You’re absolutely right - after making my point about prequel Anakin being ‘Conan’, I was referencing the ‘certain point of view’ in RoTJ. So yeah, I am technically off-topic in that regard.
That said, I still think the ‘promise to Padme’ thing would be an improvement with RoTJ as is.
In RoTJ Obi Wan says “I took it upon myself to train him as a Jedi”. We now know that Qui Gon made him promise to do so, but Obi Wan keeps that detail to himself and doesn’t whine about this additional fact - taking the responsibility himself. Which is noble. Similarly, had he vowed to Padme that he would not tell the truth to the kids, his vague explanation in RoTJ would come across the same way. He’d be taking all the responsibility in the context of that conversation, but we would all know that it was much more complicated. There would be a dramatic scene in RoTS where Padme expresses that Anakin is dead, Vader is a separate entity as far as she’s concerned, and that she wants Obi Wan to never tell her kids the awful truth. Obi Wan would express that he agrees with her perspective, Anakin is indeed ‘dead’, and vows to honour her wishes regarding the children.
Again, this makes his lie in '77 much more plausible. He’s expressing his ‘certain point of view’ but with the added weight of his vow to Padme. And again, this also justifies his being tight-lipped about the truth when Luke jets off for Bespin. By that stage he would arguably be inclined to spill the beans right? But his vow remains.
I just think this would make all the ‘point of view’ stuff - which very few folks find convincing - much more plausible and indeed rather poignant.
But again, I think that’s closer to expecting ROTS to fix what the OT established.
Again, I don’t see too much of a difference here. Not only do I think that doesn’t connect to Luke, as Padme’s pursuit of the idea that Anakin is still capable of changing back I think is reflected in Luke more personally (Padme and Luke to me have an engaging, yet tragic, comparison in ways), to me, in ROTJ, but also I’m not sure I buy that someone like her may view it in those terms of someone being dead because they turned evil, and I don’t think it makes it more honoring of her or sensible that Obi chooses instead to tell Luke that Vader killed his dad. If anything, I think that kinda makes it look, to me, like he’s kinda twisting Padme’s dying wish to get what he wants. I don’t think that makes him look better and kinda leaves his twisting of Padme’s wish just untouched.