Not sure on having Vader deliver his lines behind the closed doors.
Also, when the scream was mentioned, I assumed we are talking about a scream heard by Lea coming from outside her cell from other potential prisoners (or something similar).
Actually I think placing this scream just before the switch to Vader close-up just might work.
I'm not sure if I'm explaining myself clearly.
He delivers his lines from the same place but with the door shut not open (remember the door was left open to let in the droid) with the door shut the scene is more claustrophobic.
The scream is then silenced by the scene change, the guard walking down the silent corridor (with the door shut).
This maintains the flow of the original version while adding the nasty idea that in each of those cells is another person being tortured.
I would add a slight delay between the beginning of Mr Vader's close up and the scream.
Remember Leia isn't screaming at Vader but because of something he is doing with her mind which may take a fraction of a second to switch on.
Nice work, this problem you are trying to solve has always bugged me, so I really hope you get this done. Great job so far
I'm quite looking forward to this finished edit.*fingers crossed before I'm ready to show my gf the movies*
Though I might wonder if you would possibly release a version with the mouse droid? As that seems to be a personal preference of yours and doesn't really add to the whole Stronger Vader angle.
My Edits:
Revenge of the Sith: Refocused Available
The Clone Wars Refocused: The Chosen One (Mortis Episode)
I really hope to get this done too. That might also mean that the prison cell scene might not be perfect, but I will not let one scene stop me.
As for the mouse droid, I might re-render a version with that left in, but only later.
No let me try to play around a bit with some scream sounds ;)
Just a test with a scream added, not final. Now working on reducing the torture droid sound):
Obviously you need a better scream but you know that already. Use the edit you have already made but cut out the final shot of Leia. We don't need to see her before the scream to know she is screaming as there is only one female in the room.
Just have the scream play out over Vader's mask at the highest volume you can get in the mix. Slow down the mask shot if you need to for timing reasons.
Ok, also a good idea.
I was still thinking that Lea hears a scream from outside the cell (from other prisoners) and she now knows what awaits her, so she gives a scared look, but your idea Bingo could also work. I will try both, and see what I can make to work and what not.
Btw, just a little bit of playing in Audacity and the torture droid sound is significantly reduced ;)
I agree with Bingowings. cut the last scene with Leia, and if needed, slow down the Vader close mask shot and a little (again, if needed, and just a little) the door shut. I believe the scream should be heard when the prison cell is walking away in the corridor, I think. Leia should turn to Vader a little faster, he starts talking and she is still looking at the door.
To me, this scene is becoming really great. I'm looking forward to see your edit. :)
The great thing about scenes with close shots of Vader alone is that, since he doesn't open his mouth, you can start scenes with him a little earlier or finish a little later and it is believable that it was filmed that way in the first place. I think that can be used to in the scene to achieve what you want.
Suggestions (links/audio files) for the scream are welcome ;)
Test 3 (Vader close-up, Leia's scream, door close).
I think It works quite well, I just need a better scream sample. Also, as mentioned, the torture droid sound is significantly reduced.
That's really working well.
The scream is better, is it Jamie Lee Curtis?
It is actually the very same scream :)
I got it from a website with free sound samples. If anyone can provide me with a better scream, I'll be happy to use it.
The second scream here around 1:13 is...pretty.
A test of removing the comment regarding the mind probe:
I was skeptical at first, but now I think it sounds pretty good. What do you think?
I also think I'll slow down some of Vader's jerky head movements in this scene. Just doesn't look right.
I think the line delivery is perfect. That is, I can tell since I'm looking for the cut, and you could possibly smooth it over more. But if I weren't thinking about it, which I wouldn't if I were watching a whole movie cut, there'd be no issue whatsoever.
I am not sure about the cutting out the torture droid but It's ok. You can tell it's been edited.
The other one is really good and smooth edit and you would never know the difference.
I agree that the torture droid removal is not perfect, but to me it is better than keeping the droid, and also it is the best I could do (for now at least).
I try to see if I can smooth things out a bit, and also maybe try some other screams. In any case, the torture droid will not be in the final edit ;)
Slowly moving towards finishing this thing... ;)
Rendering the first test of the final version. If there are one or two serious testers out there and interested, PM me. I'd like an honest comment before I finalize the edit.
I would really like tk be one of the testers and give you an honest feedback but i don't have the time at the moment due to work and being flat out.
I doubt you will struggle to find people to test it but I may find the time to do this next week if that is suitable for you and there is no rush depending on how things pan out I will PM you
Just sent the DL link of the one forum member. One or two testers are still welcome.
Some recent changes:
Purpose: improve pacing while taking out some (in my opinion) most obviously outdated shoots.
The whole edit is 2:11 min shorter than ANH:R.
If I had the time to preview, I would do so for you. As it is, I have little time to sit and watch a movie, much less a movie my wife wouldn't want to see also. I am looking forward to seeing this when things settle down a bit.