DuracellEnergizer said:

RicOlie_2 said:

I would suggest a template. It's hard to get anywhere without one and easy to get stuck without having an idea of what's coming next.

Oh, I do have the general plot worked out. When I meant template, I meant another body of work to work off of (a script, a book, etc.).

I see. I thought you were trying to write linearly without any kind of structure! :)

I really enjoyed it, but don't you think the first two thirds or so are a bit too reminiscent of the opening of A New Hope? Of course it won't be as noticeable with the rest of the story afterward, but maybe that's something to think about for a future draft. I think parallels work well, but be careful not to overdo them.

Yes, it's very reminiscent of the opening of Star Wars. But that's what I was going for; I wanted the beginning to mirror that of the first movie, but with the details switched around (the camera panning up instead of down, the ships moving under a water planet instead of over a desert planet, etc.).

You don't really have to worry about too many parallels, though; from here on out the story goes off in a completely different direction.

I see it now. It would probably look better on screen than it would on "paper" anyway.