You know you're a George Lucas fan when...

- you think a salt-and-pepper beard + a flannel shirt = sexy

- you talk so weakly that your voice frequently drops into a kind of whispery rattle

- your favorite film is a six-way tie between:

1. Revenge of the Sith (2005)
2. A New Hope (2004)
3. The Empire Strikes Back (2004)
4. Return of the Jedi (2004)
5. Attack of the Clones (2002)
6. The Phantom Menace (1999)

- you've got a Marcia Lucas dartboard

- you can recall every interview George gave on the subject of a six-part Star Wars saga, dismissing those fake ones where GL supposedly said that there were going to be twelve or nine films

- you've ruined more than one relationship by shouting, "Faster! More intense!" at the worst possible moment

- you often inject insulin in tribute

- you were bored out of your skull watching It's A Wonderful Life for its disgraceful lack of CGI

You misquote yourself all of the time, and claim that everyone else (including VCRs) are the one's making it up.

Your dream is to become powerful enough to fire everyone who's ever disagreed with you on a collaborative project.