logo Sign In

Collaborative Fanediting: An ROTJ Proposition (BACK ON TRACK WITH EMANSWFAN AT THE HELM--SEE POST 1488 OR OP FOR A LINK!) — Page 32

Author
Time

I look forward to your ideas/suggestions after giving it a gander :)

Author
Time

Ok, here's something I'd like an opinion about.  

Moments before the sail barge explodes, the Luke and the rest of the rebels are able to find some magnets on hoses on a skiff, manage to deploy them to pull the droids out of the sand, pull them up on deck and sail away as the barge explodes behind them.  

I'd really like to see this scene tightened up a bit.   Something more like this:

EXTERIOR: UPPER DECK - SAIL BARGE

 

Luke is warding off laser blasts with his lightsaber, surrounded by guards and fighting like a demon. Leia emerges onto the deck as Luke turns to face another guard.

 

LUKE: (to Leia) Get the gun! Point it at the deck!

 

Leia turns toward the barge cannon, climbs on the platform, and swivels the gun around.

 

LUKE: Point it at the deck!

 

A laser blast hits Luke's mechanical hand and he bends over in pain, but manages to swing his lightsaber upward and take out the last of the guards. He looks at the wounded hand, which reveals the mechanism. He flexes the hand; it still works.

 

Luke runs along the empty deck toward Leia and the barge gun, which she has brought around to point down at the deck.

 

LUKE: Come on!

 

Luke has hold on one of the rigging ropes from the mast. He gathers Leia in his other arm and kicks the trigger of the deck gun. The gun explodes into the deck as Luke and Leia swing out toward the skiff.

 

EXTERIOR: SKIFF

 

Han leans panting against the rail as Chewie helps Lando onto the deck. Luke and Leia land on the skiff with flair.

 

LUKE: Let's go! And don't forget the droids.

The skiff moves in towards the burning barge

EXTERIOR: UPPER DECK - SAIL BARGE

 

Near the rail of the upper deck, Artoo and Threepio steady themselves as Threepio gets ready to jump. Artoo beeps wildly.

 

THREEPIO: Artoo, where are we going? I couldn't possibly jump.

 

Artoo butts the golden droid over the edge and steps off himself; both falling off screen landing the skiff with an enormous thud.

 

EXTERIOR: SKIFF

 

LANDO: We're on our way.

 

The skiff races away as the Sail Barge is exploding in stages in the distance. Half of the huge craft is on fire.

 

 

Author
Time

This sounds more realistic.  We'd have to be cautious not to succumb to the major criticism of that very part, i.e. dumb humor pulling them out of the sand.  If not done correctly, their landing on the skiff could be as silly as Threepio's antics in the Geonosian factory.  But if done well, for instance, making the jump not appear to drastic and not making their fall too catastrophic, it could be a good solution to that part.

Author
Time

So we're a month and a day into this project, and it has proven popular thus far.  I thought I'd include this picture to illustrate Ronster's idea.

Author
Time

Might require a good bit of CGI, but this is a pretty cool idea. 
Gotta find a sensible place to include it.

It might also be better to shoot the scene from inside, looking out. Also saves CGI work. 

Author
Time
 (Edited)

So here is the second round of voting.  This was a quick look through and description, and it still took me a long time.  I didn't even bother organizing it that well like I did for the last one.  I did include many links to ideas to assist in understanding the logic behind the suggestion, and I even included ideas that the original proponent backed off on.  The only ideas I deliberately skimmed were the Bothan/Death Star plans scenes, considering most were voted down the first time, and I just want to see if it's worthwhile to continue exploring the idea.  Please look it over and let me know if I missed a suggestion you've already made (don't give me any new ones, please).  And voting won't start till tomorrow, giving folks a chance to let me know if I missed something.  If you vote early, you might miss something.

Final note: the PM box only handles so many characters.  Don't PM me.  I've created a new email address just for this edit.  Tomorrow when voting begins, I will provide the new email address.

With no further delay, the items for consideration:

Fishmanlee’s alternate music cues: (Please compare to the original cues)

The Iron Door: 

Bounty for a Wookiee (SE Version) NEWER: 


Sail Barge Assault Alternate NEWEST: 


Ben and Luke on Log NEW: 


Father and Son: 


The Lightsaber: 


Leia Breaks The News Alternate: 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLidns6SSMM&feature=related
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_K8HL0psC8&feature=channel_video_titlehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X8eCuzn5q5U&feature=relatedhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USlGlb_D9DM&feature=channel_video_titlehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dSIG6oSCmJY&feature=relatedhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ek2YLVnzgwQ&feature=channel_video_titlehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RoYbpEyY-Y8&feature=channel_video_title

Have Boba Fett take off before the sail barge scene and we don’t see him again

 

Ships to include in the Battle of Endor:

            More B-wings

            More Mon Calamari cruisers

            Alternate Mon Calamari designs

            Clearly larger Home One

            BTL-B Y-wings

            Victory-class Star Destroyers

            Recusant-class light destroyers

            Beat up Naboo N-1 fighter cameo

            Beat up Z-95 Headhunter cameo

            Beat up ARC-170 fighters

            Larger main communications Star Destroyer (mentioned in the novel as "one of the larger Destroyers--"the Empire's main communications ship."

            Other less- or non-canonical ships (be specific)

            And even more other less- or non canonical ships (be specific)

Alternate fighter markings (i.e. green painted X-wings)

TheoOdo’s alternate plot with Coruscant (I know Coruscant was already voted down in most cases, but this clear a plot had not yet been presented, and I feel it only fair to include it)

Have Madine die on the second destroyed Mon Cal cruiser instead of the first

Include a brief clip where the Rebel’s take out the main communications Star Destroyer as described by darth_ender

Include a brief clip where B-wings destroy a Star Destroyer as described by darth_ender

Have Hayden Christiansen as Anakin’s Force ghost

Have Sebastian Shaw as Anakin’s Force ghost

Include a Ric Olie cameo

If Ric does make a cameo, have him die

Have Ric Olie voiced by TV’s Frink (since Ric would be an old man at this point anyway)

Instead of a specific Bothan scene, I just want a straight up or down vote, and in the third round we can hammer out a specific vision of incorporating them; include any kind of Bothan scene or Death Star plans delivery?

Show the Rebels suffering more losses during the Battle of Endor

Show the Imperials fleeing after the loss of the Executor

Show the Imperial fleet protecting the Death Star, then being destroyed in its explosion

Vader cracks glass when talking to Luke on the Endor landing platform in anger

Death Star is like Centerpoint Station, capable of destroying distant stars

Death Star has a powerful circular beam that emanates from its equator

There are two Death Stars, the first truly non-functional, the second hidden and truly dangerous (Luke is aboard the second)

Boba Fett shoots Luke’s hand (editing his shooting at Luke on the other skiff with Luke being hit in the hand)

Extend the Dagobah opening greatly, as suggested by Johannus

Extend it slightly with only Yoda giving Luke a crystal for his lightsaber, but not the rest of suggested extension

Star Destroyer docks with Death Star

If Duel of the Fates is used, consider other Williams versions 1 and 2

Transition from Dagobah to Death Star to Tatooine something along the lines of this (note that the vote-winning Beggar’s Canyon flythrough would not fit this scheme)

Include Luke saying, “I have a promise to keep to an old friend,” referring to rescuing Han on Tatooine.

Use the Sentinel shuttle in place of the Lambda shuttle as the captured shuttle used by Han and Co.

MrInsaneA’s requested background improvements

http://img707.imageshack.us/img707/545/nazimonitor.jpg

http://public.sn2.livefilestore.com/y1pjeAzVKMdslAa9lqCMeQdYb8Mfwz9TBc8nh_UsL7K6crKsDZxssKaqIjxH0ZpYce5mkOyYrRcOqeOyhsEJSWHYQ/Eye%20droid%202.jpg

http://img16.imageshack.us/img16/5971/armeat.jpg

http://i620.photobucket.com/albums/tt285/nDuTwan/EndorRebeledit.jpg

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/doubleofive/ROTJ%20Wishlist/Vaderios/roughshit.jpg

 

MrInsaneA’s second round of backdrop requests

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/doubleofive/ROTJ%20Wishlist/Vaderios/oralfixations2.jpg

http://img183.imageshack.us/img183/5609/shieldpov.jpg

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/doubleofive/ROTJ%20Wishlist/Vaderios/dsflyby.jpg

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/doubleofive/ROTJ%20Wishlist/Vaderios/newarrival.jpg

http://public.sn2.livefilestore.com/y1pjZEJIyYfr09CFoXlRn1Zqlg-G5BB-1IPHvU-IX4VsQ03MkvMcidKMuaNb2XiebbqXMoEHjOOTpXG7DW2HKANvw/Dragon%20carving.jpg

http://public.sn2.livefilestore.com/y1p44xTtY_ywls95oYhdq-HRXyRsJfYexklSZtqDieQ5pkE-e2tCgklDDGUsCMFiEIEzSWMd8mEwFMW7LBL2Ab8Ug/Endor%20waterfall%20base.jpg

http://www.axia.ws/axia/images/posts/lukes_saber.jpg

http://public.sn2.livefilestore.com/y1pYApumaX1V7cmzwOgFoZWpA-mCMwJz7GSsjt61vJn8vOwEuRGjyJr1n1QqNrORTJSi-0BNW_4aS5KVNLpbiKBDQ/BOOM!.jpg

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/doubleofive/ROTJ%20Wishlist/Vaderios/expcon.jpg

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/doubleofive/ROTJ%20Wishlist/Vaderios/dssurface.jpg

http://img52.imageshack.us/img52/1561/towert.jpg

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/doubleofive/ROTJ%20Wishlist/Vaderios/life.jpg

http://public.sn2.livefilestore.com/y1pjLjnMhmuyg99s3qcb9NEJJsznrTiEN6x7OHkDfFB9hqiMiU00x5gcUQIL8HTx4qIO5NQKStR59Bpa

 

“The Street Singer” playing when the droids arrive in Jabba’s throne room

Bingowings’ suggestion on taking out the shield generator

Han and Lando bury the hatchet over Luke’s intercom as they depart from Tatooine (not sure how doable this is)

Vader’s arrival at the Death Star is more significant, with more fighter escort and a larger welcoming entourage

If we do include Bothans, they are like the established EU canon

If we do include Bothans, they are human

Alternate Lapti Nek vocals

Make the Death Star’s orbit around Endor significantly further to be more realistic and emphasize its size (not to mention sparing the lives of Ewoks during the fallout)

More intercom chatter during the starfighter dogfights

TIE cockpit (pilot or window) shots    

More capital ship skirmishes, including a capital ship assault on the Executor prior to the A-wings taking out the generator and bridge

A full Rebel detachment rescues Han

Include HUDs (heads up displays) in the Rebel cockpit shots

As Luke departs Dagobah, he tells R2, “That’s right R2, we’re going to Tatooine [not showing his mouth, planet name taken from ESB].  I have a promise to keep to an old friend.”

Piett deliberately rams the Death Star with the Executor

Vader personally announces the dissolution of the Empire before he dies

Vader personally announces the a ceasefire before he dies

Some other voice announces the defeat of the Empire during the celebration scenes

Working title: Last of the Jedi

Show TIE fighters actually being released from their hangar

Author
Time

While mentioning hangers there was my old idea of adding bombers to the ground battle taking off from a hanger on the other side of the hill :

Author
Time

Yeah, you're right, Ray, but I just picture some silly fall, "Oof," har har.  I want it to fit the triumphant mood of the moment.

Bingo, I really enjoyed that scenario when looking at the wishlist, but then it made me worry: if the situation is already so bleak, how on earth (or Endor) could the good guys hope to pull off a victory against such odds?

Author
Time

I had this crazy/awful idea that even if I were to put it up for a vote, I'd vote it down.  Nevertheless, I find it a fun thought and I can't resist sharing.  I guess the logic for Vader's initial arrival in a regular Star Destroyer was so that when the Emperor came later, he'd come in the Executor.  Since we're changing it so Vader arrives in the Executor, what is the Emperor going to come in?  Certainly not a puny regular Star Destroyer!  He comes in the Eclipse! (Note that I don't care about its canonical incompleteness at this point)

Why I think it's a fun idea: it's the Emperor's ship; it's a badder ship than the Executor; I honestly like the way it looks.

Why the idea just plain sucks: this is definitely overboard with new ship designs; the ship is ridiculously powerful, with a superlaser (stupid!); as if the Rebels' odds weren't bad enough; inserting this into our edit would be a storyline/technical nightmare.

I just had to say it.  If I were Catholic, I would now head to confession.

Author
Time

Well that's weird.  I just copied and pasted.  I'll have to fix it later.  I'm actually thinking of sending out a ballot in Excel.  It would make it easier to track the votes.  The xls file has the correct format.

Author
Time

darth_ender said:

So we're a month and a day into this project, and it has proven popular thus far.  I thought I'd include this picture to illustrate Ronster's idea.

This would be cool to see if it could be done convincingly.  My only concern is that it would mess up the timing already in the movie.  The rebels discover that it is a trap, they turn to avoid the shields, find themselves in front of the Imperial fleet and the fighters appear.  Adding this shot would be an interruption to the pacing.  

Unless we are okay with the audience knowing about the trap and have the storm of ties launch as the Falcon is coming out of hyperspace, making it past the DS shield (is that a concern?  How would an audience watching the edit be ok with the tie fighters leaving the DS, but the rebels would be stopped by the shield?) and flying from behind the fleet of Star Destroyers to then engage the rebels?

Author
Time

Bingowings said:

While mentioning hangers there was my old idea of adding bombers to the ground battle taking off from a hanger on the other side of the hill :

This would be cool.

Author
Time

Sluggo said:

darth_ender said:

So we're a month and a day into this project, and it has proven popular thus far.  I thought I'd include this picture to illustrate Ronster's idea.

This would be cool to see if it could be done convincingly.  My only concern is that it would mess up the timing already in the movie.  The rebels discover that it is a trap, they turn to avoid the shields, find themselves in front of the Imperial fleet and the fighters appear.  Adding this shot would be an interruption to the pacing.  

Unless we are okay with the audience knowing about the trap and have the storm of ties launch as the Falcon is coming out of hyperspace, making it past the DS shield (is that a concern?  How would an audience watching the edit be ok with the tie fighters leaving the DS, but the rebels would be stopped by the shield?) and flying from behind the fleet of Star Destroyers to then engage the rebels?

Yes, timing is the question.  I would think it would actually best fit where "the shield is down" and the Rebel fighters begin their approach towards the Death Star.  That's when the Imperials realize, "Oh, crap," and launch more TIEs.

Author
Time

Oh, I see.  It would be a second wave of fighters. 

darth_ender said:

Yeah, you're right, Ray, but I just picture some silly fall, "Oof," har har.  I want it to fit the triumphant mood of the moment.

I'm expecting more of a panicked "Holy carp, this thing is going to blow.  Get me off of this thing."  R2 would yell something more frightened and less cavalier.

Author
Time

So I guess it would be ideal to dub 3PO as well.  That certainly changes the mood.

Author
Time
 (Edited)

Sluggo said:

darth_ender said:

So we're a month and a day into this project, and it has proven popular thus far.  I thought I'd include this picture to illustrate Ronster's idea.

This would be cool to see if it could be done convincingly.  My only concern is that it would mess up the timing already in the movie.  The rebels discover that it is a trap, they turn to avoid the shields, find themselves in front of the Imperial fleet and the fighters appear.  Adding this shot would be an interruption to the pacing.  

Agreed. I've always wanted to see this in one of the films, but I believe this shot would work best during the DS assault in ANH when Vader grabs his wing-men and leaves for battle.

EDIT: the 'second wave' idea would probably work nicely as well!

Ray’s Lounge
Biggs in ANH edit idea
ROTJ opening edit idea

Author
Time

Sluggo said:

Oh, I see.  It would be a second wave of fighters. 

darth_ender said:

Yeah, you're right, Ray, but I just picture some silly fall, "Oof," har har.  I want it to fit the triumphant mood of the moment.

I'm expecting more of a panicked "Holy carp, this thing is going to blow.  Get me off of this thing."  R2 would yell something more frightened and less cavalier.

darth_ender said:

So I guess it would be ideal to dub 3PO as well.  That certainly changes the mood.

Yes... yes. Love it. Even with 3PO's current dialog it works much better than the origina... at least in my head. It's still a bit of silly, but that's ok by me. I think Lando's smile and "we're on our way!" following their crash would make it a funny moment as well as it would seem the characters on screen find it just as amusing as the audience.

Ray’s Lounge
Biggs in ANH edit idea
ROTJ opening edit idea

Author
Time
 (Edited)

Here is the voting ballot:

http://www.4shared.com/office/x2FcL1wj/Vote_2.html

Please download it and mark Yes, No, or Maybe.  you have comments, go ahead and include those, but please keep the voting simple (no 3/4 maybes ;).  Voting ends on Sunday.  Send it to this email address, specifically created for this project:
rotjfan@gmail.com
This is the list of voter invitees:

darth_ender

Bingowings

Jaitea

GoodMusician

Ronster

Angel

aalenfae

Johannus

emanswfan

Sluggo

timdiggerm

TV’s Frink

MrInsaneA

fishmanlee

ray_afraid

doubleofive

Vladius

Fettclone1

Kurgan 

DominicCobb

TheoOdo

perfectlovehere

XyZ

Captain Antilles

greenpenguino

ShepardCommander

Harmy

Ric Olie’s puppet master

 

Author
Time
 (Edited)

A few typos and a repeated item on the ballot, but can't bother to take it back now.  Oh well.  Hope it's a useful way of doing the vote.

So I've decided now is the time to release the url to the new forum.  It's simple, but I think it should meet the needs of the editing crew.

http://collab.forumcircle.com/portal.php

Still waiting on GoodMusician and Jaitea to register, and there's not much activity yet, but that's to be expected given busy schedules and not much to report yet.  Hopefully the editors can make some tentative timetables so we know generally when to expect updates and to keep each other motivated.

I'm thinking of adding a single forum where guests can comment.  However, I'm not sure how wise that is, because I hope people will keep most comments here.  Let me know what you guys think.  No one will be able to register without a passcode, but if desired, folks can at least say, "Good job."

And a final note: we REALLY could use someone willing to do a rough edit of the whole film for the editors to use as a framework.  As the edit progresses, altered and fixed scenes can replace the old versions (i.e. emanswfan's improved deleted sandstorm scene could replace the BD version).  This way we can also see how simple editing choices work, such as the altered Endor battle, the droids falling directly onto the skiff (assuming that passes the vote), the placing of Dagobah and Vader reaching out to Luke in the beginning, etc.  It wouldn't have to be perfect, particularly sound-wise.  I think it would simply be a means of visualizing many of the changes and pacing.

WHOEVER VOLUNTEERS TO MAKE THE ROUGH EDIT AUTOMATICALLY GETS ACCESS TO THE NEW FORUM, for what it's worth to you.  You'd get more input on the process and get earlier updates.  Please, we really could use an editor to spare the special effects team the work of doing extraneous stuff and allowing them to focus on the actual effects.

Author
Time

darth_ender said:

A few typos and a repeated item on the ballot, but can't bother to take it back now.  Oh well.  Hope it's a useful way of doing the vote.

So I've decided now is the time to release the url to the new forum.  It's simple, but I think it should meet the needs of the editing crew.

http://collab.forumcircle.com/portal.php

Still waiting on GoodMusician and Jaitea to register, and there's not much activity yet, but that's to be expected given busy schedules and not much to report yet.  Hopefully the editors can make some tentative timetables so we know generally when to expect updates and to keep each other motivated.

I'm thinking of adding a single forum where guests can comment.  However, I'm not sure how wise that is, because I hope people will keep most comments here.  Let me know what you guys think.  No one will be able to register without a passcode, but if desired, folks can at least say, "Good job."

And a final note: we REALLY could use someone willing to do a rough edit of the whole film for the editors to use as a framework.  As the edit progresses, altered and fixed scenes can replace the old versions (i.e. emanswfan's improved deleted sandstorm scene could replace the BD version).  This way we can also see how simple editing choices work, such as the altered Endor battle, the droids falling directly onto the skiff (assuming that passes the vote), the placing of Dagobah and Vader reaching out to Luke in the beginning, etc.  It wouldn't have to be perfect, particularly sound-wise.  I think it would simply be a means of visualizing many of the changes and pacing.

WHOEVER VOLUNTEERS TO MAKE THE ROUGH EDIT AUTOMATICALLY GETS ACCESS TO THE NEW FORUM, for what it's worth to you.  You'd get more input on the process and get earlier updates.  Please, we really could use an editor to spare the special effects team the work of doing extraneous stuff and allowing them to focus on the actual effects.

I will do it!

Author
Time

Good man, MrInsaneA!  I really appreciate it.  You should have a PM in your inbox shortly.  Let me know if I can help in any way.

Author
Time
 (Edited)

darth_ender said:

Good man, MrInsaneA!  I really appreciate it.  You should have a PM in your inbox shortly.  Let me know if I can help in any way.

Oh this is Good News.... GO MR.INANSEA!!! I am still mocking up some visuals for the begining and will focus finishing it off over the weekend if possible.... It will be for the purposes to display different Ideas and suggestions..... already in the running and amalgamations or augmented suggestions. It will be somewhat crude and I understand that to sell an idea it should be done to perfection but I simply do not have the time to do all this stuff to perfection or have the skill but will do somthing to try and show alot of different ideas incorporated into the first act. And it will be up to you if you think it would work done that way or think it could be done another way better. Or simply leave things alone.

your probably right about the positioning of the tie-fighters would probably break the flow... And where you suggest it should go will probably work better.

VADER BREAKING THE GLASS LANDING PLATFORM

I also wanted to say that if you watch my rough cut 2nd version of the final act I did a mock-up of when Vader breaks the glass and I was pruposing that it would be after he finishes talking to luke when he is alone and he it goes inbetween seeing vader being assembled on the operating table and the cuts back to the landing platform glass corridor. What? Yes Vader on the operating table.... Did you watch it?

It was meant to be a reaction to Luke saying "then my father is truly dead...."

So please check this again... I thought it was an interesting idea and was not too poorly executed but you would have to imagine the glass cracking behind him as that would be CGI Effect.

There are also cut suggestions to the Father & Son dialogue which I think is a definate  improvement also.