I'm going to give my thoughts as i go through this.
First off, kudos for taking this on.
1. The opening sequence that you nabbed from that fan-film. I understand why it's there; I assume you want to have some form of an action opening. But I don't know what's going on there. What ship was that? Are we to assume that's a rebel ship Vader blew out of the sky? We need more information. Such as a conversation between officers talking about Vader blasting anything out of the sky that remotely looks like a rebel ship. Again, not sure how to fix that, but it's a confusing opening as is.
2. My other problem is the sequence where the Emperor flies to the Eclipse. It's a scene that isn't needed. It doesn't push the story forward. We already know the Emp. is coming as per Vader; so it's just unnecessary and does nothing really for the story. However the shots of coruscant are quite nice and I would love to see those implemented elsewhere.
3. The Eclipse shot approaching the death star is really really bad. And again not needed. I think original shots work fine by themselves.
4. This isn't a deal breaker for me, but I'm not loving Jabba's new dialogue and mainly for one reason. You make him to be quite stupid, and that's not his character. The reason Luke's mind trick doesn't work on him is because he isn't weak-minded. Just food for thought.
Now what I do like... I like the way you re-edited. I like the rearrangement of scenes.
What I loved? The scene where Vader is connecting to Luke and the whole integration of that deleted scene. Nice work.
Mostly in this first part, you have more good than bad. I'm just listing the things I had issues. But again, there is more going right with this than wrong.
I'll write more as I watch more. Thanks!