If you’re 30 and acting like this (or even like you did before all of the shtick) then you need to reevaluate a few things man.
At this point it’s probably too late for him, assuming he’s not lying. He’s apparently not a good scientist either because I don’t think that too many scientists would argue that being a 600-pound diabetic has no correlation with poor health.
EDIT: I also would expect fewer grammatical errors from a scientist. I mean really, just because you live in Japan doesn’t mean that you have to down so much saki!