The Place to Go for Emotional Support — Page 10

I can't imagine myself getting involved with women the same age or younger than I anymore -- not unless they're living anachronisms like myself, anyway.

I'm most attracted to women who are between 27 and 40 it seems.  It just seems like I connect more with them and can actually have nice conversations.  20 year old girls just get on my nerves, and honestly I think women look their best at about 35.

moviefreakedmind said:

Well this isn't an emotional problem but it is certainly a predicament. I'm in a position where I'm going to need to quit the job that I started just 3 weeks ago because I absolutely HATE it! (for reasons that I won't go into detail). In spite of hating the job, I do really like and respect my co-workers and superiors, and feel bad that I've ultimately wasted their time by quitting after the training. Not to mention that they'll also have to go through the process of interviewing and hiring again once I leave. I will give them a two week notice but am having trouble motivating myself to do that even though I know that it's more courteous to give the notice as soon as possible because of how uncomfortable that will be. It's a strange situation, but the one thing I know for sure is that this job is already a huge detriment to my physical and mental health and it absolutely MUST be quit as soon as possible because it is a horrible experience.

 It may be hard, but you have to do what you have to do.  Try to end your employment amicably, help them know you don't mean to be unreliable, and let them know you appreciate them.  Put in your two weeks, or even three or four so they know you are doing your best not to shortchange them.  Tough it out a little longer and you haven't burned a bridge while still getting out.  Good luck!

I tried to kill myself the other night.  I took 15 vics, it didn't work, for which I am somewhat thankful.  I don't even know what is wrong.  All I can think about is suicide.  I got a promotion at work a few weeks ago, and I got a raise for it today and I'm due for another raise on October 1st, and yet no matter how well things might seem on the outside, on the inside I'm crumbling.  I'm getting a lot of respect and praise at work, but people don't see that I carry a couple one shooters of tequila in my pocket and drink them in the bathrooms periodically.  They don't know that I get high on all my breaks just to keep from breaking down and crying in front of everybody.  Sure there's a few people that know I get high and that I drink, but with the exception of one (aforementioned) they don't know how bad it is.  I'm not sure what to do.

Oh, Possessed. We all love you very much. Please please please seek some real help as soon as you possibly can (like immediately right now). 

Well, as much as I still think about trying to kill myself, I really don't think that I will be pulling another stunt like that.  For the simple reason that when it didn't work, the way all that shit I took made me feel was SOOOO AWFUL... I'd rather just suffer through life than have to worry about ever feeling that way again, because any other failed suicide attempt would likely be just as painful, so at least the fear of what the failed attempt got me should probably keep me from trying again.

Possessed,  you need to get help.   You need to be in therapy and I think you probably need medication for depression.   Also, stop drinking while you work and consider that you may need get help for that as well.  Perhaps AA.  Please, please, PLEASE get help and don't pull a stunt like that again. 

I know you don't believe in God, but perhaps you might accept some sort of fate.  I am an RN as you know, and I believe I told you all that I recently moved to my preferred area of mental health.  I deal with suicidal patients every day I work.  Today at our hospital, we had a skills fair where we were supposed to present material pertinent to our floor to staff from other floors for their education in order to broaden everyone's understanding.  In my position (remember, I was recently promoted), I am educator for my floor, and therefore I am the one who presented my floor's material to the rest of the crew.  The material I presented today was, guess what?...suicide risk assessments.

In other words, this material is very fresh in my mind, so reading that you did this truly has me concerned.  But I also feel as if I am obliged to share with you the material I have been presenting.

First, do you know what the number one risk factor of suicide in a patient is?

One or more previous suicide attempts

You are now considered part of the high risk population.  Furthermore, substance abuse is a common comorbidity.  I have a feeling, whether you care to admit it or not, that your substance issues are in fact a large part of your depression.  You may say now, "I will never try that again," but you are not yet addressing the root cause of your problems.  You are actually very likely to try again, and men are far more likely to succeed in their attempts than women.

Please, I've said this before, you must get help.  Obviously your work is important to you, but you need to take the time off and get to the hospital.  First, address the alcohol withdrawals.  They can be life threatening, and you clearly are dependent.  Then stay in the hospital at receive mental health treatment.  There are medications to help you stay sober, medications that can help you fight depression, there is therapy...there is help to be had.

You are a person of fine talents, a great future.  I like you a lot, but more importantly, there are people who love you.  Think about how your actions affect your loved ones.  Think about the reason you have to live.  Please, get help.  Do what's right.  You owe yourself and your family and friends that much.  You can't wait any longer.  Get help.

Best to you my friend.  You are in my thoughts and prayers, for what that's worth to you :)

Please listen to what darth_ender is saying.  

You are in my thoughts and prayers as well.

darth_ender said:

I know you don't believe in God,

Actually, I do.  Sortof, anyway.

Please, I've said this before, you must get help.  Obviously your work is important to you, but you need to take the time off and get to the hospital. 

I agree that that would be helpful, but it just really isn't in the cards right now.  I just got this promotion, so I'm not taking time off already.  The odds of me getting the time off to get help (which I couldn't afford anyway) are pretty slim.  Even if I could get time off from work, which I couldn't, I wouldn't be able to afford any help.

 I do appreciate the thoughts guys.  And woah, Trident.  Good to see you came back.

This is more important than your work, Possessed.  GET HELP!

Possessed, we're all with you.  You've gotten some really good advice from people here already.  I hope that you find something that helps, and do post here whenever you're feeling down.  Talking it through usually helps, even if it just makes you feel that you're not alone.

Thank you for the kind words Praetor, Trident, Chew, Fan, Twist, Warb, Dom, and Andrew.  (haha, get it?)  Unfortunately I can't take any time off of work.  I will probably just spend more time with my music.

Yes you can take time off from work!  The worst that could happen is that you lose your job.  But what is worse?  Losing your job or losing your life? 

GET HELP!

Yeah well I kinda need a job to live buddy.  Most leading experts recommend you eat to stay alive.  Also there's rent.  Not to mention that the people at my job are my friends and family, and without them I would arguably be worse off than I am now.

As someone who hasn't been employed since 2008, I can certainly say that going without a job certainly isn't going to help someone facing depression feel anything but worse.

I agree with Warbler. However, since you are not planning on listening at present, please, if you feel yourself starting to slip into suicidal thinking, immediately go to the hospital. If you were injured in an accident, you wouldn't think twice about spending a few days in recovery. Suicidality is no less an emergency than a critical injury, and I'm sure your job would understand. We'll never get that cut of ROTJ if you don't get help ;) 

darth_ender said:

I agree with Warbler. However, since you are not planning on listening at present, please, if you feel yourself starting to slip into suicidal thinking, immediately go to the hospital. If you were injured in an accident, you wouldn't think twice about spending a few days in recovery. Suicidality is no less an emergency than a critical injury, and I'm sure your job would understand. We'll never get that cut of ROTJ if you don't get help ;) 

 Okay, what you guys are saying about me taking time off of work makes sense.  It really does.  But something you are failing to include in your calculations (not a criticism or anything, really I do appreciate the thoughts) is that I need my coworkers.  They are my best friends, they are my family.  They care about me on a personal level that goes beyond work.  It's not just the one lady I was talking about earlier, I'm close to a number of them as well.  Many of them know about my substance problems, many of them know about my depression problems, a few even know about both.  Only one (the lady) knows about my suicide attempt, and suffice it to say she is not happy about it.  (Not that she punishes me or tried to make me feel bad about it) She ended up in tears and asking me why I didn't call her.  I need people like that in my life, if I lose this job I lose my family.  (Because the part that is my family isn't the part that would be making the decision to fire me so I can't depend on them to help me get time off)

I can't afford counseling, at least not now.  Maybe when my raises and benefits all fully kick in (don't ask me why it's on a time table)  And actually I'm part of management now, it would be extremely inconvenient for anybody to go a step higher than me and I really don't see them doing that, because they really need me in that place.  (not being egotistically, they really truly do).  I am confident that nobody will go over my head and do something like that.  I could see them possibly getting together and asking me to go, but I really don't see them *making* me.  For one reason, they aren't stupid.  They need me and they know I need them, they aren't going to do something that would force me to be cut off from them.  I may indeed go to rehab at some point, but not so soon after getting promoted into management.