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Post #667707

Author
NeverarGreat
Parent topic
STAR WARS EPISODE VII - JEDI DAWN
Link to post in topic
https://originaltrilogy.com/post/id/667707/action/topic#667707
Date created
27-Oct-2013, 8:46 PM

I really like the present tense for the crawl as well, however it seems unfitting to talk about events which happened thirty years ago as if they happened yesterday. It would be like saying:

It is a time of civil war. After maiming the Sith Lord Darth Vader in a duel, Obi-wan Kenobi has gone into exile on the remote world of Tatooine. Meanwhile, the Rebel Alliance has won it's first victory against the evil GALACTIC EMPIRE.

While there is nothing technically wrong with this statement, it makes it seem like these two events happen in quick succession. Especially problematic is that Luke and Leia "head into exile", which implies that we will meet up with them a few days after the Endor disaster. I think the first two parts of your crawl do work better though, but it may work better if the last bit was rewritten to say:

Narrowly ecaping the destruction of Endor, the rebel heroes Luke and Leia Skywalker toil in exile, determined to gather new strength in the fight for freedom and justice among the darkening stars....

This way the hinge of time rests on "toil in exile" instead of "head into exile", which can imply as much time as necessary.

I'm glad I've converted you to the Dark Side of the Star Wars sequels; in time, you will call the true Emperor "Master"!