2) I already work at a retail store so anything that you guys need I'm already in the right spot.
3) I can get everything there on discount, saves the company money.
4) Until promoted from bitch I would just use my money to buy the stuff, saves the company money
5) I used to be a manager of a Pizza parlor so I can make a mean pizza
6) I'm old enough to buy alcohol
7) I don't need my mom to drive me to work.
8) I forgot what 8 was for.
9) I'm not AWK.
10) I believe in honesty, trust, and selflessness (but I will sleep with your girlfriend)
11) I believe in lying, manipulating, and selfishness (so I can sleep with your girlfriend)
12) I OWN A RANCOR!
13) I have children so if need be I can read you night night stories.
14) I OWN A RANCOR!
15) I'm a quick learner
16) I stick to it 'till the job is done.
17) I only buy the softest toilet paper.
18) I'm have money.
19) I also have a huge library of information readily available at my fingertips.
20) I OWN A RANCOR!
For a bigger picture click here.
I'm not sure what my Rancor is doing here. He's either offering you a bribe to hire me or this was taken the last time we went to the strip club together!