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Episode 3 - Editing Back in Progress (* unfinished project *) — Page 13

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Well, my crawl almost fits the genuine Episode 3 crawl. It loses "traction", so to speak, as it gets closer to the vantage point. You can make out the yellow color of the original crawl's text peaking out at the top above my red text.

I'm hoping that the adjustment is as simple as elbow-greasing the angle into the correct place, but it could get pretty ugly to work with if I end up needing to resize and justify all of my text elements (episode #, title and text body).

http://img178.imageshack.us/img178/3928/crawlbodyreplica02ph2.png

Stay tuned.
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Originally posted by: darkhelmet
Well, it's slow-going with life and other projects in the mix, but a friend and I sat down with an Episode 3 script and went to work; he's got a head for story details and is great at continuity!

We cut out a bunch of stuff (Grievous will be gone as Kerr had said he was doing with his edit) and added some scenes back in (making Padme a stronger character).

Seeing that the story would actually work without Grievous (it was like getting a look at what Lucas had written before the addition of Grievous the story flows so well!), I got excited to begin my final anamorphic widescreen edit, and wrote a new title crawl with my friend's input.



I'm really interested to know how you've made this work, in particular - Obi-Wan, where does he go? I ask mainly because I'm working on my own mamoth edit of the PT and I'm seriously considering either doing away with Grevious or completley re dubbing him (new script as well) possibly adding in the suggested Maul connection.

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I was just listening to GM's Episode III soundtrack, and I noticed a small portion of (what I think to be) unused music, music that I really like. I guess it was cut because the scene was slightly reworked or something. It's just the small action-ish bit at the beginning of Enter Lord Vader (track 07 on disc 2). I just love it, and think it would be neat to re-incorporate it in your edit, not sure where it would fit though.
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Originally posted by: Mabrothrax

I'm really interested to know how you've made this work, in particular - Obi-Wan, where does he go?
Well, we haven't made it work yet. It seems possible we can cut references to Grievous and still have Obi-wan leave on some undescribed campaign.

I like the possibility of what this might do to the overall story, focusing it more on Anakin's frustrations and relationship with Padme.

I would probably need to keep some of the battle on Utapau but would only follow through with Obi-wan to show where has gone and how he reconnects with Anakin later.

I ask mainly because I'm working on my own mamoth edit of the PT and I'm seriously considering either doing away with Grevious or completley re dubbing him (new script as well) possibly adding in the suggested Maul connection.

Are you making one movie out of the three?

If so, there's a good edit you should check out if you haven't yet for how they can all be cut together, STAR WARS - Fall Of The Republic by Blankfist. Has some major aesthetic problems in the Episode I portion, but the concepts are cool.

BTW, there was a suggested Maul connection? Do tell...

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Originally posted by: Owen-Lars-Kenobi

I was just listening to GM's Episode III soundtrack, and I noticed a small portion of (what I think to be) unused music, music that I really like... It's just the small action-ish bit at the beginning of Enter Lord Vader (track 07 on disc 2)... and... it would be neat to re-incorporate it in your edit, not sure where it would fit though.

Thanks for the suggestion, OLK! I've made a note to listen to that. I've now listened to GM's collected score, and it's awesome! Seems like it'll be a great resource in rebuilding the movie's soundtrack in my edit.

Your comments on my blasphemous ideas on replacing Williams' music with that of others motivated me to go back to the Original Trilogy to listen to more obscure tracks for possible use in my edit.

I never gave Williams' Star Wars music a deep listen before, I guess, but he's got some great stuff.

However (prepare for more blasphemy), I figured out what I most dislike about the Prequel music: the choral vocals.

The cheezy execution of the films just didn't seem to justify such an opulent sound especially as often as it came to be used, when I think it was never used in the GOUT until Jedi, and then, only for the Emperor as far as I remember.

Just an update on the title crawl:

http://img161.imageshack.us/img161/1232/titlecrawllenswarpvc2.png

I'm trying to get some tips in the technical discussion forum for things like the apparent lens warp/bulge which bows the text outward in the rough perspective-corrected text I did as you can see above, especially at the bottom of it.

Hopefully, someone can give me some info to save me a little trial-and-error and get me moving on to more of the editing.
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Originally posted by: darkhelmet
Originally posted by: Mabrothrax

I'm really interested to know how you've made this work, in particular - Obi-Wan, where does he go?
Well, we haven't made it work yet. It seems possible we can cut references to Grievous and still have Obi-wan leave on some undescribed campaign.

I like the possibility of what this might do to the overall story, focusing it more on Anakin's frustrations and relationship with Padme.

I would probably need to keep some of the battle on Utapau but would only follow through with Obi-wan to show where has gone and how he reconnects with Anakin later.

I ask mainly because I'm working on my own mamoth edit of the PT and I'm seriously considering either doing away with Grevious or completley re dubbing him (new script as well) possibly adding in the suggested Maul connection.

Are you making one movie out of the three?

If so, there's a good edit you should check out if you haven't yet for how they can all be cut together, STAR WARS - Fall Of The Republic by Blankfist. Has some major aesthetic problems in the Episode I portion, but the concepts are cool.

BTW, there was a suggested Maul connection? Do tell...


The Darth Maul connection, I've seen it mentioned on this forum and others (can't remember exactly where though) the idea beign that Grevious is the cybernetic recreation of Darth Maul, mostly as the eyes are similar and perhaps the lightsaber usage.

I have seen Fall of the Republic and yes I am attempting something similar, TPM is down to an hour at present and it works well. II & III are problems for me - in AOTC Anakin is almost gone and the same goes for Obi-Wan in ROTS. If I can work the story to a satisfactory level I'll start a thread.

Anyway, the crawl looks good so far but I've not attempted anything similar so can't really add any technical help!

Regarding your story & Obi-Wan, perhaps he merely goes after 'the separatist leader(s)', surely the phrase is spoken enouhg (in AOTC as well) for a few re-dubs?
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The Maul/Grevious connection was mentioned in the Starkiller Ranch thread. A replacement of the choral music would be interesting. It was awesome backing Palpatine up in Jedi and cool in Dual of the Fates, but it seemed overdone by the time Episode 3 rolled around. I think I'd keep the Immolation Scene music and the choral music behind the water opera, but the rest could go.
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Originally posted by: Mabrothrax
The Darth Maul connection, I've seen it mentioned on this forum and others (can't remember exactly where though) the idea beign that Grevious is the cybernetic recreation of Darth Maul, mostly as the eyes are similar and perhaps the lightsaber usage.
Funny! After I posted to you about this, I found a piece of concept art of Maul as half cyborg (the legs) in a Star Wars comic book over the weekend at the book store!
I have seen Fall of the Republic and yes I am attempting something similar, TPM is down to an hour at present and it works well. II & III are problems for me - in AOTC Anakin is almost gone and the same goes for Obi-Wan in ROTS. If I can work the story to a satisfactory level I'll start a thread.
Anakin is almost GONE in AOTC? You're removing him mostly from the whole movie? If so, very intriguing. What's your plan for him as a character through your edit if I may be so bold to ask?
Anyway, the crawl looks good so far but I've not attempted anything similar so can't really add any technical help!

No problem. Suffering in After Effects; seems to be my lot in life.
Regarding your story & Obi-Wan, perhaps he merely goes after 'the separatist leader(s)', surely the phrase is spoken enouhg (in AOTC as well) for a few re-dubs?

I like the way you're thinking! Can you point out any particular lines from either movie to help me narrow it down should I need the re-dub? Thanks big!

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Sluggo: thanks for the forum knowledge on the Maul-cyborg issue. Man, those guys over in the Ranch thread! Gotta respect the creativity going on over there.

I'm glad you like the possibility of cutting out most of the choral music. It really was overdone by Epsiode 3. I might want to replace the opera scene music, though. But I think all the music talk in the thread here just means that I'm going to need to do 2 mixes!! We'll see how I feel after I complete my edit with the official Episode 3 music intact first.

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I hear talk about music! lol

On starwars.com, the mashups have clean audio (mono) for a lot of the scenes you are speaking about.

When I say clean, I mean devoid of music. Replace and resync the audio to your edit, add in the new music and presto... lol


Is it not sad that in this time, we are more surprised by acts of love than acts of hate?
-Me

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The crawl looks pretty good, the speed seems about right, but what about the colour of the text?
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Darkhelmet,

The crawl is coming along very nicely.

You have a PM!

You know of the rebellion against the Empire?

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GM: I know so many others have found your compilation to be an awesome collection of Episode III music, and I'd like to add my thanks for bringing that to the forums! It's going to be a great resource for patching up the score for my edit.

Do you have a link to the mash-ups you are speaking of? I did a search on starwars.com for "mashups" and "mash-ups" and saw some funny stuff bu nothing much useful for editing. Sounds like that material would be great stuff to have.

Mabrothrax: yeah, the text color is just for my editing purposes as I try to match the text sizes and crawl speed. I plan on changing it to match the other Star Wars movies once the title works correctly.

Erikstormtrooper: thanks for the feedback!
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Originally posted by: darkhelmetDo you have a link to the mash-ups you are speaking of? I did a search on starwars.com for "mashups" and "mash-ups" and saw some funny stuff bu nothing much useful for editing. Sounds like that material would be great stuff to have.


here's the mash-ups page. has some great clips here. You do have to be registered at starwars.com to access it though because you have to sign in first.
Star Wars Mash-ups

ANH:REVISITED
ESB:REVISITED

DONATIONS TOWARDS MATERIALS FOR THE REVISITED SAGA

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Awesome, Ady! Thanks for the link. I just need to say that the stuff you're doing over in your thread is mind-blowing.

Here's a rough-cut of the opening titles for my edit which incorporates the 1970's 20th Century logo animation and a recreated text-only "Lucasfilm Limited" title.
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Just wanted to post an update. I'm working in earnest on a rough-cut of the entire movie from my anamorphic and 5.1 surround sources. I've reincorporated deleted scenes #2 and #5 and have edited through the end of Padme's veranda scene where Anakin shares with her his thoughts about the state of the Jedi and the Republic.

I don't want to share any video prematurely, but I will continue to post updates until the rough-cut is complete. I'm not really sweating the polishing details right now, but I am focusing on the story flow and the strength of the character performances. Ironically enough, it seems we here on OT.com and fanedit.org are engaging in what Lucas likes the most in his filmmaking process: rewriting the film in post-production!
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Update : I have reincorporated deleted scene #4 so that all of Padme's scenes dealing with preserving democracy despite the Chancellor are now a part of the movie and make her character stronger while making the rift between she and Anakin hopefully more believable.

I am currently editing the scene where the Jedi confront Palpatine and Anakin decides to become Sidious' apprentice.

Thanks to Erikstormtrooper and TheTome for their critiques of the movie's opening crawl, the substance of which has been a continual source of story complication. Special thanks to Erikstormtrooper for taking the time to lend his writing expertise to the rewriting of the crawl!
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Update : I've edited through Anakin's turn to the Dark Side, and I like where the edit is heading. This is only the rough edit for story, flow, and dialogue purposes and does not reflect the final quality I am aiming for, much like the process of editing for a real motion picture.

For Anakin's turn, I may go back to re-edit the basics of the sequence, but the dialogue and character performances are much improved!

The scene can be downloaded here. Enjoy!
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hi DH, good work..have you an idea of how to do the palpy/sidious metamorphosis and is it intentional when you've flipped the last sequences ?
Grooaoohumpf
(scuze my english)
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Darkhelmet,

EXCELLENT storytelling and flow! I really like your style of editing and your ideas. I have 3 small suggestions.
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1) Cut :38 - :43. This segment contains 4 short shots of Anakin, but the cuts are quick and ubrubt. Cut the two middle shots, as pretty as they are, and the bookends complete the intention of the shot. This also would then mirror the Padme shots prior like this.

Padma: Long Shot, Close up - Anakin: Long shot, Close Up


2) Cut 1:35 - 1:38. This is the third City Shot. The connection has already been established, and this inturrupts the exit from this emotional scene. With out this shot, it plays out like this, starting with the above sequence.

Part 1 Establishs the deep thought> Padme: Long Shot, Close up - Anakin: Long shot, Close Up

Part 2 Establishes the Communication across the city> Padme: Long Shot, Close up, City Shot - Anakin: Long shot, Behind shot (emphasis on Anakin's turmoil), Close Up, City Shot

Part 3 Now Communicating, Establishes the Emotion> Padme: Close Up (Showing Fear) - Anakin: Close Up (Showing Pain)

Part 4 The Exit> Padme: Lowers Head - Anakin: Turns to Leave Decision Made.

I hope that makes sense, I would have re-edited it, but I wouldn't have the time until tomorrow.

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3) When Anakin attacks Mace, he says: "You can't", then just chops off Maces Arm. I think it's important to add the line "I need Him!" It just connects the dots for the average viewer.

I can't wait to see the rest of your edit!
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Hi darkhelmet!

Just watched your newest clip, and it looks great, but I do have a few suggestions.

1) The silence used to remove Palpatine's line about Grievous is a bit awkward. I guess it's just a temporary solution, but I thought I'd point it out all the same.

2) Like jedi_jra already said, you should keep the "I need him!" line, which I think should be easy enough to do

3) Intercutting shots of "emperor" Palpatine with "normal" Palpatine... It's a great idea, but not very "Starwarsy". I suggest just having him change into the emperor without any further explanation, but it's a tricky problem.

4) I think the line "what have I done" should be kept in, although I know many people will disagree. It makes the turn just a bit more gradual, in my opinion, but I understand why some people dislike it.

And now for something completely different... Your title "The Dark Times" is a bit too vague for my tastes (so are "A New Hope" and "The Phantom Menace", come to think of it). My personal favorite Ep. III title is "Fall of the Republic", but in the end it's all up to you, of course. (By the way, in case you were wondering, my Ep. III edit is not quite dead. It's more alive than my current computer, anyway. So once I save enough money for a proper computer, it's back to editing.)

On the whole, your edit looks really great, and I'm really looking forward to seeing the finished product. Will it be 5.1?
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Good to hear from you guys! I'm glad the edit is receiving mostly positive feedback, and thanks for the constructive critiques. Realistically, it will be a while before it's finished as I will need to grapple with the details of audio editing to patch up the rough spots and of effects editing like rotoscoping.

cbaka : I do have a couple of ideas for how to do the Palp/Sidious metamorphosis, but the surprise (if either idea works) will need to wait. The scene flip was intentional, and I like the emotional quality it seems to impart, a visual change that underscores the character change in Anakin. However, I'm not sure I will keep it as the set doesn't allow for such an expansion of the room in reality; it may work, however, since the original scene never really gives a sense of the room's full scope. Also, so much of the film seems to be shot from the right of the characters, and I didn't notice how much this bothered me until I had the idea for the flip; it made the movie suddenly seem more cinematic.

jedi_jra : It's great to hear that you really enjoyed the scene edit; that's extra fuel for the tank on this long journey! Thanks for your edit suggestions for the Anakin/Padme scene. The funny thing is that the only thing I edited in that scene was cutting the final shot of Padme out since C3PO pointlessly entered the scene and bowed to her! This scene was really the only scene that I remember liking in the theater, because it was so character- and emotionally-centered. If I remove Palpatine's telepathic message to Anakin as has been suggested to me, I may need to cut the scene similarly to your suggestions, but hopefully the pace of it as is will be a nice part of the new movie flow. As for Anakin saying "You can't!", I sincerely hope that his need of Palpatine will be understood by this point in the movie and that I will not need to include the line as it makes me cringe. I'll need to wait and see if subtlety will work in this regard.

kerr : Sorry to hear that you are sans computer! I hope you can get a proper one soon. To your comments: 1) The silence will be fixed. 2) The line makes me cringe, so hopefully I won't need to use it; maybe the gradual build-up to this point with Anakin will make his need of Palpatine apparent. 3) Yeah, the intercutting was mostly a rough representation of the change, and I am planning to do more with it that will make it feel more "Starwarsy". 4) Hayden Christensen's acting makes me cringe at this line, too. I may need to put it back in, though, as the pacing of this part of the scene seems a bit off as is. 6) LOL! Ironically, I wanted a title that was more in line with "A New Hope", so the reason you dislike it is kind of a compliment that I hit the mark I was trying for! I do think that "The Phantom Menace" was a lame Star Wars title, though. And, finally, 7) the edit will be 5.1 (unless I can't figure out how to put it on DVD that way, but I don't think that will be much of an issue).

Onto more editing! I'll be continuing work on the rough cut of the entire film and then going back and finessing it. The rest of the movie has me a bit nervous becasue of all of the changes I hope to make. I'm going to keep my fingers crossed that it doesn't all end up falling apart!
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"As for Anakin saying "You can't!", I sincerely hope that his need of Palpatine will be understood by this point in the movie and that I will not need to include the line as it makes me cringe. I'll need to wait and see if subtlety will work in this regard."

I agree with the cringing part, most of his performance makes me cringe, I think you can leave the scene as is in your edit, just put his voice over the transition from the backside of Anakin to the shot with Mace with his lightsaber raised. Mace almost pauses and moves his head in disbelief as if Anakin is still speaking so it may work. ( I also realize it may not ) Maybe even simply replacing, "you can't" with "I need him". By itself, I don't think it will be as cringeworth, especially if we're not SEEING him say it. I just feel we need to see a little more emotion from Anakin before he lops of Mace's arm.


The Anakin and Padme scene, I didn't realize you had left it unchanged...It's been a while since I've seen it. I agree with you about the emotion part, I think it's one of the most impactful scenes in the movie, I just think it could be even better with a little tweaking.