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I need help

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I called a friend today. And her dad picked up the phone. He asked me my age, where I got the number, where I lived, and then he told me she couldn't talk to boys. I hope I didn't get her in trouble or anything. Now I am in love with this girl and she likes me what should I do?

Why the fuck does the perfect girl for me have to have a crazy father?
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Before your questions can be answered properly I am going to need some additional info:

1. How old are you?
2. How old is she?
3. How did you meet her?
4. How did you get her phone number?
5. Do you both live in the same town or city?

HARMY RULES

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1. 17
2. 15
3. School
4........HEY I SEE WHAT YOUR TRYING TO DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Yeah, you just graduated from high school, didn't you? So I'd assume this girl would be about the same age (17 or 18), so this father would have to be really crazy if he's that overprotective. However, if she's young enough where a father might understandably still be wary of boys (say 11 or 12 at the most), then there's a problem.

EDIT: Well, you just barely beat me to the punch. At that age, two years can be considered something of a big difference. Still seems pretty old to have her father screening her calls, though. Despite rob's joke, though, that information is somewhat relevant to the topic.

There is no lingerie in space…

C3PX said: Gaffer is like that hot girl in high school that you think you have a chance with even though she is way out of your league because she is sweet and not a stuck up bitch who pretends you don’t exist… then one day you spot her making out with some skinny twerp, only on second glance you realize it is the goth girl who always sits in the back of class; at that moment it dawns on you why she is never seen hanging off the arm of any of the jocks… and you realize, damn, she really is unobtainable after all. Not that that is going to stop you from dreaming… Only in this case, Gaffer is actually a guy.

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This is her step father, I heard he doesn't even let her go out of the house. I mean WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!! I heard she was somewhat normal a few years ago. I hope I didn't get her in trouble by calling her.
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I'd say you're either going to wait for the girl's dad to stop being over protective or move on to someone else. At fifteen she really doesn't have any authoritai to date if her dad doesn't want her to.

4

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You fags are so used to me twisting your pickles that you thought I was making a joke. I was actaully trying to figure out whether this is some girl that gave Sean her number in person, or whether they met over the net and she asked him to call her by phone. In either case if she is fifteen her father has every right to be concerned about older boys calling. If I wasn't such a fruitcake and I had a 15 year old daughter I would be very concerned if a 17 year old boy was calling the house. I would recommend 1 of 2 courses of action for you.

1. Forget about this girl and move on
2. Wait until this girl is no longer a minor to pursue a relationship

* A 15 year old girl coupled with a protective father is a recipe for prison time.

HARMY RULES

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This girl doesn't really have any other friends. I mean we are like freaking tight. I won't pursue a relationship for now but I will stay friends. Since I have to take a book back to school tomorrow I'll visit her and ask her about it. She is kind of cute too. It would be creepy if he found the senior picture I gave her. Also she told me he said "I wish you were dead" to her. That is one of the reasons I became friends with her I just don't want to see her get hurt, I want to see her happy.

Rememeber she only knows the nice, sweet, non-perverted, 17 year-old boy that walks her to class and gives her hugs (Sometimes we all need a hug, for her it's all the time).

I'm never giving up, NEVER!!
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I have heard of step-fathers being way over protective of the step-daughters more than once. My advice since he is not her real father and her safety and relationships actually fall into the hands of her real mother who is related to her by blood, I would say definitely do not give up.

Now about something else I thought about while reading your posts, sean wookie, I am going to go into some fuzzy territory right here so forgive me, but do you know if the step father abuses her in any way? With the comment you said her step-father made about her, and him wanting her to have no relationships ( meaning possibly he wants to be the only guy in her life ), and her not having many friends ( which could mean she is reclusive which can come from mental or physical abuse ), and she is at that age where the step-father can still maintane controll over her. Also, he does not let her go out of the house, which can also mean he is very possesive and does not like it when he does not know what she is doing. And I do not know if you meant it this way, but the fact that she needs lots of hugs means she is a sign of emotional abuse. All this can point to many kinds of abuse. I have seen so many abuse cases with step-fathers that I may be overthinking this, but for some reasons the way you described his reaction to you calling her something about it just does not feel right to me. I am not telling you to come right out and ask her if she is having any problems at home, but keep an eye on here and her home life. Once again I may be overthinking this, but all the signs are there.


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Originally posted by: Marvolo
I have heard of step-fathers being way over protective of the step-daughters more than once. My advice since he is not her real father and her safety and relationships actually fall into the hands of her real mother who is related to her by blood, I would say definitely do not give up.

Now about something else I thought about while reading your posts, sean wookie, I am going to go into some fuzzy territory right here so forgive me, but do you know if the step father abuses her in any way? With the comment you said her step-father made about her, and him wanting her to have no relationships ( meaning possibly he wants to be the only guy in her life ), and her not having many friends ( which could mean she is reclusive which can come from mental or physical abuse ), and she is at that age where the step-father can still maintane controll over her. Also, he does not let her go out of the house, which can also mean he is very possesive and does not like it when he does not know what she is doing. And I do not know if you meant it this way, but the fact that she needs lots of hugs means she is a sign of emotional abuse. All this can point to many kinds of abuse. I have seen so many abuse cases with step-fathers that I may be overthinking this, but for some reasons the way you described his reaction to you calling her something about it just does not feel right to me. I am not telling you to come right out and ask her if she is having any problems at home, but keep an eye on here and her home life. Once again I may be overthinking this, but all the signs are there.


I actually thinking about how abuse might be there too. I'm going to vist it her at school tommorow to see how she is it might be the last chance I'll get to see her in real life. Unless her dad tell her never to talk to me. I don't know what will stop me from reaching out to her. I told her today she is my best friend ever and how much I care and love her and stuff like that.
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Love is quite a strong word for the age of 17, not to diminish your feelings man. However, this situation sounds like it will eventually lead to problems for you. As suggested before, hang around and be there for her until she can be on her own, then see what happens or move on.
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Originally posted by: sean wookie


I actually thinking about how abuse might be there too. I'm going to vist it her at school tommorow to see how she is it might be the last chance I'll get to see her in real life. Unless her dad tell her never to talk to me. I don't know what will stop me from reaching out to her. I told her today she is my best friend ever and how much I care and love her and stuff like that.


One way you may be able to tell if she is being abused is if she completely rejects you when you see her next time. If you say something like "We can still be friends, and still hang out", and she replies with something around the lines of "No, that is not good. We should not see each other anymore. It is for the best. My step-father was right. I am too young." And if she does say something like this ask her why and if she replies with anything like "I can't tell you" then more than likely something is definitely going on that is not good. I hope that this not the case, but some people end up in situations like this. So, it is definitely a possibility. Keep us posted on what happens.


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You and I seem to think a lot alike, Marvolo. Though I would hope her father isn't abusive, his description by Sean makes me think along those lines. At the very least it sounds like his personality might be overpowering hers. :\

Originally posted by: sean wookie
This girl doesn't really have any other friends. I mean we are like freaking tight.


Based on that, Sean, I would definitely say that this girl is not a good candidate for you to date right now. Your decision not to have a relationship with her is a very wise one. You yourself are very new to romantic relationships, correct? If so, it's best to take them slowly (though I think its always good to take romance slowly).

In terms of your friend, her life is very closed off and I'm guessing she probably has a very low opinion of herself. Your job, as her friend, is to encourage her to be more confident and outgoing so that she can be her own person in terms of how she relates to other people. (Help her to gain other friends and be there to lift her spirits.) When and only when she has actually grown in those ways would romance be a good thing to pursue (in my opinion).

"Now all Lucas has to do is make a cgi version of himself.  It will be better than the original and fit his original vision." - skyjedi2005

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Reminds me of one of my girl friends----she was one of those super-super A,A,A,A,A,A,A, over-archivers to boot--with those strict parents--we were able to get on the phone every now and then, but after a few weeks, every night at 8 was when we'd talk----------after about 6 months, they "warmed up to me" but two weeks after that, I broke up with her.
Now I get looks/pointed at during school/band functions.
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Things aren't going well I haven't seen her since school ended she took me off her top 10 on her blog and has been ignoring my messages. I bet it is her parents again.
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There is no way you probably won't be offended by this but take the hint dude. Move on.

I love everybody. Lets all smoke some reefer and chill. Hug and kisses for everybody.

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I have the only reason I responded is I was asked what was going on.
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Originally posted by: sean wookie
I have the only reason I responded is I was asked what was going on.


Yeah, vbangle, I did ask him. I was just curious as to what was going on. Sad to see, but I am sure there is a much better woman waiting at the end of Sean's single life. If this girl is being sexually molested, she will most likely turn out to be bad news in the future. Sadly, in my experience, a majority of of these terribly violated girls become addicted to drugs or are extremely sexually promiscuous, things most men who want a wife and children with a normal life do not need. Thanks for responding Sean, I'm sure in the end you'll be glad things turned out the way they did.
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I will never desert her because she means too much to me. I'm getting some friends up north (girls) to call her so can get through to her. Maybe I should look other places for romance.
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I hung out with a friend today and I got my friend to call her. I them talked to her She seemed fine, probably happy I called. I've learned something. I've learned that the problems of two little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. We'll always have High School. (I'd like to see that movie)