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I can see how Jyn’s passiveness can be seen as less of an issue by being focused more on Cassian, but I think making Jyn a more active protagonist would benefit Cassian in the long run, too.
Just like how the characters Cassian interacts with in Andor are molding him into the rebel we’ll see in Rogue One, Cassian also sort of molds Jyn into a rebel that believes in the cause, just like him.
Really, the biggest change to Cassian’s story in this version would be that Draden doesn’t tell him to kill Galen until they are on their way to Eadu, rather than before they leave for Jedha. I think this might work better because it holds off on this story element until it becomes relevant (when they actually are on their way to rescue/kill her father). I nice little “oh shit” moment to jump into this act. I also would slightly change their argument after they escape Eadu, so it ends with Cassian saying, “You’re not the only one who lost everything. Some of us just decided to do something about it” which I’m hoping will highlight this moment as the inspiration Jyn needs to give her speech to the Rebel Council. Instead of Jyn saying, “You can’t talk your way out of this”, her not saying anything in response might make it seem like Jyn actually is starting to see the point he is trying to make. The way the conversation ends, it seems like Jyn would be fed up with the Rebellion for being responsible for her father’s death and wouldn’t put the effort into trying to work with them. With this, the scene ends with Jyn soaking in Cassian’s words, which kind of makes her realize that regardless of what happened on Eadu, she has to do something and make a case to the Rebellion so her father’s death isn’t in vain. At least that’s the idea.
I’m not sure how I will do it yet (perhaps with BTS and unused trailer footage), but I would also like to make it where Cassian is present for that speech. I like the idea of Cassian being there to hear Jyn repeat his words “Rebellions are built on hope” and to see how he has had an impact of Jyn’s change of perspective throughout the movie. It could just help bring Cassian’s journey full circle in a way. And then after her speech he puts that crew together for the mission.
I agree that two episodes make the most sense. I’ll have to play around with breaking it up and see what feels like the most natural place to split the film. And yeah, Andor might inspire me to try to bring the tone more in-line with the series, when possible. If you end having any thoughts regarding that as the series continues feel free to share them!
Yeah, I know the inclusion/exclusion of the Vader hallway scene will be a matter of debate. On one hand, it feels gratuitous, and I kind of like the idea of not really a proper glimpse of Vader until A New Hope. Though the second season of Andor could change that, who knows. And it is kind of funny to think that will go to this badass hallway scene to the more toned down duel between Vader and Obi-Wan. I also kinda like the idea of fading to white with the explosion, and fading back in to the white halls of the Tantive IV.
On the other hand, I do like how it highlights the mission as this baton pass between these rebels that history will forget. Again, maybe I could just make it so the data tape being passed along is less obvious to Vader. If that rebel doesn’t shout “Take it!” you could argue that Vader may have not noticed a data tape being handed off at all. And the edit might always feel like something is missing without it. It’s something to think about. At the very least, I won’t have Vader watch it literally fly away.
Yeah, I’ll have to post on the ROTJ community thread and share some more thoughts I have had about it! Would be fun to get something out for the 40th anniversary next year.
EDIT: Will also say that I’m definitely leaning more in the direction of a “less is more” editing strategy for this edit. I feel like dramatic restructuring would require a lot of work and honestly don’t want to waste a lot of effort on this. So most edits would be a matter of cutting/altering dialogue, and trimming scenes here and there in order to convey the story and character changes I want to make. Hopefully someone would watch this, not notice a lot of the changes I made to the story, and be like, “Huh, that was a lot better than I remember it being.” Really the most drastic exclusions I’d consider would be cutting the early Saw/Bodhi scenes, as well as the scene of Krennic visiting Vader.