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The Fallen Temple

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 (Edited)

DISCLAIMER:

This edit is made using the Italian dub and is subtitled so as to - assuming you don’t understand the vocals - say another thing, hopefully changing the story significantly.

Apologies to those who can understand Italian and similar language, I made the faux pas of choosing a language that can be understood by people who don’t even speak it.

Anyway, I hope you take no offence to my butchering of the language 😅

AIM:

Inspired by David Houghton’s article; “George Lucas nearly wrote a perfect prequel trilogy. He just didn’t notice” and my own philosophical and political opinions - as well as my understanding and interest in historical eras - this edit is an attempt to change the meaning and themes of the prequel’s story, whilst keeping most beats intact.

This is a foreign language edit, akin to The Blackened Mantle, using the Italiano dub.

SYNOPSIS:

In the final days of the second Clone War, the Galactic Republic is crumbling from the inside and out.
Jedi Knight Anakin Vallorum’s world is imploding.
His friendship with the most powerful man in the Galaxy makes him a target.
His oath to the Jedi makes him a slave.
His love for his wife makes him a criminal.
His pain will make him a monster.

PLANNED CHANGES:

Depict the Jedi as not the good guys.
Depict the Sith as not the bad guys.
Depict Anakin as emotionally and psychologically troubled, dealing with guilt and nightmares from the war, and with the stress of his life in general.
Depict Obi-Wan and Anakin as genuine friends.
Depict Anakin and Padme as convincingly in love.
Improve the film overall.

FIRST 19 MINUTES
https://drive.google.com/open?id=1Cc7qchsPJFvX6OG-AD-FpS2j_ZsfWcNj

SPECIAL THANKS TO

Hal9000 for creating my first viewed fan edits and inspiring me – and humouring me.

ThatGuyWhoEdits for helping me with my editing endeavours.

Snooker for introducing me to foreign language editing and for making high-quality edits.

Darth Lunar for being the first – I think – to use foreign language editing and for making The Blackened
Mantle.

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I am very excited for this!

she/her

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I applaud you sir for this is an excellent idea!!

I can answer almost all questions anyone might have about the Sith from Star Wars Legends, and please do PM me for the bd25 DEED(Despecalised Editions), as I have this version, though I can’t answer technical questions about them. Do not go gentle into that good night, Though wise men at their end know dark is right, They
Do not go gentle into that good night.
“Star Wars is a buffet, enjoy the stuff you want, and leave the rest.” - SilverWook
Feel the love.

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 (Edited)

Good work. Yes it’s a bit strange if you understand Italian, even if only a bit.
But the voice acting here is so much better !

I wonder if there was some way to re-dub the movie in english, specially Anakin.
Perhaps some fan with acting skills and a similar voice could do it.

Anyway, for me AOTC only works if you focus it on Padmé.
Reduce the Coruscant scenes to a minimum and go with the trip to Naboo + Naboo scenes.
Anakin should not be the hero here.

What do you have in mind about this ?

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Sounds like a great deal of fun. Looking forward to checking this out!

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I thought the F bombs were a little bit much, but overall I loved the tone and atmosphere you set with those clips. Great work.

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Vladius said:

I thought the F bombs were a little bit much, but overall I loved the tone and atmosphere you set with those clips. Great work.

Thanks a bunch.
And, yeah, I definitely understand that course language could feel gratuitous or out of place.
Come the final edit I’ll likely have som of said course language but I’ll be more conservative with the use.

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4throck said:

Good work. Yes it’s a bit strange if you understand Italian, even if only a bit.
But the voice acting here is so much better !

I wonder if there was some way to re-dub the movie in english, specially Anakin.
Perhaps some fan with acting skills and a similar voice could do it.

Anyway, for me AOTC only works if you focus it on Padmé.
Reduce the Coruscant scenes to a minimum and go with the trip to Naboo + Naboo scenes.
Anakin should not be the hero here.

What do you have in mind about this ?

Yeah, I can assure you for italians this is odd, strange.
(PS: I don’t know other dubbing systems, but the italian one is considered one of the best in general)

Italian faneditor.
EDITS LIST:

  1. CHOSEN ONE - A Star Wars Story: https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/THE-CHOSEN-ONE-A-STAR-WARS-STORY-RELEASED/id/60721
  2. SHADOW OF THE PAST (EpI): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/SHADOW-OF-THE-PAST-A-Phantom-Menace-edit/id/65473
  3. KEEPERS OF THE PEACE (EpII): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/KEEPERS-OF-THE-PEACE-Attack-of-the-Clones-edit/id/66617/page/1#1274835
  4. THE SON OF SKYWALKER (EpIV): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/Star-Wars-Episode-IV-The-Son-of-Skywalker/id/69085

YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsWtMZobefiq04JNuS2jFLQ?view_as=subscriber

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 (Edited)

Yeah, I can assure you for italians this is odd, strange.
(PS: I don’t know other dubbing systems, but the italian one is considered one of the best in general)

Yeah, I thought you’d find it funny / insulting seeing a foreigner butcher your language like this, but, I suppose it’s the trade off for a foreign language edit, probably the reason why so few have been made.

I just thought I’d use the Italian dub to change it up a bit, which is a dub I quite like. It also gives the universe a Latin-like sound, fitting for the fall of the Roman Republic setting.

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No, no, not insulting at all.
Considering that Episode III is based on the fall of the Roman Republic (Palpatine acting like first emperor Augusto) it fits 😉
Of course it remains strange, to hear something and read something else. But I see the point of the edit, and it’s funny.

Italian faneditor.
EDITS LIST:

  1. CHOSEN ONE - A Star Wars Story: https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/THE-CHOSEN-ONE-A-STAR-WARS-STORY-RELEASED/id/60721
  2. SHADOW OF THE PAST (EpI): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/SHADOW-OF-THE-PAST-A-Phantom-Menace-edit/id/65473
  3. KEEPERS OF THE PEACE (EpII): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/KEEPERS-OF-THE-PEACE-Attack-of-the-Clones-edit/id/66617/page/1#1274835
  4. THE SON OF SKYWALKER (EpIV): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/Star-Wars-Episode-IV-The-Son-of-Skywalker/id/69085

YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsWtMZobefiq04JNuS2jFLQ?view_as=subscriber

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 (Edited)

Yeah, if the edit goes well I might have to consider making a track with the Japanese dub, then only those who speak both languages get are screwed!
It’s interesting how different languages butcher foreign / ancient names.
Avgvstvs in Latin, Augusto in Italian, Augustus in English. Strange
I digress.

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Yeah, cause Italian, even if it’s the most direct evolution of Latin (I studied this one for 6 years), is the modernization of ancient Florentine/Tuscan dialect. Every region of Italy developed its own vulgar version of Latin. So of course many many names and words change a little bit.
Res Publica (literally, “public thing”) becomes Repubblica or Republic.
Imperium (not a form of state, but a specific kind of power) becomes Impero or Empire.
I digress too.

But I’m looking forward to this edit 😉

Italian faneditor.
EDITS LIST:

  1. CHOSEN ONE - A Star Wars Story: https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/THE-CHOSEN-ONE-A-STAR-WARS-STORY-RELEASED/id/60721
  2. SHADOW OF THE PAST (EpI): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/SHADOW-OF-THE-PAST-A-Phantom-Menace-edit/id/65473
  3. KEEPERS OF THE PEACE (EpII): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/KEEPERS-OF-THE-PEACE-Attack-of-the-Clones-edit/id/66617/page/1#1274835
  4. THE SON OF SKYWALKER (EpIV): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/Star-Wars-Episode-IV-The-Son-of-Skywalker/id/69085

YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsWtMZobefiq04JNuS2jFLQ?view_as=subscriber

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 (Edited)

Hearing one thing and reading another will not be limited to native Italians.

I speak Portuguese so I can naturally understand some Italian.
And as far as I know Spanish speakers will understand almost everything.
This without needing to study the language. It’s just similar for the reasons mentioned on the posts above (Latin).

So that’s a lot of people around the world that might notice it.
Anyway, I like the dub and it does sound more “classical” 😉

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stickydixon said:
Avgvstvs in Latin, Augusto in Italian, Augustus in English. Strange

English is better, the Latin words are used directly, with no “translation”.

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 (Edited)

4throck said:

So that’s a lot of people around the world that might notice it.

Damn, that’s a definite lapse of judgement on my part.
I should have remembered the similarities between Romance languages.

And, unfortunately, even English speakers can understand when someone is saying: Mother, Mum, Council, Chancellor, Master, Senator, Republic and so on.

I’m feeling like a twonk now

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If you manage to obtain it you could use a less known dub track.
Or you could continue with this one. The new subtitle is what matters.

Italian faneditor.
EDITS LIST:

  1. CHOSEN ONE - A Star Wars Story: https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/THE-CHOSEN-ONE-A-STAR-WARS-STORY-RELEASED/id/60721
  2. SHADOW OF THE PAST (EpI): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/SHADOW-OF-THE-PAST-A-Phantom-Menace-edit/id/65473
  3. KEEPERS OF THE PEACE (EpII): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/KEEPERS-OF-THE-PEACE-Attack-of-the-Clones-edit/id/66617/page/1#1274835
  4. THE SON OF SKYWALKER (EpIV): https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/Star-Wars-Episode-IV-The-Son-of-Skywalker/id/69085

YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsWtMZobefiq04JNuS2jFLQ?view_as=subscriber

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 (Edited)

Please continue! I think you will be OK by acknowledging that in the disclaimer.

Another option would be to mix dubs!
Why not Italian for the Jedi, Japanese for the Sith ? Perhaps keep english for some characters ?
That would make subtitle differences less noticeable.

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Pretty good

I can answer almost all questions anyone might have about the Sith from Star Wars Legends, and please do PM me for the bd25 DEED(Despecalised Editions), as I have this version, though I can’t answer technical questions about them. Do not go gentle into that good night, Though wise men at their end know dark is right, They
Do not go gentle into that good night.
“Star Wars is a buffet, enjoy the stuff you want, and leave the rest.” - SilverWook
Feel the love.