First off, I want to say that I totally agree that relaxing and not stressing or blowing an artery when it comes to our fandom is a great idea, and one that I whole-heartedly agree with. And Star Wars does hold a high place in all of our hearts. We wouldn't be here if that wasn't true. That said, I doubt most of the people who post here really take it as seriously as they seem. Obviously, being a Star Wars website, our views of other people are pretty limited... limited to Star Wars. So just because someone rants around here doesn't meant that they think much of it when they're not here. I have to admit that, even though I haven't thought too highly of the new Clone Wars movie, it's been exciting solely because it invigorated more debate and discussion. Up until last month I really hadn't followed the General Star Wars boards in several months. And keep in mind this is coming from the guy who's constantly saying he wishes Star Wars would stop putting out new material entirely!
As far as a middle ground goes, I don't think there is a set criteria for people who take a middle ground. I think of a middle ground as someone who, like you said, neither worships and reveres every movie change, release, or every one of Lucas's lies as gospel, nor bitch and moan and post about how they wish Lucas would die or something equally morbid and cruel. Other than that, I don't think there's going to be a set fandom rule of thumb for movie evaluation that's going to fit anybody. For example, I consider myself a mostly middle of the road fan, but I don't accept the SEs at all, and I do enjoy watching the prequels on occasion (even though they sometimes make me cringe and I don't have much respect for them, they are entertaining and a bit of a guilty pleasure), and I do have a modest selection of EU books (just bought and finished reading Splinter of the Mind's Eye).
Well, I do hope this thread inspires some lively debate!