It's poetic, but abstract, and I don't think you're getting as much bang for your buck as you should be in a two-minute trailer. Also, you might try to snip out "harmony would yield to discord and..." to simply say "if the three golden balls were ever taken away, the city would fall to destruction and death." At any rate, you really need the "in the city" before "there dwelt a lowly shoemaker." It's a pretty painful sentence fragment otherwise.
I like the idea of using so much of the original narration, but for this movie deserves a trailer that shows off some of the amazing animation, which kind of needs big music.