Good Sir,
It has been brought to my attention that you are using my name and visage without expressed written consent, and therefore are in direct violation of many U.S. and International treaties. If you would be so kind as to fill out the attached royalty form and send it back with the required processing fee, I will be sure to forward it on to the Nigerian Prince whom holds the rights to my brand.
Observantly Yours,
Ric Olie