Continuing to think and hope that you will have any type of relationship with this person will just destroy your mental health. Obsession only ends in disaster, so if you want this to have a “happy” ending, never attempt to contact her ever again and figure out a way to get yourself to stop thinking about her. Anything other than this will not help your situation.
I know it’s tough, but it truly is your only solution based on what I know of your situation.