleted scene).
  • Weapon Charging.
  • Resistance Battle Plans.
  • Han and Leia’s Farewell.
  • Rey’s Nightmare (Use cut section where Finn is almost eaten by a Rathtar, flashes of Han and the map, visions of the Falcon crashing on Starkiller Base, perhaps being destroyed in the process).
  • The Interrogation (Kylo sees Rey’s thoughts and investigates the crashed Falcon while discussing Han, then Rey invades Kylo’s mind. Ren’s prayer to Vader is revealed here in summary form, including unused shots of Kylo watching the Starkiller laser and ending with Vader’s helmet).
  • Snoke (include Hux and the location of the Resistance Base. The Starkiller has two targets in the final act).
  • Rey’s first escape attempt (ends with the trooper, unmoving, saying that he’ll tighten the restraints).
  • Han and company trek to the base (Rey’s distorted vision is all we see of their landing).
  • Hux is updated on the Starkiller charging.
  • Rey’s escape, and Kylo’s tantrum.
  • Han and company lower the shields.
  • Kylo senses Han.
  • Finn and Han discuss how to free Rey.
  • Rey quickly runs into Han and company.

What a grand and intoxicating innocence. How could you be so naive? There is no escape. Come, lay down your weapons. It is not too late for my mercy.
Episode 9 Rewrite THE SHATTERED SWORD (Complete!)
The Force Awakens Restructured (V3 Released!) and The Starlight Project (WORKPRINT RELEASED!)

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Wow, I really like that. Looking forward to see it.

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Seems like it would remove the “we’re making our landing approach at lightspeed?!” thing.
Would you remove Leia’s line, “Han, how?” and “If I told you you wouldn’t like it”?

Initiating self-destruct countdown…

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Hal 9000 said:

Seems like it would remove the “we’re making our landing approach at lightspeed?!” thing.
Would you remove Leia’s line, “Han, how?” and “If I told you you wouldn’t like it”?

Why?

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Hal 9000 said:

Seems like it would remove the “we’re making our landing approach at lightspeed?!” thing.
Would you remove Leia’s line, “Han, how?” and “If I told you you wouldn’t like it”?

Well they still get onto the planet the same way, it’s just that it would be filtered through Rey’s vision. I’m imagining something like Spock’s Mind Meld from Star Trek 2009, where the information is still communicated but in an altered way. So Leia’s line would stay.

What a grand and intoxicating innocence. How could you be so naive? There is no escape. Come, lay down your weapons. It is not too late for my mercy.
Episode 9 Rewrite THE SHATTERED SWORD (Complete!)
The Force Awakens Restructured (V3 Released!) and The Starlight Project (WORKPRINT RELEASED!)

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Ah, gotcha.

Initiating self-destruct countdown…

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Not really a serious idea (Yet!), I was kicking around the concept that the First Order is actually as old as the Empire itself:

Episode VII
The First Order

The Galactic Empire lives.
Formed in secret as the first
act of Emperor Palpatine,
Generations of his loyal
servants have been building
a weapon that can destroy
entire stars.

Believing this First Order
is merely a weak imitator,
the New Republic is blind
to this deadly threat. Only
General Leia Organa mobilizes
a covert Resistance in response.

Desperate for allies, Leia
has sent her most trusted pilot
on a mission to discover the
whereabouts of her brother,
the last of the Jedi Knights,
and who has mysteriously
vanished without a trace…

What a grand and intoxicating innocence. How could you be so naive? There is no escape. Come, lay down your weapons. It is not too late for my mercy.
Episode 9 Rewrite THE SHATTERED SWORD (Complete!)
The Force Awakens Restructured (V3 Released!) and The Starlight Project (WORKPRINT RELEASED!)

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 (Edited)

NeverarGreat said:

Not really a serious idea (Yet!), I was kicking around the concept that the First Order is actually as old as the Empire itself.

I really really love the idea. The crawl just needs some polishing haha 😄

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 (Edited)

Maybe something more like this:

Episode VII
The First Order

The Empire has survived.
Founded in secret by the
Emperor himself, a loyal
FIRST ORDER has been
working for generations
to build a weapon that can
destroy entire stars.

Meanwhile, the last of the
Jedi Knights has vanished,
leaving the New Republic
blind to this deadly threat.
Only General Leia Organa,
sister of the Jedi, has the
foresight to mobilize
a covert resistance.

Desperate for allies,
Leia has sent her most
trusted pilot on a mission
to find her long-lost brother,
now her only hope for
a galaxy in peril…

What a grand and intoxicating innocence. How could you be so naive? There is no escape. Come, lay down your weapons. It is not too late for my mercy.
Episode 9 Rewrite THE SHATTERED SWORD (Complete!)
The Force Awakens Restructured (V3 Released!) and The Starlight Project (WORKPRINT RELEASED!)

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 (Edited)

Love it, brilliant idea! Is there anyway to implement some mention of the first order under the control of a dark side force user, or that the first order is a product of the dark side? If that makes sense.

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This is very intriguing, I can’t wait to see how this plays out.

“After a time, you may find that having, is not so pleasing a thing after all, as wanting. It is not logical, but it is often true.” - Spock

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 (Edited)

I’m pretty happy with the crawl I posted above. However, I’ve been thinking about the specifics of the crawls and realized that all of them are out of sync with the music except for the 1977 version of Star Wars.

The addition of an episode number and title mean that there’s now essentially three more lines of text in the first paragraph, throwing off the music. In the original, the second paragraph is accompanied by the middle section of the main theme, but it now starts during the first paragraph. For the Force Awakens, the final paragraph is in the right place to sync with the music, but its five lines are too short.

With this in mind, I believe I’ve figured out the proper number of lines in each paragraph for musical sync:

TFA Original Crawl -
First Paragraph: 7 lines (10 with number and title)
Second Paragraph: 7 lines
Third Paragraph: 5 lines
Total: 19

Proper TFA Crawl -
First Paragraph: 4 lines (7 with number and title)
Second Paragraph: 9 lines
Third Paragraph: 8 lines
Total: 21

Original Crawl (1977) -
First Paragraph: 6 lines
Second Paragraph: 8 lines
Third Paragraph: 7 lines
Total: 21

Note that each paragraph in the proper TFA crawl is one line longer than in the 1977 crawl, due to the entire sequence being sped up for all subsequent movies.

Here’s a crawl that makes use of that format, even if it’s a bit verbose:

Episode VII
The First Order

The Empire has survived.
Founded on his secret first order,
the Emperor’s legions have built
a weapon that devours the stars.

Twisted by vengeance against
its ancient foe, the First Order
and its evil knights have driven
the last of the Jedi into hiding.
Without the Jedi to protect the
New Republic, Only General
Leia Organa, sister of the exiled
Jedi, recognizes their deadly
peril.

Mobilizing a brave Resistance
with the reluctant support of
the Republic, Leia sends her
most trusted pilot on a mission
to find her long-lost brother,
now her only hope in
restoring peace and justice
to the galaxy…

Although I like my previous crawl better, it would be nice to get it into this format.

What a grand and intoxicating innocence. How could you be so naive? There is no escape. Come, lay down your weapons. It is not too late for my mercy.
Episode 9 Rewrite THE SHATTERED SWORD (Complete!)
The Force Awakens Restructured (V3 Released!) and The Starlight Project (WORKPRINT RELEASED!)

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 (Edited)

Go with the crawl you like best and use keyframes for the music sync. I’m doing crawls for Hal’s prequels and he pointed out the way he wanted the end of the crawl to sync with the music so I inserted an extra key frame for the end of the last paragraph. You want sync for each paragraph though, so maybe it’s harder to cheat in that case.

You can also make a difference with the way you format the text. You can reduce or increase the number of lines in a paragraph by changing the letter and word spacing and even the letter width to fit more or fewer words on a line.

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NeverarGreat said:

I tried to work the supreme leader, or evil overlord, or Snoke in there somewhere but it felt like too much information.

Are you still going to remove Snoke’s name in a few scenes ? It’s a change of your list that I don’t quite understand while everything else seems very solid.

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I think making the film’s title simply the name of the villains (and ones who will show up in the films that follow) is dumb, not to mention out of place in SW titles. But hey, that’s just my opinion.

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 (Edited)

Just joining in on the fun.

Episode VII
THE FORCE AWAKENS

Luke Skywalker has vanished.
Without the last Jedi, the NEW
REPUBLIC is unaware that the
evil legacy of the long dead
Emperor is emerging from the
remote fringes of the galaxy.

Founded on his FIRST ORDER
long before his fall, a loyal
legion has been working on a
hidden weapon that can devour
entire stars. The sinister army
escaped the fall of the Empire
and plots its return to power.

Only Luke’s sister, Leia Organa
has the foresight to mobilize a
covert RESISTANCE. She has
sent her best pilot to find traces
of her lost brother, now her only
hope for a galaxy in peril…

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 (Edited)

Dr. Krogshöj said:

Only Luke’s sister, Leia Organa
has the foresight to mobilize a
covert RESISTANCE. She has
sent her best pilot to find traces
of her lost brother, now her only
hope for a galaxy in peril…

I’m not a fan of saying “Luke’s sister” or “her brother” but oh well what do I know. I really like your crawl except for the final paragraph. I’d switch “a galaxy in peril” to “the galaxy” too, but that’s just me.

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In terms of setting the mood for a space fantasy, a name like ‘Leia Organa’ is very Space Princess. Luke Skywalker, on the other hand, is quite down to earth while still being a little space-ish. This makes sense when he’s the audience avatar in ANH. When he’s some super magical unicorn space wizard in TFA, putting ‘Luke’ in the crawl still feels to me like he’s a farmboy who hasn’t gotten his Jedi name yet, hence the brother and sister speak.

It also cuts down on the number of terms being name-dropped in the crawl and the potential confusion for first-time viewers of Leia Organa also being a Skywalker also being a Solo.

What a grand and intoxicating innocence. How could you be so naive? There is no escape. Come, lay down your weapons. It is not too late for my mercy.
Episode 9 Rewrite THE SHATTERED SWORD (Complete!)
The Force Awakens Restructured (V3 Released!) and The Starlight Project (WORKPRINT RELEASED!)

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Collipso said:

Dr. Krogshöj said:

Only Luke’s sister, Leia Organa
has the foresight to mobilize a
covert RESISTANCE. She has
sent her best pilot to find traces
of her lost brother, now her only
hope for a galaxy in peril…

I’m not a fan of saying “Luke’s sister” or “her brother” but oh well what do I know. I really like your crawl except for the final paragraph. I’d switch “a galaxy in peril” to “the galaxy” too, but that’s just me.

Personally I don’t like it because I wish they weren’t related in the first place. But hey, this isn’t a RotJ edit.