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Episode II: Shroud of the Dark Side (the TM edit) (Released) — Page 27

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It seems as though you're feeling overwhelmed right now, TM. That's why you need to quit your job and work on SOTDS full time! Really. We'll take up a collection, pay your mortgage, whatever's necessary.

Seriously though, the funny thing is, I've been thinking about volunteering to edit Episode I while Trooperman was busy working on II and III, but I didn't want to step on anyone's toes. The ideas put forth here recently by MTHaslett and Commander Courage, however, are causing me to really want to do this.

I'd like to get the kinks worked out with using my equipment before I commit to anything, but that might take less time than I originally expected.

I'll work on it over the next few days and keep you guys posted.

--InfoDroid

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InfoDroid, sorry I left you off the 'voulenteer list," I didn't realize you already had the resources to take on such a project. Someone like you who already knows what he's doing is a far better choice than someone like me who's just getting started in the world of editing. Not that I wouldn't want to learn the intricacies of it all at some point, but I'd probably slow things down even more while going through a learning curve. Do keep us posted on whether or not you think you'd be able to tackle Episode I.

And here's a crazy thought: Wouldn't it be nice for I and II to be completed around the same time? Being able to watch this "alternative saga" chronologically would go a long way in its effectiveness if that's what we're going for (a 1-6 flow). With these new strategies, while it probably won't be possible for I to come out before II, we can at least try to get them out in the same year as opposed to I coming 2 or 3 years down the line as originally planned. My only reservation with this would be waiting for the inevitable CGI Yoda that will be replace the TPM puppet in a future release, but we can cross that bridge when we come to it.
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"You could stop right now just to spite us all; we'd be in quite a predicament if that happened now wouldn't we?"

Ha ha!! OK, that was a lot of fun, guys. Look at all the fun we had brainstorming! But someone else is going to have to do it. This whole thing is a joke. Bye. ()

It’s not so much that I’m overwhelmed, or intimidated, or that I don’t want all the work (a lot of it’s quite fun, actually); it’s just that I’m recognizing that one person doing the movies one at a time is going to take awhile. And my feelings on Episode I are not as strong as the ones some of you like MTH have; I think MagnoliaFan was on the right general track with that (with some smoother alien languages). And Episode I is the movie that I would not be required to do personally. Episode III will probably come out in 2007. That would put Episode I at 2008 or 2009. That’s a long time, particularly when there are other parties interested in doing a very thorough stylistic recutting and reconstruction like I’m doing. I didn’t mean to leave anyone out; the interest in editing Ep. I is wonderful; I really appreciate it.

“And here's a crazy thought: Wouldn't it be nice for I and II to be completed around the same time?”

Yes, that would be nice; I’ve kind of screwed things up with my decision to start in the middle of the trilogy. But here’s another crazy thought- what if we all agreed on what we were going to do and spread out the workload? MTH gets a 30 min. chunk, CC gets 30 min., InfoDroid gets 30 min., and I get 30 min. The only issue at that point would be that everyone would have to mail their finished work and I’d have to go through and make sure the editing styles were consistent from piece to piece and unify the whole thing, which might not be a problem if we analyzed it all beforehand. Four different editors working simultaneously, able to concentrate on a specific, shorter piece. Think about how much more time and quality we’d be able to pour into it efficiently if we each did part of it! It’s never been done before and it’d be the ultimate in collaboration between us. For the DVD commentary, we could even have each editor talking while his section of the movie is playing, and put together a four-person commentary track.

I’m REALLY liking this idea…

More later, of course

Episode II: Shroud of the Dark Side

Emperor Jar-Jar
“Back when we made Star Wars, we just couldn’t make Palpatine as evil as we intended. Now, thanks to the miracles of technology, it is finally possible. Finally, I’ve created the movies that I originally imagined.” -George Lucas on the 2007 Extra Extra Special HD-DVD Edition

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Originally posted by: Trooperman
But here’s another crazy thought- what if we all agreed on what we were going to do and spread out the workload? MTH gets a 30 min. chunk, CC gets 30 min., InfoDroid gets 30 min., and I get 30 min. The only issue at that point would be that everyone would have to mail their finished work and I’d have to go through and make sure the editing styles were consistent from piece to piece and unify the whole thing, which might not be a problem if we analyzed it all beforehand. Four different editors working simultaneously, able to concentrate on a specific, shorter piece. Think about how much more time and quality we’d be able to pour into it efficiently if we each did part of it! It’s never been done before and it’d be the ultimate in collaboration between us. For the DVD commentary, we could even have each editor talking while his section of the movie is playing, and put together a four-person commentary track.


Now that IS an interesting idea!

P.S. - I've got a rough clip I've edited just as a test that incorporates some of MTH's ideas for the scene in Ben's Hut during ANH. Still having some export issues. But, I should have this for your downloading and viewing pleasure hopefully by the end of the week.

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THX: MTHaslett - somebody has to get you onto some editing software! Your analysis and reconstruction of TPM is the best I've read, bar none. All your ideas are streamlined and coherent. The trouble is, you'll never be satisfied with an edit which uses some of your ideas and leaves out others. So please, do your own edit.

***

Thanks for the kind words. I think when you go through this thread, you'll see how often I've been shaken off bad ideas and shown better ones, so I feel confident I'll be more than satisfied with Trooperman's work.

But...
InfoDroid and Trooperman and Commander Courage all editing Episode I together!? That sounds like a topic worthy of another thread!

I'd love to join in the fun, but can officially rule it out until spring. But at that point, maybe I could jump in for a last minute "hands-on" contribution.

I guess we probably need to start with the "bible" that Demon Hunter talked about.

---

InfoDroid -- I can't wait to see Ben's Hut!! How's it working out?! You know we're going to Hell for this, right?

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Originally posted by: MTHaslett
But...
InfoDroid and Trooperman and Commander Courage all editing Episode I together!? That sounds like a topic worthy of another thread!

If everyone is serious about it, then we should start it. The first collective fan-edit... Stone soup style.

I'd love to join in the fun, but can officially rule it out until spring. But at that point, maybe I could jump in for a last minute "hands-on" contribution.

So just help handle the writing aspect of it for now.

I guess we probably need to start with the "bible" that Demon Hunter talked about.


Definitely. That's something we can start right away. So, let the brainstorming and debates begin! We can talk it out until we solidify the direction we're taking.

InfoDroid -- I can't wait to see Ben's Hut!! How's it working out?! You know we're going to Hell for this, right?


We're definitely going to Hell, but hey... Take comfort in the fact that we can blame Lucas for being the first to defile that holy ground. My view is this:

-we can have the original OT preserved for when we're feeling sentimental about the better portion of the 70's and 80's spent building forts for our action figures and eating C-3PO's for breakfast.

-we can have the special edition DVD for the times we feel like drinking George Lucas' poison Kool-Aid.

-AND we can have the one we watch when we want to share the entire saga with our friends and family as one long movie - and that's the one we're making.

P.S. - Trooperman, if it's against your religious beliefs, you don't have to contribute to the OT if you don't want to. Really. We understand.

This is my proposal: MTHaslett, Commander Courage, Trooperman and myself should be the primary contributors to this project. If MTHaslett and Commander Courage can duke it out until we're able to come up with a (feasible while compelling) "bible", then I should be able to handle the bulk of the basic editing work, then Trooperman can put the final finishing touches on it. Things like the opening crawl someone else will have to handle, because I haven't a clue how to go about that. But, I'm sure if we all pool our resources on this board we can make things happen rather quickly.

If you're all in agreement with that, then we can take it from there.

As a token of my good will... I present to you a gift...

Ben's Revelation

This is a link to my edit of the Ben's Hut scene in ANH based on some of the suggestions of MTHaslett from a previous post. It's a rough and preliminary version of a portion of that scene, but it seems to have turned out pretty good. I made it mostly to gauge the potential of my equipment. Let me know what you think, and how it can be made better.

As I've explained before, I've had a few hang-ups while exporting it, so if you notice any jumpiness, or other technical problems while watching it, please let me know.

The only down side is that it's around 56mb, so my apologies to those of you on dial-up. If anyone has any suggestions on how to compress it to a smaller size without losing a massive amount of image quality, then please be kind enough to give me the info.

In closing, I'm tired of bitching about this crap on message boards, it's time to take some action and make it happen.

--InfoDroid

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Originally posted by: MTHaslett
Thanks for the kind words. I think when you go through this thread, you'll see how often I've been shaken off bad ideas and shown better ones, so I feel confident I'll be more than satisfied with Trooperman's work

It sounds like Trooperman is doing a great job with AOTC, I was only referring to TPM. But it looks like that might be happening now.

I'm in agreement with TM on the OT, though. No changes needed there (well, maybe RotJ).
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InfoDroid--

Wow. That is awesome!

The feeling of having Ben go ahead and be honest brings a long forgotten sense of honor to that scene. He's not going to lie!! Obi Wan does not lie!!

Contributing to that feels good-- I want this version of ANH to complete my saga!

BUT

I don't believe this is part of the "Shroud of the Darkside" project anymore -- before giving comments I think we need an "InfoDroid's "A New Hope"" thread.

Then we should probably have a "Ranch-Style Episode I" thread too if we really want to hammer that one out.

But Jeebus help me, that little clip puts the whole Saga together in a new and better way for me. Now Luke's determination to bring his father back from the Dark Side doesn't happen so rapidly. One of my big problems with ROTJ is how Vader is such a bad-ass throughout ESB, but Luke still "senses the good in him" and gives birth to all kinds of sad and bitter-sweet close-ups of Vader through most of ROTJ. The bad-ass Vader is basically absent -- fallen into the void between ESB and ROTJ. But if Luke always knew who Vader was, this transition has a lot more time to work itself out. Thanks InfoDroid!

But enough-- this is SHROUD OF THE DARKSIDE territory!

Long Live Trooperman!

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I'm not in a position to check that out now, InfoDroid, but I look forward to checking it out later tonight. And that's an interesting point on Luke's attitude towards Vader in RotJ, MTH; the transition there had never occured to me.

InfoDroid mentioned the opening crawl. Rebel11_38 made the crawl for SotDS, and I'm sure he'd be willing to contribute again to our future endevours. That brings me to my next point: Since we've gradually been developing into a true team collaboration here at "the Ranch", maybe we should come up with a name? You know, something for the DVD covers and end credits. Just a thought.

As for new threads, they have become a necessity as we've certainly cluttered this one up enough. I would start them myself, but MTH is the main proponent of the Episode I edit, and InfoDroid is already at work on the OT. Therefore I suggest they be the ones to start those respective threads (the OT only requires one, really).
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Originally posted by: Commander Courage
That brings me to my next point: Since we've gradually been developing into a true team collaboration here at "the Ranch", maybe we should come up with a name? You know, something for the DVD covers and end credits. Just a thought.

I was thinking the exact same thing, but I didn't want to sound too presumptuous until I knew everyone was onboard.

As for new threads, they have become a necessity as we've certainly cluttered this one up enough. I would start them myself, but MTH is the main proponent of the Episode I edit, and InfoDroid is already at work on the OT. Therefore I suggest they be the ones to start those respective threads (the OT only requires one, really).


Yeah, sorry about hijacking your thread, Trooperman. I didn't intend for that to happen. It was really more of an organic phenomenon.

Long live "The Ranch". And long live SOTDS!

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Getting this thread back on track:

Originally posted by: Trooperman
Would anyone like to have a stab at writing the second Lama-Su scene right now? It looks as though Nanner Split is ready to record soon. Here are my plans

-Boba Fett is Jango's natural son.
-The scene starts with Lama-Su saying, "Moral implications? I should have expected something like that from a Jedi." (laughs). "Oh...we don't concern ourselves with that here, Kenobi." Obi-Wan: I see.
-Lama-Su rambles on about the growth acceleration and all the other delightful details of the cloning operation (like the guy in "Brave New World") while Obi-Wan is mostly silent. “Lama-Su: Otherwise, a mature clone would take a lifetime to grow. Obi-Wan: Really.” (unimpressed and a little sarcastic. Lama-Su ignores him.) “Now we can do it in half the time.” Obi-Wan is silent.

These are pretty much the only restrictions. Remember, Obi-Wan is for the most part silent and not happy about the clones, and Lama-Su is rambling like the guy in Brave New World. He can say whatever we want, being redubbed.

I haven’t seen “The Island,” but it being about cloning perhaps Ewan has some dialogue that would be applicable in this scene?
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Quick question for trooperman: Is there going to be a music theme for Jango Fett? I always thought that his presence demanded it's own musical cue, considering he has soo much action and screen time. AOTC only offers chopped up "action" music. Just curious.

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Originally posted by: darthpreston
Quick question for trooperman: Is there going to be a music theme for Jango Fett? I always thought that his presence demanded it's own musical cue, considering he has soo much action and screen time. AOTC only offers chopped up "action" music. Just curious.


I still think it would be cool to try that little bassoon motif from ESB.

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Hi, everyone- I'm sorry for my negligence in keeping you updated-just trying to get things moving on my end.

I haven’t seen “The Island,” but it being about cloning perhaps Ewan has some dialogue that would be applicable in this scene?

Huh- I haven't seen it either, but maybe I need to check it out.

Quick question for trooperman: Is there going to be a music theme for Jango Fett? I always thought that his presence demanded it's own musical cue, considering he has soo much action and screen time. AOTC only offers chopped up "action" music. Just curious.

I'm going to incorporate the bassoon motif into the talk between Obi-Wan and Jango, as InfoDroid suggested. As for the fist fight on Kamino, we could do something like this...Jango/Obi-Wan short clip

Now, before you all ask, that IS the same "Here They Come" cue from Star Wars. I think it's acceptable, however, because...

1. It was used in Return of the Jedi. Using it in SOTDS would make the cue show up in 2, 4, and 6.
2. I'm using a different performance of the piece
3. I've changed the key


And I’m sorry, MTH- I WILL use your terrific suggestions you posted a while back. Over Christmas and New Years, I am making a complete guide to myself based on my notes and this thread, and things will start becoming a lot clearer. Also, DarthPreston, I will be releasing a trailer- just not yet, because a lot of the things I would want to show to the public (Anakin’s voice, Lama-Su’s voice, Mace’s blue saber, etc.) have not been done yet, and I’d like them to be.


---------------
But now for a BIG change I'm considering....

A long time ago, someone suggested replacing the love theme. I talked them out of it at the time. Now, I'm rethinking this, after discovering that the theme from “Laura” is available as a Gerdhart rerecording in a 20 minute+ suite, incorporating numerous arrangements and variations of the theme. I tested this idea for the love theme in the arena, taking the audio from the opening credits of the movie itself (accounting for the awful audio in this clip). Obviously, this is very rough, only a test, and so on.

Arenarough

What do you think? I was just contemplating why so much of my movie is still sounding like “Attack of the Clones” and not a old classic, and the more I thought about, the more I realized that it’s this love theme that’s still giving me the feeling from “Attack of the Clones, and bringing me memories of scenes and bad dialogue that I don’t want to remember.

And I explained that about as clearly as mud Talk to you soon,

-TM

EDIT: And by the way, don't apologize for "hijacking" my thread. I loved all the discussion- it just wasn't related to Episode II and it needed a new thread, which it has. Again, I'm thrilled that things are starting to take off at this level.

Episode II: Shroud of the Dark Side

Emperor Jar-Jar
“Back when we made Star Wars, we just couldn’t make Palpatine as evil as we intended. Now, thanks to the miracles of technology, it is finally possible. Finally, I’ve created the movies that I originally imagined.” -George Lucas on the 2007 Extra Extra Special HD-DVD Edition

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I love the Jango vs Obi-Wan change and I think it'll work well.

The Arena clip, on the other hand, just didn't feel right. Wasn't the right tone for what they were facing. And the recording sounded real tinny.

BUT, the good news is, I've always loved that theme from "Laura" and I have a version that was conducted and arranged by John Williams. I'll send it to you, you'll love it.


EDIT: You've got e-mail.

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I generally don't post in here, but the arena clip has forced my hand/fingers . That "Laura" theme doesn't go well at all with the tone of the scene. It made me feel I was watching some old Cary Grant movie. Lovey Dovey/kind of goofy music doesn't fit there. It's your edit and so you can do what you want obviously, but I would really encourage you to either leave the original music or try something that has more serious tone to it.

Rock on.
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Trooperman --

I fear you may have tipped your hand too soon on this clip -- what is a great idea may get shouted down by the temp execution. I, for one, love the way the music sets the scene. I think there is a phrase or two that gets too upbeat, but I never realized before how much Laura sounds like a Star Wars piece.

A problem for me is that I know Laura so well that it takes a moment to get used to. You are a music wiz-- I bet you intend to create a piece for this scene that doesn't quite use the full Laura theme? Anyway, that might be a suggestion.

But I believe the romance beat here should be the dominant feeling. The threat of death, the thousands of blood thirsty spectators, the hopelessness of the situation all mean less than "she loves me! We're in love!" The many emotions of this scene should combine to create its complete and bitter-sweet tone -- but romance should and will come first if you have a strong musical theme like this.

It's quite like the Princess Leia confession just as Han is being carbonited. That's a scary scene, but it was the romance of it that most characterised it-- that was its dominant quality. All the good-guy/bad-guy story issues came second.

The music, even as temp as it is in your clip, really makes the arena come to life for me. The spectators and the march to the columns both feel more real-- because our point of view is anchored by the music; we feel it through these lovers. That was missing before.

Good work!

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I know that we're going for a totally new feel for the prequels, but I say if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Across the Stars in an incredible piece and one of the only themes in Episode II worth remembering/and thus keeping. Not to say your alternate suggestion is a bad idea, I'm sure with the appropriate sound quality it would fit nicely, but I see absolutely no reason to change the love theme.

Your clip also brought the subject of subtitles to my attention. You mentioned in the Ranch thread that you and InfoDroid needed to coordinate them, absolutely. May I suggest you use the same methods MagnoliaFan used in "Balance of the Force," where the new subtitles were indistinguishable from the originals. ADigitalMan's subtitles were much to large for my taste; they should never overlap on the picture when in widescreen format. That's on of the advantages to having those "annoying black bars" at the top and bottom.
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It's official, Commander Courage. You never agree with ANYTHING!!! I for one love the idea of a new love theme. Across the Stars was just a rehash of his Nixon soundtrack. And you're right, Trooperman, it reminds us too much of that horrible film called Attack of the Clones.

Regarding subtitles: Should we be working toward "burned" subtitles, like the ones burned into the picture in the original Greedo scene, or are we going to be using the ones that appear in the bottom black portion of the letterbox bars?

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If you are looking for a cool Sam Jackson quote, SpikeTV is running a commercial for their video game award show thing where he says, "The battle can be won, but in a civilized, high class affair". The show is this week, so if you want it, you had better tivo it soon.
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Originally posted by: InfoDroid
It's official, Commander Courage. You never agree with ANYTHING!!! I for one love the idea of a new love theme. Across the Stars was just a rehash of his Nixon soundtrack. And you're right, Trooperman, it reminds us too much of that horrible film called Attack of the Clones.

Regarding subtitles: Should we be working toward "burned" subtitles, like the ones burned into the picture in the original Greedo scene, or are we going to be using the ones that appear in the bottom black portion of the letterbox bars?

Well someone has to be a voice of reason in this group of "free thinkers." If you guys want to go the the trouble of totally replacing the perfectly acceptable love theme of Episodes II and III, that's just more work for you. I'll stand by Across the Stars.

Subtitles: bottom black portion of the widescreen bars, definitely. Just like in the official DVDs.
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Citizen hasn't gotten back to me about the Blade Runner footage. I guess he's busy....

I see that we have some mixed feelings about a new love theme.

It made me feel I was watching some old Cary Grant movie

That's very understandable; as I said, I swiped that awful quality recording from "Laura", a movie from that era.

InfoDroid- thanks so much for that recording! I love it- very romantic. That would make a good cue for the balcony scene. By the way, that other email you sent me didn't contain an attachment (just to let you know).

But I believe the romance beat here should be the dominant feeling.

And that's what I was trying to get at, seeing as this is the first time they've kissed. It's almost a climax of the movie. So the following shots I don't think should be scored with scary music- I think they should be scored with the love theme, whatever it happens to be.

You are a music wiz-- I bet you intend to create a piece for this scene that doesn't quite use the full Laura theme?

Ha ha- not quite. I don't have the $$ to do that with orchestra for a personal project. The alternative would be MIDI, which I hate.

If you guys want to go the the trouble of totally replacing the perfectly acceptable love theme of Episodes II and III, that's just more work for you.

Well...not really, because the love theme only comes in on the scenes that I'm redoing the sound mix on anyway (dubbing Anakin). So it'd actually be a very easy switch. So easy, in fact, that two versions may be possible. (Oh, no- I'm falling into the Lucas trap! Next thing you know, I'll have a six track mix, a stereo mix, and a mono mix, all different...)

Regarding subtitles: The subtitles in the original SW trilogy were burned in to the picture frame. They did not fade in and out. This was changed for the Def. Coll. and the Faces release. Now, the original prequels had subtitles in the frame that faded in and out. I liked this a lot. So I was leaning more towards burned in subtitles that fade in and out (in a different font from the clip I posted- that was a random font). But if there's a compelling reason not to, I'm open.

"The battle can be won..." - That's a great quote! Unfortunately, I'm not paying for cable right now and I can't tape it, which is a shame.

"You never agree with ANYTHING!!!"

Ha ha- you know what, though? I like CC. I like all of you guys. Our different personalities and the checks and balances we have here make for excellent collaboration. I'm so happy I'm here. Oh, and it just occured to me...the comment was made, "Wouldn't it be nice if Episodes I and II were released at the same time?" Yeah, that scenario would it nice More time to work is good....

Episode II: Shroud of the Dark Side

Emperor Jar-Jar
“Back when we made Star Wars, we just couldn’t make Palpatine as evil as we intended. Now, thanks to the miracles of technology, it is finally possible. Finally, I’ve created the movies that I originally imagined.” -George Lucas on the 2007 Extra Extra Special HD-DVD Edition

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Originally posted by: Trooperman
InfoDroid- thanks so much for that recording! I love it- very romantic. That would make a good cue for the balcony scene. By the way, that other email you sent me didn't contain an attachment (just to let you know).

Oops, sorry. I'll resend it right away.

Regarding subtitles: The subtitles in the original SW trilogy were burned in to the picture frame. They did not fade in and out. This was changed for the Def. Coll. and the Faces release. Now, the original prequels had subtitles in the frame that faded in and out. I liked this a lot. So I was leaning more towards burned in subtitles that fade in and out (in a different font from the clip I posted- that was a random font). But if there's a compelling reason not to, I'm open.

All right. You'll need to give me an example so I can duplicate it. I did some research and found the original subtitles are in a font called "ITC Franklin Gothic Demi Bold" with -30 tracking.

Ha ha- you know what, though? I like CC. I like all of you guys. Our different personalities and the checks and balances we have here make for excellent collaboration. I'm so happy I'm here.


And we're happy you're here as well. I think it's so great how this whole thing with the four of us has sort of organically grown out of your thread. But, don't try to defend Commander Courage. He knows where he stands with me.

Oh, and it just occured to me...the comment was made, "Wouldn't it be nice if Episodes I and II were released at the same time?" Yeah, that scenario would it nice More time to work is good....


Nope. Don't try to buy yourself more time either. My goal is to catch up with you for the May release. Hahaha! Just kidding. You've got all the time you want. But I would like to see this thing before I start collecting my social security.

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Okay, Trooperman--

Here are my ideas, as promised, for re-cutting the Cliegg Lars breakfast table scene. As it stands, it's a weirdly edited scene that features Cliegg trying to drum up excitement over his story. The scene should have played out over the reactions on Anakin and Padme's faces. That's what I want to create. Here goes--

INT. TATOOINE, HOMESTEAD, KITCHEN - LATE DAY
BERU puts several steaming cups of ardees on a tray and exits the kitchen... (Trooperman: ADD cool kitchen sounds like in ANH)

CLIEGG (O.S.)
It was just before dawn. They
came out of nowhere. A hunting
party of Tuskin Raiders.

We follow Beru upstairs...

INT. TATOOINE, HOMESTEAD, DINING AREA - LATE DAY
CLIEGG, OWEN, PADME and ANAKIN sit around the table, BERU brings the drinks from the kitchen.

(TROOPERMAN: Try cropping the Full Screen shot of this -- make more interesting composition, like the time Luke had a meal here. Try to lose Padme taking off her coat-- what's up with that?)

Re-synching/Changing dialogue without cutting: (Match Cliegg saying "halfway" with lip-flap as his mouth forms the word "evaporator." Move the preceding dialogue up until the whole thing plays. Remember there can be nice... long... pauses... it is an emotional scene.)

CLIEGG
From the tracks, she
was about halfway when--

CUT TO: c.u. of Anakin.

CLIEGG (O.S.)
--they took her. Those Tuskens walk like
men, but they're vicious --

CUT TO: c.u. of Padme.

CLIEGG (O.S.)
--mindless monsters.

CUT TO: c.u. of Cliegg.

CLIEGG
Thirty of us went after her.
Four of us came back.

CUT TO: c.u. of Anakin.

CLIEGG (O.S.)
--I don't want to give up on her, but
she's been gone a month.

CUT TO: c.u. of Padme.

CLIEGG (O.S.)
--There's little hope she's lasted this--

CUT TO: c.u. of Cliegg (use image of him saying the word "heal..."; trails off, looking sad and broken)

CLIEGG
--long.

CUT TO: med. 3- Shot. Anakin stands as Owen and Cliegg look on.

OWEN
Where are you going?

ANAKIN
To find my mother.

CUT TO: c.u. of Padme (the one they used after all dialogue is over. Time the shot so her eyes turn down when she hears the line "accept it.")

CLIEGG (O.S.)
Your mother's dead, son. Accept it.

CUT TO:

EXT. TATOOINE, HOMESTEAD, MOISTURE FARM - LATE DAY
ANAKIN stands looking across the desert. PADME comes running out of the homestead after him. ANAKIN turns to PADME.

(speed this fu*ker up-- we see that hut for a good 2 seconds before she comes out the door, why?

--Start the "Binary Sunset" cue (or whatever it's called) early, like here... Let it play out more completely before cutting to the next location)

Anakin and Padme hug-- we see only their shadows. No dialogue except...

PADME
Anakin...

ANAKIN walks over to Owen's speeder bike, which is standing close by.

ANAKIN takes off across the desert. PADME watches him go.


***

This version keys us more into Anakin's head and Padme's concern for him. She's there with him every step of the way. When he decides he has to go, she's right there with him and nothing needs to be said. She hugs him and says his name to show her support ...and he goes. Much more romantic to my way of seeing it.

Thoughts?

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I think that is a flawless edit of that scene , IMO. Good job Mathaslett.