RoccondilRinon said:Asteroid-Man said:RoccondilRinon said:Two major comments. I like the style you're going for, but there are two things I have to say.
1. The font you use in your logo. Arial? Kill it. Anywhere you can use Arial, Helvetica does a better job. If you don't have it, I do.
2. The wording of the opening slides needs work; it reads quite clumsily. If you like, I can give them a slight rewrite to show you what I mean.
The font is not Arial. It's Star Jedi. Unless you mean for "A-Man Productions". That's Zekton. I'm keeping those fonts, I like them and think they fit the new tone I'm aiming for.
The word "PRODUCTIONS" is in Arial, or something that resembles it and is equally ugly. The other fonts are fine.
My take on the opening crawl:
Turmoil had engulfed the Galactic Senate. Several thousand solar systems, led by the mysterious Count Dooku, had declared their intentions to leave the Old Republic.
The Jedi Knights, guardians of peace and justice in the Galaxy, were becoming overwhelmed. The Senate proposed creating a Grand Army of the Republic to assist them. Senator Amidala was returning to the Senate to vote on this critical issue....
The most important changes are the spelling "led", not "lead", and the "who were meant to", which doesn't fit the epic feel of the piece. The rest is more my own personal take, but I hope it's useful.
Oh yeah that's in Arial Bold and I'm keeping that. I want that to be bland because that's not the highlight of the Logo. Thanks for your edit of the credits. There's also another one that opens to "Present" scenes (ANH) also in the first post in Italic.
DarthBo said:Asteroid-Man said:InfoDroid said:The only other thing I'd say is that you have a little music bleed-through from the original track which (as I've found) is unavoidable unless you scrap the soundtrack completely and create your own soundtrack with your own effects from the bottom-up.
I thought I had isolated the music bleed. That's odd, are you sure it's not just the music I put in? If you could tell me at which point I can try and isolate it some more.
I noticed it as well, it's very obvious at 1:52-54
I really like the new music, keep it up!
Oh I know what you're talking about. That's apart of the music I put in. It has a lot of eerie background music. Check out the song, I posted the name above.