Here are my ideas, as promised, for re-cutting the Cliegg Lars breakfast table scene. As it stands, it's a weirdly edited scene that features Cliegg trying to drum up excitement over his story. The scene should have played out over the reactions on Anakin and Padme's faces. That's what I want to create. Here goes--
INT. TATOOINE, HOMESTEAD, KITCHEN - LATE DAY
BERU puts several steaming cups of ardees on a tray and exits the kitchen... (Trooperman: ADD cool kitchen sounds like in ANH)
CLIEGG (O.S.)
It was just before dawn. They
came out of nowhere. A hunting
party of Tuskin Raiders.
We follow Beru upstairs...
INT. TATOOINE, HOMESTEAD, DINING AREA - LATE DAY
CLIEGG, OWEN, PADME and ANAKIN sit around the table, BERU brings the drinks from the kitchen.
(TROOPERMAN: Try cropping the Full Screen shot of this -- make more interesting composition, like the time Luke had a meal here. Try to lose Padme taking off her coat-- what's up with that?)
Re-synching/Changing dialogue without cutting: (Match Cliegg saying "halfway" with lip-flap as his mouth forms the word "evaporator." Move the preceding dialogue up until the whole thing plays. Remember there can be nice... long... pauses... it is an emotional scene.)
CLIEGG
From the tracks, she
was about halfway when--
CUT TO: c.u. of Anakin.
CLIEGG (O.S.)
--they took her. Those Tuskens walk like
men, but they're vicious --
CUT TO: c.u. of Padme.
CLIEGG (O.S.)
--mindless monsters.
CUT TO: c.u. of Cliegg.
CLIEGG
Thirty of us went after her.
Four of us came back.
CUT TO: c.u. of Anakin.
CLIEGG (O.S.)
--I don't want to give up on her, but
she's been gone a month.
CUT TO: c.u. of Padme.
CLIEGG (O.S.)
--There's little hope she's lasted this--
CUT TO: c.u. of Cliegg (use image of him saying the word "heal..."; trails off, looking sad and broken)
CLIEGG
--long.
CUT TO: med. 3- Shot. Anakin stands as Owen and Cliegg look on.
OWEN
Where are you going?
ANAKIN
To find my mother.
CUT TO: c.u. of Padme (the one they used after all dialogue is over. Time the shot so her eyes turn down when she hears the line "accept it.")
CLIEGG (O.S.)
Your mother's dead, son. Accept it.
CUT TO:
EXT. TATOOINE, HOMESTEAD, MOISTURE FARM - LATE DAY
ANAKIN stands looking across the desert. PADME comes running out of the homestead after him. ANAKIN turns to PADME.
(speed this fu*ker up-- we see that hut for a good 2 seconds before she comes out the door, why?
--Start the "Binary Sunset" cue (or whatever it's called) early, like here... Let it play out more completely before cutting to the next location)
Anakin and Padme hug-- we see only their shadows. No dialogue except...
PADME
Anakin...
ANAKIN walks over to Owen's speeder bike, which is standing close by.
ANAKIN takes off across the desert. PADME watches him go.
***
This version keys us more into Anakin's head and Padme's concern for him. She's there with him every step of the way. When he decides he has to go, she's right there with him and nothing needs to be said. She hugs him and says his name to show her support ...and he goes. Much more romantic to my way of seeing it.
Thoughts?