A (Secret) Letter from an admirer

Dear Miss Gaffer Tape ,

You may not recall my PENCIL, but I met you at the DIRTY cocktail party given by our UGLY friend, Greenie. We had a HAIRY talk about RECLUSIVE DVDS, and I was impressed by your SMELLY conversation and your grasp of the WIERD situation. Also I was very much attracted by your, SMALL eyes, your TALL little chin, and your MAGNIFICENT teeth. If you'll pardon me for seeming DISGUSTING, I was fascinated by your INFECTED walk and by your CRANKY figure. I hope I made a BOSSY impression, and that we can get together for a nice IPOD next week.

SMOOTHLY yours,

ZIGGY STARDUST