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Girl Problem

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ok my friend i need a lil info are you in the same grade as her. what do you know about her.

k what i would do is try to find situations where you and her will be doing something at the same time. if you cant think of one find one. if she's looking for a book in the library you go look for one too, something like this. but there is a very fine line you NEED to interact with her when you are in there, ask her things, talk to her about things. constantly ask her about her, girls love attention. talk about school, talk about events that are funny. find things she is interested in, (learn about them in your own time) then talk to her aobut them. maybe she is a closet SW fan.( again this doesnt mean ask her directly, you need to probe around the topic). I know this is going to come off as really complicated but ill tell you this much i used to be in the same boat as you. there was a girl in my senoir year that i liked so for like 2 months i talked to her and i sent her flower on valintines day and so on. anyway i could have asked her to grad in like march of that year instead i waited till may and by that time she was going with someone else. this happened cus i didnt jump on the oppertunity, i'll never in my life make that mistake again.


act yourself.( that doesnt mean talk about Scifi things all the time) if you act like something your not, then you are going to come off as being very odd. try to relax when you are with her. And if she doesnt like who you are then she is not worth the effort its that simple.

oh and here is a trick that i often use now, find something that you have done that is really really cool. e.g. ill talk about how i have gone ice climbing, or that i am scuba diver or another good one is how i have worked with ESL students for 8 years and went to japan on exchange. this will only work if you have the right experences though.

your first goal is to get her email address so you can talk to her on MSN and stuff. i swear MSN is gold if you can get a very good indication of whats going on.

thats all i can offer for now cus i dont know that much about the situation.

oh and i almost forgot always displace confidence (even if you dont feel confident, bit your lip and be it), and be free spirited.
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OK I'm not a speciallist on that particular subject - I'm probably the WORSE person to give advice on that. But...

Yes, these are hints that she might like you. But that's it. I'm sure there are a lot of other people who like you and who behave on a similar way. Perhaps she just wants you two to be friends? And if so, what's wrong with that?

For what you've said, you two don't talk much, and are not particulary close. Perhaps you were afraid of rejection and built walls instead of bridges, and you weren't able to get closer to her as you wish.

I must say 2 months is too short time for one to get close enough to someone, but you could try. Talk to her, don't worry about what, just talk to her. If it is suppose to happen, then it'll happen no matter what. If, for some reason, you two don't get close and she moves away from you, well, that's how it was supposed to be, that's life goes. But don't worry, soon you'll meet many people on your life and you'll have plenty of oportunities to meet other people... You're still young, and life you'll teach you many things, you'll have disapointments and you'll have good moments...

I think the best advice I've heard about the subject was said by Thom Yorke (from Radiohead), and I quote:

"If you have been rejected many times in your life, then one more rejection then one more rejection isn't going to make much difference. If you're rejected, don't automatically assume it's your fault. The other person may have several reasons for not doing what you're asking her to do: none of it may have anything to do with you. Perhaps the person is busy or not feeling well or genuinely not interested in spending time with you. Rejections are part of everyday life. Don't let them bother you. Keep reaching out to others. Keep reaching out to others. When you begin to recieve positive responses, then you are on the right track. It's all a matter of numbers. Count the positive responses and forget about the rejections."
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
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Whatever you do, don't look at me. I am the last person in the world to take advice about girls from.

You know she would probably kill you if she ever found out about you putting her picture up like that.

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Like Ric, I'm no specialist...in fact I'm probably the last person you'd want to hear from. Try being a 24 year old SW geek who's never had a girlfriend and is still living in his parent's attic.
However, strange as it may seem, I was and still am in a similar situation. Girl I knew since 8th grade. I could never bring myself to say anything. Graduation came, and I didn't say anything. Saw her a couple times in college...still couldn't bring myself to do anything.
To this day, I still think about what I want to tell her, but I still don't know if I can break my silence. I wish to badly that I could see her before the 10 year reunion for HS graduation, assuming there even is one, but at the rate I'm going, I don't see that happening.

Best Case Scenario: She does like you, and you need to just say something, no matter how awkward it may come out. If it helps, mentally rehearse it. Have everything you're going to say worked out long before you pick the moment to say anything.
If you know of some common ground where you can start your conversation at, that may also help you feel more comfortable.

Worst Case Scenario: She feels sorry for you (for some reason) and she's only being nice because of it. There's practically no chance of this, but one never knows.
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i dont know if they are right or not, i would say that 2 months would be more then enough time to get into a good relationship with someone. infact from my experience if you start off to slow you'll ruin your chances to get into a relationship. its funny her at university me and my buddies have come with model. with girls there are 2 ladders, the relationship ladder and the friends ladder. and the further up you get on one of then the further you have to jump to get onto the other. if you start a relationship really slowly you will by default go up the friends ladder.

but i can understand from experence it is very hard to follow my advice when it comes down to it. so your goal would be to get into a position where you guys can stay in touch outside of school. another thing is all of those signs you mentioned are very interesting like they said b4 they could mean she wants to be friends or something else, in either case she likes you which is good.

as for the quite person thing i know its tough, trust me i was really really quite in highschool, but you have to break out of it. i guess it had to take the incident i mentioned above to make me do it but still i did. and i went to a highschool of 400 too, my class had 60 students in it.

oh another thing my advice b4 about showering her with attention that might be a bad idea, i cant call it cus i dont know you or her. these are the two possible situations and you can decide what to do. she will either like you for it because unlike other guys you are interested in her interests and who she is. the other possiblity is that she will get annoyed cus every body is always bothering her about that kind of stuff and she doesnt like to tell everyone who she is. if that is the case what i would suggest is to find a common ground and use that a a starting point and spread from there. or try my trick where you find something unique about you and talk to her about it.
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I don't wanna sound negative or anything of the sort, I really do hope that you and that girl do get along, but... maybe it's my experience, but those "one-sided" relationships don't feel natural to me. Like when this boy or this girl is interested on another girl or boy, but he/she dosen't seem to notice him/her... Or when someone try to "push" someone to you, like another friend who is also alone and stuff... From personal experiences, these kinds of relationships don't seem to work... Every single sucessful relationship that I've witnessed started with both sides neutral about each other, and then sharing interests and talking to each other, and slowly both sides get to love each other...

But hey, do prove me wrong and talk to this girl. What's the worse thing that can happen? I mean, think about the opposite situation. What if a girl you're not interested in comes up to you and talks to you and implies she's interested in you? I hope you won't do anything barbaric such as humiliating her, you'll just be polite and talk to her and say you might still be a friend to her and stuff... Right? So talk to her unafraid, if you're actually AFRAID of talking to someone, then there's something wrong and unnatural about it. I mean, are you afraid to talk to your parents or your friends? No of course not. So if you want a relationship with this girl to work out, then you must not have worries in your mind when talking to her.

By the way, Chaltab is right. You shouldn't have posted her photo here... Edit your post and remove it...
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
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If what you say is true, then she certainly doesn't mind looking at you. What this means in her mind is still a mystery, though. For all you know, she could be simply entertaining the idea of talking/being with you, but would never actually do so.

My advice: You know she's leaving, so ask her about where she's going. Make her talk about what's going on in her life - there's no better way to find out than to hear it from her. Does she know where she's going, where she's going to live, how long she's going to be there, etc. Casually say something like "I know we don't talk much, but I'll probably miss you when you're gone." Just try make it sound like you would miss her as a friend.

I really wouldn't expect too much from her if she's leaving soon. She ultimately may not be interested in that way, or may not want to start something that'll end so soon, so don't be thinking that you may "hook-up". At the very least, this will be your chance to have a heart-to-heart talk with her, so you don't spend the rest of your life wondering what you could have said to her.

Of course, if it turns out she's not interested, or one of you gets embarrassed, then she'll be gone in two months, and you'll be able to get on with your life.

<span class=“Italics”>MeBeJedi: Sadly, I believe the prequels are beyond repair.
<span class=“Bold”>JediRandy: They’re certainly beyond any repair you’re capable of making.</span></span>

<span class=“Italics”>MeBeJedi: You aren’t one of us.
<span class=“Bold”>Go-Mer-Tonic: I can’t say I find that very disappointing.</span></span>

<span class=“Italics”>JediRandy: I won’t suck as much as a fan edit.</span>

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Originally posted by: Darth Chaltab
Whatever you do, don't look at me. I am the last person in the world to take advice about girls from.

You know she would probably kill you if she ever found out about you putting her picture up like that.


ditto.


E!-A!-G!-L!-E!-S! EAGLES!!!
SUPERBOWL LII CHAMPS!!!

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When I got an hour to kill, I'll tell you all my current girl problem...it's almost a funny story if it wasn't true and happening to me currently.
Which is the more foolish, the fool (the OT) or the fool who follows (the PT)?

"Stay back, or Mr...Fett gets it!"
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Right, ignore everything you've just read (except what MebeJedi said), don't show off about how you went ice climbing or any of that crap and don't try to be in the same place at the same time or whatever because that is stalking. Here's what you need to do - be yourself. If she doesn't like the real you then who cares? Go up to her, say hello, have a chat. Do it before she leaves because you'll regret it if you don't. If it all goes wrong and she thinks you're an idiot, in 100 years, who's gonna care? In fact, in 6 months who's gonna care? Nobody. But if you don't try you will never know. So just keep it simple and say hello and see what happens.

War does not make one great.

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Being a person who was never great at asking girls out in high school and even worse at picking up on hints, I have since learned that many girls floated hints my way and I was just too dense to figure it out. Based on what they've told me about their hinting, it sounds like this girl is definitely dropping a few your way.

The best thing I can think to do is just suck it up and ask. That's all you can do. Catch her some time when she's alone (less chance of embarrassment) and just walk up to her. Don't ask about going out on a date. Just say something simple like, "I was wondering if you want to go get some coffee after school" or the like. If she says yes, use this as an opportunity to talk and get to know her. And make it about her. You obviously know a few things about her. Use those as conversation starters.

All you can do is ask and all she can do is say no. At best, she'll say yes. You won't know until you try and you'll regret it forever afterwards if you do not.

Good luck my young Padawan.
"You fell victim to one of the classic blunders, the most famous of which is 'Never get involved in a land war in Asia'."
--Vizzini (Wallace Shawn), The Princess Bride
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Kevin A
Webmaster/Primary Cynic
kapgar.typepad.com
kapgar.com
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...and let us know if you kiss her.

<span class=“Italics”>MeBeJedi: Sadly, I believe the prequels are beyond repair.
<span class=“Bold”>JediRandy: They’re certainly beyond any repair you’re capable of making.</span></span>

<span class=“Italics”>MeBeJedi: You aren’t one of us.
<span class=“Bold”>Go-Mer-Tonic: I can’t say I find that very disappointing.</span></span>

<span class=“Italics”>JediRandy: I won’t suck as much as a fan edit.</span>

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The best advice I ever received about women is this:

All girls are geeks. That's why we didn't hang out with them in grade school.

Take it from someone who, like Bossk, passed up a lot of female company because he was too stupid to read the signs: she's interested.

Ask her to have coffee with you. It's that easy.

Don't take advice on what to say. You don't want to craft your speech to make her interested. Be yourself, and if she's not interested, she was never meant to be.

Good luck my son.
originaltrilogy.com Administrator

MTFBWY…A

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And if you don't take our fair Emperor's advice, he'll Force lightning your arse!
"You fell victim to one of the classic blunders, the most famous of which is 'Never get involved in a land war in Asia'."
--Vizzini (Wallace Shawn), The Princess Bride
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Kevin A
Webmaster/Primary Cynic
kapgar.typepad.com
kapgar.com
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Quote

Originally posted by: HotRod
Just get her pissed!!


AMEN
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering
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Originally posted by: HotRod
Just get her pissed!!
Then why'd we want him to take the picture down? Seems she'd get pi...

*unintelligible whispering in the background

Wait...were you using that word in its more Scottish/Irish context?

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A guy asks his best friend for some advice on asking a girl out.

His friend suggests, "Take her out to see the latest movie, then go to a nice dinner, and finally take her for a drive up the mountains. Find a secluded spot, park the car, look her in the eye and say 'put out, or get out.' This works every time for me."

The guy thinks this is a good plan, but then again, he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer either. Anyways, he picks up the girl, they have a great time at the movie, a wonderful dinner, and she has a sparkle in her eye when he suggests they drive up the mountains.

After finding a secluded spot, the guy parks the car, looks the girl in the eye, and says, "Get out, or I'll put you out."



(P.S. This is not good advice for a first date. )

<span class=“Italics”>MeBeJedi: Sadly, I believe the prequels are beyond repair.
<span class=“Bold”>JediRandy: They’re certainly beyond any repair you’re capable of making.</span></span>

<span class=“Italics”>MeBeJedi: You aren’t one of us.
<span class=“Bold”>Go-Mer-Tonic: I can’t say I find that very disappointing.</span></span>

<span class=“Italics”>JediRandy: I won’t suck as much as a fan edit.</span>

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And I didn't have the opportunity to see the picture. Dang.

Well, good luck all the same, Davis.
"You fell victim to one of the classic blunders, the most famous of which is 'Never get involved in a land war in Asia'."
--Vizzini (Wallace Shawn), The Princess Bride
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Kevin A
Webmaster/Primary Cynic
kapgar.typepad.com
kapgar.com
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That's one good looking gal you have there!

I have two bits of advice:

1. SMILE
2. Make eye contact

Eye contact is everything! When you look into her eyes, you display confidence and also the fact that you are interested. Look away, or look at the floor, and you've made a big mistake.

SMILE! I think perhaps you're taking this too seriously and are acting stiff and nervous because of it. Smiling lets her know that you could be fun to be with, and not boring. Girls don't like boring guys. I know firsthand about that.

Walk with your back straight, slowly but calmly. Smile, look her in the eyes, demonstrate interest in her, and display the utmost confidence; otherwise, she'll think you're just a "kid" and move on to other things (which she might do anyway).

But have hope; you could make some serious headway in two months if you do it right. And from what you say it sounds like she does like you for one reason or another, so it'll be a little easier than starting off cold.

Good luck!

Episode II: Shroud of the Dark Side

Emperor Jar-Jar
“Back when we made Star Wars, we just couldn’t make Palpatine as evil as we intended. Now, thanks to the miracles of technology, it is finally possible. Finally, I’ve created the movies that I originally imagined.” -George Lucas on the 2007 Extra Extra Special HD-DVD Edition

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You put her pic online again? Why? Imagine if she finds out she's the most visited topic on a geeky "Star Wars original trilogy" forum...
“Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in any country.” — Nazi Reich Marshal Hermann Goering