So I think that Adywan's efforts should be kept to his own preferred version at the moment, where uploading 'ammended' versions of it is concerned.
I liked his 'Alderaan' scene too by the way, and there's a little bit of me that would like to include a snippet of it like this, while still keeping most of the original scene's pace - 'Death Star' fires as normal at Alderaan, then just as planet is hit with laser, we cut to the close up of 'Jar Jar' briefly seeing the impending, overwhelming 'surface rupture' coming towards him, then we cut back to the rest of the original shot just as the laser blast recedes before the big explosion. Poor 'Bail' though... :)