The hardest part in all this is the realisation that, while I can fairly lay part of the blame on my in-laws, I have some real issues that I need to sort out. If everything happens for a reason, this happened to make me get off my arse and go and get some help. I can move out of State and run away from my North Dakotan problems, but I can't run from the problems inside myself.
And hang in there Warbler - There's someone out there for everyone.