If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey.
Even if it has a monkey-kind of shape.
If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey.
If it doesn't have a tail, it's not a monkey, it's an ape!
Bicycles don't have tails, therefore, they're apes.
Mice have tails, therefore, they're monkeys.
Kites have tails, therefore, they're monkeys.
The Millennium Falcon doesn't have a tail, therefore, it's an ape.