So, let’s recap: my mother’s best friend, not even 60, was barely able to walk last week. Upon medical examination, she has amazing levels of damage to her spine. God only knows what medical science will attempt to do. My uncle is almost having a nervous breakdown because he is attempting to get my grandfather, age 82, to undergo some tests for geriatric conditions, particularly regarding his balance, and install something in the shower for the same purpose. He has gotten angry, which I have never seen him do, insisting that he wants to continue with his life as it was even after the life-threatening fall he recently took, refusing to slow down.
Warn your Grandfather about my father’s story. This started out as balance problems. He has fallen many times(though not as serious as this recent time). Last October he fell and had a gash in the back of his head that he needed staples in. He fell again in January and we think it had something to do with causing his sciatica. This inflicted terrible pain on him for about six months. He finally got an operation that cured it and was recovering when this latest fall happened. He has had severe bleeding on the brain and may never recover and be sane again. Ask your Grandfather if he wants all that. If he is on a blood thinner, it increases the risk of the bleeding on the brain.
My aunt, who’s parents are geriatric and spends a lot of time helping them, is increasingly frustrated at him because of what she perceives as his inability to help, causing friction in their marriage, with my mother, and my grandfather, whom I live in fear every day of losing or of facing senility. My mother has also discovered that apparently one of her other friends has cancer, and that some personal information she sent to the post office has gone missing. She has long live in fear of identity theft. She’s near tears. This was all just today, mind. God only knows what awaits in the future.
man, that is terrible. I don’t what to say. I will keep your family in my prayers and hope things get better.
I’ve been more comfortable coming home tonight, though from from where I should be. Though I’ve managed to set up an appointment with a psychologist, there’s not telling if he’s good or how effective he’ll be, and it’s a significant ride. More importantly, I need a fucking psyiatrist who can prescribe fucking medication. My OCD-Depression-Anxiety-whatever is not improving, particularly while I’m at work, nor is the dawning realization of what a mess I’ve made of my life. As I text my mother in the throes of some of it further stresses her, making her insist I’m suicidal. I’m not; sometimes, I’m OK, sometimes, I feel like my head will explode or the depression is an unmanageable weight. And I kind of need to keep fucking going to work.
I also have to face my other friend about the fact that this while scenario, not to mention my discomfort, means that we’re going to have to bail on our travel plans, so I’m going to have to deal with that when I get up, and I am not looking forward to it. Really, really, really, really not looking forward to, and shouldn’t have talked about it when I knew I’d chicken out, but I do feel like these recent psychological issues are a sufficient reason too. To be fair.
Good luck getting the help you need. I hope for the best.
I wish I had a vice; I could use some smoking, drinking, drugs, sex, something to take the edge off. I’m sick of not being able to sit and relax and watch TV. At least I think that’s a reasonable request. So yeah. Fun day.
trust me, you do not want to get addicted to drinking or drugs. This would only make your situation worse.