Bingowings said:
Here's my stab at a new crawl for TPM (it needs to be spaced better because the .... is floating on it's own) :

I like where you're going with this, but it seems a little wordy. He's my humble stab at a re-write.

"The Golden Age of the GALACTIC REPUBLIC is at an end.

Peace and stability have reigned for a thousand generations since the defeat of the vile SITH LORDS, but the Galactic Senate grows weak and complacent. Slavery and corruption sweep the worlds at the edges of the galaxy and the JEDI KNIGHTS, the Republics's keepers of peace and freedom, are bound by ancient law from intervening.

In a shocking move, the interstellar merchants of the TRADE FEDERATION has directed a massive battle fleet to blockade the peaceful world of Naboo. While the Senate debates endlessly, two Jedi knights are dispatched in secret to investigate what is behind this troubling turn of events..."