Jesus in Australia

Here.

Was on the news here this morning. Nut job.

Phew, for a minute there when I first read the thread title I was worried Chewtobacca was getting ready to pull a Trooperman on us.

It doesn't work like that.

I've been around a number of higher beings and it's always the same, whatever they say in whatever language gets translated to a watery Australian English dialect specific to the first half of the 21st Century of Earth, Sol 3, Mutter's Spiral.

Not only is it mysterious it's very off putting to hear an eight foot falcon headed bronze age deity refer to his consort as Sheila.

Chewtobacca said:

Here.

*sigh*

The communion lager is like making love in a canoe.

Leonardo said:

Apparently Jesus is going to write new commandments.

They are as follows:

I . Thou shalt have no poofters.

II . Thou shalt not maltreat the "Abbos" in any way whatsoever—if there's anyone watching.

III . Thou shalt have no poofters.

IV . Thou shalt not drink in thy room after lights out.

V . No poofters.

VI. Thou shalt not have.... a sixth commandment.

VII . Thou shalt have no poofters.

^^uncanny^^ lol. You forgot, Thou shall spill the Blood of thine Pom enemy when Thou is referred to as a Colonial convict

A lot of people in this country pooh-pooh Australian table wines. This is a pity, as many fine Australian wines appeal not only to the Australian palette, but also to the cognoscenti of Great Britain.

"Black Stump Bordeaux" is rightly praised as a peppermint flavoured Burgundy, whilst a good "Sydney Syrup" can rank with any of the world's best sugary wines.

"Chateau Bleu", too, has won many prizes; not least for its taste, and its lingering afterburn.

"Old Smokey, 1968" has been compared favourably to a Welsh claret, whilst the Australian wino society thouroughly recommends a 1970 "Coq du Rod Laver", which, believe me, has a kick on it like a mule: 8 bottles of this, and you're really finished -- at the opening of the Sydney Bridge Club, they were fishing them out of the main sewers every half an hour.

Of the sparkling wines, the most famous is "Perth Pink". This is a bottle with a message in, and the message is BEWARE!. This is not a wine for drinking -- this is a wine for laying down and avoiding.

Another good fighting wine is "Melbourne Old-and-Yellow", which is particularly heavy, and should be used only for hand-to-hand combat.

Quite the reverse is true of "Chateau Chunder", which is an Appelachian controle, specially grown for those keen on regurgitation -- a fine wine which really opens up the sluices at both ends.

Real emetic fans will also go for a "Hobart Muddy", and a prize winning "Cuiver Reserve Chateau Bottled Nuit San Wogga Wogga", which has a bouquet like an aborigine in his armpit.

As I was walking through Earls Court, into a pub I was lured. Where a nosy Pom said, "where you from?" as I downed the amber fluid. I said, "get it straight I'm an Aussie mate, and I'm looking to get plastered. But the beer is crook and the birds all look like you, you Pommy..."

George Hamel has left behind a business and his wife in California to be closer to Mr Miller and his teachings.

Ladies and Gentlemen, humanity!

Trapped in a time loop, of course.

¡BANG!

!BANG¡

That's the next town over from where I live.

I've been trying to find out who it was. I know a lot of people in that town but nobody seems to be talking..

Leonardo said:

some things that were incredibly racist and homophobic.

Not cool, bro.

Hail Satan.