Episode III is split into three discernible acts.
Act I: Most reminiscent of Episode I.
This is the more playful, childish act that shows the characters in how they were allowing for a dichotomy against what would become of them and heightening the tragedy that will befall them with the destruction of Obi-Wan and Anakin's friendship.
Act II: Most reminiscent of Episode II.
This shows Anakin and Padme, showing their love for eachother, their lives together, their short lived family life, and the lengths to which Anakin is willing to go to save the one he loves.
Act III: The Climactic ending to Episode III.
This shows the fall of the Jedi, the turning of Anakin, the destruction of a friendship, and the placing of the pieces to be ready for the next film.
The problem I most have with your edit is that in killing Dooku so quickly, and without remorse, it does two things:
Firstly, It stands out, alone, as quite possibly the darkest moment ever. Anakin is neither visibly angry with Dooku, nor does he seem to shaken by what he's done afterwards (only apologetic to the extent which he can be with the Chancellor.)
And secondly, it removes that which becomes a very prevelent theme in this film: Palpatine's Seduction. Perhaps one of the greatest themes in the film, also the underlying theme of the series, is Palpatine's ability to seduce actions out of people. In Palpatine being able to get Anakin to kill Dooku, he proves to himself that not only is Anakin a worthy apprentice in his ability of mastering the force, but also that he has control over Anakin...to the extent that he can make Anakin do something he KNOWS is wrong and he KNOWS he shouldn't have done.
When Anakin tells him all this, Palpatine teaches Anakin the trick that allows all evil people to be evil: compliance. By teaching Anakin how to rationalize what he's just done, he becomes compliant to it and through the rest of the film, learns how to rationalize everything he's done and feel no guilt for it and be able to bold-face LIE to Padme.
Personally, I see nothing wrong with the film edit as it was. Yes there were a few shots that could have been tightened, and it did have a slightly childlike attitude (fully intentional) but it also did what it needed to. If anything is to blame for the sequence being strange it is the performances themselves. Christopher Lee did all his parts in about 20 minutes. The rest was another stand in.
I dunno, I guess I'm curious what you were trying for and what your reasoning is for this heh...