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Or "I am glad to be single because I am to cowardly to ask a girl out, except for that one girl but she asked me out day".
Like the title?
Nice one.
I'd like to declare today "It's what? Valentine's Day? Oh, is that what all the chocolate and roses were for! Gee, when was the last time I bought a rose for someone other than my mother. Oh, yeah, for my cousin's grad. That was one heck of a party. I love small town grads, because everyone knows people are just getting plastered after the show. Alcohol would be a good idea right now. I may not be dating anyone, but a beer never says 'Not tonight, honey.' What about that girl I was drinking with last week? What was her name again? Ah, who cares? She works evenings all week and I work days. Too bad, too. Maybe I should do some shopping. I've got to buy some saffron and ginger. Hey, when does the Asian Market close? 5:30? Wow, I'd better run then! Day."