Darknikos, I believe in page 79 of HTTE, the name of Karrde's Vornskyr should be Sturm, not Strum. Sturm and Drang is one of Zahn's many references to Earth culture, as it was a movement in German art and literature in the late 1700s.

Also, I believe that the scene where Luke takes his lightsaber back worked better without the one-panel saber crossing. Your edit makes their confrontation less psychological and more physical, and while it might have worked if you had more material of the two of them dueling to work with, it just feels kind of silly as it is to me. Just my opinion, of course.

You did make the first story work without the ysalimiri, and though I liked them for the implications they have in the third book in conjunction with cloning, I like HTTE without them as well.