STAR WARS: Last Jedi (The Anti-Cringe-Cut)
This movie was a mess! It managed to subvert fan expectations in the worst way. With it’s pointless twists and turns, unnecessary side plots, some ridiculous character moments and cringe-worthy dialogue it quickly buried my faith in the new STAR WARS franchise. But Episode 8 was not all bad so a spark of hope remained… Maybe with some cuts here and there, it could be possible to redeem this movie. So I did exactly that! I proudly present my first Anti-Cringe-Cut with the following cut-list:
- The blonde rebel girl in the beginning saying “Oh no” as she sees the Star Destroyers popping up
- The silly face General Hux makes while looking at his officer when Poe approaches them alone
- Poe “phone pranking” General Hux at the beginning
- BB8’s Whack-A-Mole joke and bashing his head into the circuit to repair Poe’s ship cannons
- Aerial shot of Rey walking up to Luke
- Luke throwing away his light saber and Rey retrieving it later
- Almost all Porg scenes
- Rey explaining to Luke what Chewbacca is saying after they burst into his hut
- Luke’s weird milking scene
- Leia coming back from the dead after being sucked out into space
- All of Leia’s appearances after her “death”
- Admiral Holdo berating Poe
- Poe being frustrated about Admiral Holdo’s behavior
- Poe’s coup against Admiral Holdo
- Maz Kanata’s silly phone call
- Finn’s side quest on Canto Bight (and the whole Code-breaker nonsense)
- Rose’s introduction
- Rey nearly killing the island nuns with a rock
- Luke falling down after Rey hits him on the head from behind.
- Captain Phasma
- BB8 going on a killing spree
- Finn trying to sacrifice himself in the battle on Crait and Rose “saving” him
- Rose kissing Finn while the Rebel Base is being blown up in the background
- Luke dying
- Deleted scene where Poe is getting a distress call from the rebel base in the beginning
- Deleted scene where Luke is mourning Han
- Deleted scene where the island nuns are introduced
- Deleted scene where Poe explains to Finn what happened while he was in a coma
- Deleted scene showing Luke’s third lesson to Rey (involving the island natives)
- Two aerial shots from a documentary of Skellige island (Ahch-To island) that serve as transitions between scenes
- Some classic Star Wars scene transitions here and there
- Background music in some scenes and scene transitions (only using the OST for The Last Jedi)
- The intro crawl text changed slightly to include that Snoke has been training “his apprentice Kylo Ren” and that the rebels are certain that “young Rey will find Luke Skywalker and with his help restore a spark of hope to the fight”.
- Moved the scene where Leia tells C3PO to “whipe that nervous expression off his face” to right after the Dreadnought cannons move to point on the rebel cruiser making it a better fit
- The first battle against the Dreadnought is much more fluid and intense now and not broken up by silly jokes
- Leia dies in the second assault of the First Order
- Luke has a vision of Leia floating in space after he reconnects with the force
- Instead of throwing away the light saber, Luke gives it back to Rey and tells her that he’s sorry before walking off, making her confused expression right after, more believable.
- Luke now seems more skilled in the fight with Rey. He doesn’t fall down, after she hits him on the head the first time but immediately turns around to stop her second strike at which point he hears Master Yoda’s voice telling him not to attack her. This results in him just dodging her hits and staying on the defensive. The one time he falls down now, he breaks his fall with the force, showing us that he could have easily beaten her if he wanted to.
- When Poe asks Admiral Holdo, if she has a plan, it now seems like she tells him what the mission is. When they leave her alone on the cruiser and Poe leaves with the transport ships, it looks like they are working together.
- The reveal that Rose is Paige’s sister comes much later in the last act on Crait. hen she touches the second half of the medalion as she is flying towards the large cannon, creating a better connection/contrast to the beginning of the movie. Her sister died in battle, she survives.
- When Poe tells Finn to pull back, it now looks like he is following his order
- Luke makes his last stand with a green light saber instead of the blue one making the reveal, that he is not really there, more surprising.
- The movie ends with Luke surviving and looking out at the sunset, coming full circle. He looked at it as a baby in “Revenge of the Sith”, as a young man in “A New Hope” and finally as an old Jedi Master.
- After credits scene with Chewbacca (if you watched the Anti-Cringe trailer, you’ve seen it already)
- Color grading of the whole movie (greenish/yellow tint removed and more color vibrance)
Running Time: 110 minutes
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