Excerpts from the next great prison drama, The Shawshank Retraction.
Inmates: "Fresh Fish! Fresh Fish!"
Sen. Larry Craig: You don't understand, I'm not supposed to be here!
Captain Hadley: I'm not gonna to count to three. I'm not even gonna count to one. You will shut the FUCK up or I'll sing you a lullaby!
Sen. Larry Craig: I have no enemies here.
Red: Yeah? Wait a while. Word gets around. The Sisters have taken quite a likin' to you. Especially Boggs.
Sen. Larry Craig: I don't suppose it would help if I told them that I'm not homosexual.
Sen. Larry Craig: We'll fight this like hell!
Boggs: Yeah, you fight. It's better that way.
Tommy Williams: What are you in for?
Sen. Larry Craig: Me? I'm innocent. My lawyer fucked me.
Red: You gonna open it, or stand there with your thumb up your butt?
Sen. Larry Craig: Thumb up my butt sounds better.
Sen. Larry Craig: Hey, boss ... bathroom break?