Originally posted by: Sluggo

Originally posted by: Master Skywalker
I already did

My new ROTJ crawl:

Episode III
Revenge of the Jedi

The rebellion is doomed. The GALACTIC EMPIRE is about
to finish the construction of a new armored space station,
even stronger then the first dreaded DEATH STAR.

While the rebel fleet is regrouping to form a GREAT
REBEL FLEET, Luke Skywalker, the last JEDI KNIGHT
alive, is returning to his homeplanet of Tatooine to
rescue rebel general HAN SOLO from the cluthes
of the vile gangster JABBA THE HUTT.

Its a hard time for the remaining freedom fighters,
that are trying to restore justice and freedom to the
galaxy, and the empire is preparing for the final
battle . . .

I think its better but the end needs a little work. Any ideas are always welcome

I think I would make the verb usage more active, so it should read, for example, "the Galactic Empire is completing construction of..." Also the last sentence ought to reflect what is beginning the movie, so ou should mention Vader arriving to finish construction on schedule.

Edited the last sentence:
It is a perilous time for the remaining freedom fighters
struggling to restore peace and justice to the galaxy,
as the Empire prepares its fleet for the final
battle . . .

Now it doesn't reflect the beginning anymore and I nearly need to edit the crawl text