I’ve actually never felt better, lol. But I’m sure you’re right.
Alcohol has become your medication. You literally depend on it. If you were to try to quit on you’re own, you would start going into DTs, with profuse sweating, nausea, anxiety and cravings. You could have a seizure and possibly die. You need to quit but you need medical help to do so. Alcohol is a depressant and will contribute to bad moods and depression. You will always want to drink to avoid such feelings. Your liver is swelling and becoming cirrhotic. Please get help, both with the motivation to quit, like AA, and with the process.