mmm... I... guess that's not going to work, now is it?... I suppose then you could go out and buy a copy of the book, learn how to mix drinks, become a bartender, earn two weeks' worth of salary plus tips, and spend the cash on a nice fan.
Either that or screw the book, save a little cash and buy a fan. But learning the art of mixing drinks is tempting..... Ok I'll buy the book, and you'll get the fan.