Fuck me, another strong-ass episode. I’m so tired of these. Good news is my prescribing doc called, and she’s going to look into raising my meds, she’ll contact me again tomorrow. I’m on vacation now, so there’s time to work with it, at least. It’s hard to feel like I’ll ever kick this, especially since as soon as I hung up, I went back to the compulsions. But man, I am giving it some effort.

But fuck, these compulsions came back like a relapse, like all the ones I’ve fought came rushing back at once.